This is sort of shocking, honestly — who would have thought that a guy who’s so great at throwing fancy dinner parties and entertaining guests would be such a shitty gift-giver? President Obama gave British Prime Minister Gordon Brown a set of 25 great American films on his recent visit to the US, whereas Brown gave Obama a pen, for heaven’s sake, and a book. Millions of Britons are appalled at this asymmetry of gifts. Why must Barack Obama crap all over our “special relationship” with Britain, &c. &c? [Daily Mail]

So, British Prime Minister Gordon Brown was at the White House today, where he was SNUBBED by elitist American Barack Obama, who did not worship the Special Relationship enough to hold a joint press conference with Brown. Also, who the fuck cares about Gordon Brown, right? Unless you want to talk about a country with an even worse financial/banking situation than the United States, that is! MORE »

Every four years, Europeans get mad at Americans because only stupid ignorant U.S. citizens get to elect their president (who is always George W. Bush). So this year our friends overseas were delighted to participate in a meaningless poll conducted by the Telegraph, which showed conclusively that your average bewhiskered European hausfrau is just as hot for Barack Obama as millions of recently graduated American college seniors. But who digs Obama the most? The answer may shock you! MORE »

Since his first choice for President didn’t work out and now spends his days angrily catfighting with James Carville on CNN, President Josiah “Martin Estevez Sheen” Bartlet has found solace in the arms of Barack Obama. But just like his old crush Bill Richardson, he is afraid that former “Real President” Bill Clinton will be mad at him — so he made his announcement overseas in England where none of the English-speaking public would let slip this shocking revelation. MORE »

New-age “Cool Britannia” third-way bullshitter Tony Blair didn’t get his dream job (Pope of the UN/EU) so he’s taken the next best thing: a lecturing gig at Yale! Tony has always loved the Ivy League types, and it didn’t really matter whether Bill Clinton or George W. Bush were in the White House — they went to Yale, so he loved them like brothers. MORE »

Ha ha, have you ever heard anyone compare a Congressman or Senator to a sex worker? Because they will apparently do anything for money, you see! Oh, what a delightfully raunchy barb. But the Foreigns, as usual, do us one better. You see, in several Foreign countries, actual sex workers — including strippers and prostitutes — get themselves elected to political office! And, um, people who play strippers in movies, and speaking of movies, we have video, after the jump! MORE »

Americans in the Greater Brackish Waters Of The Chesapeake/Potomac Region have joined many other states in throwing their collective panties at Barry Hussein! With Obamamentum gaining speed, the left needs to ask itself what it always asks itself when it comes time to make important decisions: “What do filthy foreigners think about this?” Fortunately, the aforementioned Foreigns are willing to talk about it, at great length, on the Internet! Also, is Barack Obama secretly Iranian, too? MORE »

If Americans know one thing about the Foreigns (and sometimes that’s a near thing), it’s that they live in Foreign countries, which, obviously, are hellholes of awfulness and despair. Guess if they didn’t want to be crapped on day and night by a malevolent universe, they should have lived in America! This week, the Foreigns introduces you to some happenings overseas that we can safely laugh at only because they only happen to Foreign types, but otherwise they’d be pretty depressing. MORE »

Hello everyone, and welcome to this week’s edition of The Foreigns: They’re Just Like Us! Our goal as always is to prove that we Americans and those foreign Foreigns have nothing to fear from one another, and that under our variously colored skins, we’re really more alike than different. For instance, did you know that, like you, the Foreigns can’t get enough of the infectious 2002 smash hit single “In da club?” Also like you, they have ludicrously misguided ideas about AIDS, are racists, and are high as fucking kites. Join us for a guided tour of depravity, after the jump! MORE »

If you’re an American and you read this site, you are almost certainly embarrassed by this nation’s government. Was it for this, you wonder, that our forefathers pledged their sacred honor to fight the tyrant British, or rose up to free themselves from bondage and discrimination, or travelled across the ocean with nothing but the clothes on their backs: so that we could live under a government where venality and corruption are the order of the day, where criminals make war for profit and a surprising number of powerful individuals use their influence to procure the favor of teenage boys? Wouldn’t we better off living somewhere, anywhere, but America? Don’t foreigners have it better than we do? MORE »

Actual AP headline: “Schwarzenegger’s blueprint for terminating British PM.” [Brietbart/AP]