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Three irrepressible scamps in the Michigan House singlehandedly ended the War On Women Thursday with a tweeted photo of themselves reading Ladies’ Magazines. The picture, snapped by Michigan Public Radio reporter Jake Neher, quoted one of the special snowflakes, state Rep. Pete Pettalia (dude with the mustache in the trio above), who repeated the joke […]

The always-quotable Sen. Rand Paul put a funny joke up on the Twitter Machine today! Only question is… (*snrkk!!!*) how would anyone even know the difference?? HAW HAW HAW! We can hardly wait for the nine paid staffers of Twitchy to condemn Sen. Paul for his very offensive breach of civility. Speaking of which, dear […]

Hurrah, Yr Derp Roundup is back after a brief hiatus, and we are delighted to bring you a premium selection of the gunk that was stuck to our browser tabs, stories that didn’t quite merit a post of their own, but were too stupid to ignore altogether. We recommend adding the reality-dilution substances of your […]

Over in our Wonket Sekrit Chatcave, a debate is raging as to whether or not this dumbass article on Thought Catalog is satire or unvarnished dumbass or some combination thereof? We’re not sure, but let’s get to mocking this guy who thinks (?) free speech is threatened by muting someone on Twitter. Yes, you might […]

Pioneering aggravation aggregator Matt Drudge has gone and sent every single one of his Tweets down the memory hole, and nobody knows why. It’s kind of like that time when George Washington killed his sensei in a duel — there’s just no knowing the man’s mind, and it would be a mistake to try.

Is Dok Zoom enjoying his couple days off? Probably! But before he headed out, we made him sluice out the comments queue. It was not pretty. First up, a reply to the first of our two stories about South Dakota state Rep. Steve Hickey, who objects to men doing it in the butt. This comment […]

Oh hai, Glenn Greenwald, how are you being an atrocious monstrous hellbeast today? Oh, you are the one human being on earth who doesn’t think World President Barack Obama should bonk Nigerian president Goodluck Jonathan on the head, tie him up in his presidential palace, and send Seal Teams Six, Seven, Eight and Thirteen to […]

Exciting news in the 2014 race for Legislative Shitmuffin of the Year! An anti-evolution set of science education standards sponsored by one of our leading candidates, South Carolina state Sen. Mike Fair, has passed in committee, and will now go to the state Board of Education for consideration. The standards would require science teachers in […]

Welcome to Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we give our browser tabs a Silkwood shower and serve up the runoff to you, the reader. Add whatever reality-dilution agents you think may be necessary. Our Lead Derp this week comes from the Boise suburb of Meridian, Idaho, where the school board removed an award-winning Young […]

The unknown mayor of Peoria, Illinois, has gotten the memo: Abusing power is super awesome, so everyone should totes start doing it, RIGHT NOW. Mayor Jim Ardis, whom no one outside of Peoria has ever heard of, would like everyone to know that he REALLY can’t take a joke and that he will send armed police […]

Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we scrape the dumbest possible news leftovers off our overheated browser tabs, blend them into an almost-digestible slurry, and serve them up to you with a muffin and a warning to imbibe heavily. Our Prime Derp this week is actually not so much the […]

As you can see, terrible no-goodnik and Friend of Wonkette Dan Savage is brutally attacking Christian Purity again, on the Twitters, by making fun of Professional Virgin Jill Duggar. Obviously, this makes him the biggest hypocrite ever, according to the 9 fulltime employees at Twitchy. Hey, Dan Savage! Stop sneering at virginity!

The Pulitzer Prizes were announced Monday afternoon, with top honors going to The Guardian and The Washington Post for their coverage of the Edward Snowden NSA revelations. That news was largely lost on users of Twitter, however, as they all were looking at pictures of a model airplane with its cockpit inserted into a lady’s […]

Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we bring you a bunch of stories that didn’t quite merit a post of their own, but that were far too stupid to ignore altogether. Apply alcohol directly to your central processing unit as needed. Or your computer’s. For the second week in a […]

Ever had an old person walk up to you on the street and ask you a completely bizarre question, like, “Why do all the apples send moonbeams into your brain?” No? Well, doesn’t happen to us either. But at a Senate hearing yesterday, David Cohen, undersecretary of treasury for terrorism and financial intelligence, was testifying […]