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The unknown mayor of Peoria, Illinois, has gotten the memo: Abusing power is super awesome, so everyone should totes start doing it, RIGHT NOW. Mayor Jim Ardis, whom no one outside of Peoria has ever heard of, would like everyone to know that he REALLY can’t take a joke and that he will send armed police […]

Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we scrape the dumbest possible news leftovers off our overheated browser tabs, blend them into an almost-digestible slurry, and serve them up to you with a muffin and a warning to imbibe heavily. Our Prime Derp this week is actually not so much the […]

As you can see, terrible no-goodnik and Friend of Wonkette Dan Savage is brutally attacking Christian Purity again, on the Twitters, by making fun of Professional Virgin Jill Duggar. Obviously, this makes him the biggest hypocrite ever, according to the 9 fulltime employees at Twitchy. Hey, Dan Savage! Stop sneering at virginity!

The Pulitzer Prizes were announced Monday afternoon, with top honors going to The Guardian and The Washington Post for their coverage of the Edward Snowden NSA revelations. That news was largely lost on users of Twitter, however, as they all were looking at pictures of a model airplane with its cockpit inserted into a lady’s […]

Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we bring you a bunch of stories that didn’t quite merit a post of their own, but that were far too stupid to ignore altogether. Apply alcohol directly to your central processing unit as needed. Or your computer’s. For the second week in a […]

Ever had an old person walk up to you on the street and ask you a completely bizarre question, like, “Why do all the apples send moonbeams into your brain?” No? Well, doesn’t happen to us either. But at a Senate hearing yesterday, David Cohen, undersecretary of treasury for terrorism and financial intelligence, was testifying […]

A terrible thing happened yesterday at Fort Hood in Killeen, Texas, and at this point, we don’t know much about the murderer, Ivan Lopez, except that he was an Iraq vet, was being treated for depression and anxiety, and was being evaluated for possible PTSD.  Those very limited details became available a few hours after […]

Stephen Colbert jumped on the cooling ashes of the #CancelColbert nontroversy Monday, explaining that the out-of-context tweet was sent (and removed) by a Comedy Central account, not by him, but that he will nonetheless not bow to the “dark forces trying to silence my message of core conservative principles mixed with youth-friendly product placement.” It’s […]

Those hilariously non-funny satirists at the National Report have done it again, with a fake news story about Bill Murray accidentally helping to capture a bank robber in Tokyo. The story seemed just plausible enough that it was picked up by Express UK, the website for the British tabloid. Nothing too surprising about that, really; […]

Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we steam-clean our browser tabs and scrape together all the stories that weren’t worth their own posts, but were too stupid to ignore altogether. We recommend you numb yourself against the dumbassery that is sure to follow. Our Top Derp for this week comes […]

So here is your nontroversy of the afternoon: Donald Trump is furious that Barack Obama has mentioned the possibility of a terrorist nuclear attack on Manhattan, because, as he told Fox News’s Greta Van Susteren today, the President “just put a big target on Manhattan.” Damn you, Obama! If only you had kept Manhattan a […]

Barack Obama’s War on Faith continues unabated, as proven by this tweet by CNN correspondent Ben Wedeman. Gateway Pundit guest blogger Kristinn Taylor is on it! The Obama White House has committed yet another diplomatic gaffe reported CNN’s senior international correspondent Ben Wedeman on Twitter Thursday morning…. Wedeman posted a photo of the ‘rock star’ […]

Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we bring you stories that didn’t quite merit a post of their own, but that were too stupid to ignore altogether. As always, you may want to fortify yourself with whatever you believe necessary to get through the experience — we suggest a couple […]

Your president of these here United States Barack Obama visited the Ellen show today via remote, which meant that his picture weirdly floated above Ellen, twice her size, which he probably demanded because of how he is such a megalomaniac even though he is also too a weakling. Anyway, Bamz just came on Ellen to […]

We haven’t been much on the “All In With Chris Hayes” tip for our clipbait, but yesterday Hayes unpacked the delightfully terrifying and terrifyingly delightful Twitter feed of one Rupert Murdoch. Truly, we do not think anyone else is running Murdoch’s feed, because the tweets have the same level of unfiltered lunacy of Donald Trump’s […]