Tag: tv

Fine, Here Is Your Bernie Sanders On SNL Already. Are You People Happy Now?

As everyone knows, there are two objectives for any political candidate appearing on Saturday Night Live: Get your face on SNL, and do it without embarrassing yourself too badly. And don't even try to match the performance of Jesse...
They're everywhere!

Gay-Hating Wingnuts Must Stop Using Google, Drinking Coke, And Having Abortions

Every week, there's some new company making the queer-hatin' folks of our U.S. American society real mad in their bathing suit regions, for making nice-nice with the gays. Usually we hear about it from the One Million Moms, that...
HERE IS SOME SEX ADVICE, YOU GUYS.

Rush Limbaugh Mad Teenage Boys Don’t Put Out Like They Used To

Yesterday, Grandma Kaili told you Wonkers about a new CDC study that says Kids These Days are real fuckin' boring, in that they don't go under the bleachers at school and play sex games on each other, and they...
Works for media literacy too.

Wingnut Columnist: Neil DeGrasse Tyson Is A Bad Scientist, Could Someone Please Kill Him?

WordNetDaily columnist Erik "The Other Rush" Rush -- he really calls himself that -- would like to share with you some Thoughts About Science, which mostly boil down to: science is nice when it gives us flatscreen TVs and...
Listen up, you Messico losers!

Donald Trump Will Sue The Sh*t Out Of You, All Of You, Everywhere, Shut Up Is Why

Donald Trump wants ALL the millions of U.S. American dollars because there are airplanes making airplanes noises in the privately owned sky over HIS mansion. True story! CNNMoney reports that Trump has filed a lawsuit against Palm Beach County,...
He seems festive

You Are The Opitomy Of A Dumb Ass: 2014’s Greatest (Stupidest) Deleted Comments

In reviewing the year's achievements in deleted comments, we have to say we were somewhat astonished by just how many of the damned things there were. We went back and read a year's worth of Dear ShitFerBrains columns at...
Nerrrrrddddddd

President Obama Is Totally Into Science, IMPEACH!

Like it isn't bad enough that President Obama believes in things like birth control, evolution, and climate change -- now we find out the guy actually really likes science. Like a total geek: President Obama “is a science geek,” or...
Wingnuts raised hell in 1968 about this Black Jesus, too.

‘Black Jesus’ About As Popular With Pharisees As The Original

Hey, did you kidz watch that new show Thursday night, "Black Jesus," on the Adult Swim Cartoons For Stoned Grownups Teevee Channel? We did not, because we are traveling and without TiVo, and we haven't watched television in...

New Jersey Airs Network TV Commercial For Jazz-Cigarette Medicine, World Maybe Does Not End?

Good job on this ad, Medical Cannabis Network! It is actually funny! Reader, watch it! If you can't, here is the SPOILER: We join a swarthy fellow with an Orson Welles mustache who is trying to sell us some...

Jesse Jackson Shows Ted Cruz How ‘Green Eggs And Ham’ Should be Read

Last night, some weasel-faced Canadian read Green Eggs and Ham to the Senate. Here's a clip of Jesse Jackson giving the book justice on SNL after Theodore Geisel died in 1991. (It's not the full version, unfortunately; completists can...

Mom-Hating Major Networks To Show Repeats of Dumb Shows Rather Than Ann Romney’s Speech

The Mitt Romney for President 2012 campaign had a smashing idea for night one of next week's convention: Get Ann Romney to speak! She's a nice gal who "humanizes Mitt Romney," don't you know. Have you heard? Once the...

Fox News Non-Apologizes For Reporting Individual Mandate Unconstitutional

Fox News tried, it really tried, to make lies true, and to expect something so thoroughly, in the deepest crevasses of its soul, that when hearing the opposite it, it just heard its wish, its dream, namely for the...

Jeb Bush, Liberated By His Own Irrelevance, Says GOP Is ‘Short-Sighted’

Remember a very long time ago, during a Republican presidential debate last August (oh my god, TIME), when one of those moderator fellows asked the candidates whether they would reject a debt deal that required 10 dollars in spending...

Neo-Nazi Greek Politician Beats On Lady Politician On Live TV (VIDEO)

Well, this is great. During a live television debate on Thursday between a bunch of Greek politicians (its broke citizens go to the broken polls on June 17), Ilias Kasidiaris, a spokesperson for and member of the terrifyingly named...

Michelle Obama Ends War On Women Ceasefire With Disgraceful Prom Photo

Everything was going great with the women and the men, who stopped fighting against women/each other this weekend just long enough to watch 'Shark Tank' and eat a few hot dogs, but now Michelle Obama has something to say....

RNC Chairman Slanders Caterpillars, Says War On Women ‘Is A Fiction’

The war on women -- is it real? Do elected people (some of them women) really want women to be declared as pregnant when all they really have is CRAMPS? Or is it all for the woman's "SAFETY,"...