We told you last week that we were finished with the 1950s and moving into the ’60s, and we are — but by a quirk of editing, both of our history textbooks for the Christian school market have shoehorned the Kennedy administration into the very end of their chapters on the Fifties, the better to […]

Hey, Drudge and Weekly Standard, did anything happen during President Richard Milhouse Obama’s press conference with the Turkish premiere or prime minister or president or whatever? (We are not required to know who that guy is, because AMERICA.) Oh, nothing, he just CALLED OUT THE MARINES? Well that is one way to murder all of […]

Rick Perry is finally dropping out of the Republican race Thursday, and will endorse Newt Gingrich because it’s just more fun that way. He will now return in shame to Texas to command-in-chief his Burundi-sized army and obsessively read over all his old emails to Jesus for clues about why Jesus dumped him and maybe […]

In Monday night’s debate, Rick Perry made the claim that Turkey was “ruled by what many would perceive to be Islamic terrorists.” Just as bafflingly, people from as far and wide as actual Turkey and D.C. have taken time out of their busy days Tuesday to condemn Perry’s par-for-the-course proclamation. But he’s been to Turkey, […]

On a grim November day just two years ago, the recently defeated GOP candidate for vice president pardoned a turkey. And because she had yet to quit the only real job she ever had — governor of Alaska — she didn’t have all these private jets at her service, so she did the “normal for […]

In the days before YouTube, our computers were pretty safe from stuff like this. But, as slaves to audio-visual technology, we must now be exposed to moments best captured by a single photograph — as in turkey pardons of past presidencies — and then quickly forgotten. Here, President Obama again shows his cruel elitism, as […]

Fear not, patient wingnuts! SARAH PALIN knows what it feels like to wait and wait and wait and wait for a celebrity JOHN HANCOCK. She knows what it’s like to practically die from hypothermia and disappointment. Yes, she has suffered just as you have: During the carefree ’90s — pre-9/11 Alaska, when Alaskans still felt […]

Today through Saturday, September 26: You eat out at participating DC restaurants, and children all over the world, even those in the shittiest countries, will stop eating each other. [Great American Dine-Out]

Here is something fun to lighten the mood on the day before the weekend! How to explain this one … It’s sort of like if the Scissor Sisters met Omar Sharif and directed an intergalactic cruise together, with a backup singer wearing cave-lady rags. Cocaine would almost certainly be involved. This might be talking it […]

Barack Obama went to what he fancy-calls a “Muslim-majority” nation today, Turkey, to hock his “legacy assets” under the guise of “reconciliation” after years of “Overseas Contingency Operations.” In other words he gave a speech to the Turkish Parliament in which he “promoted terrorism against white Christian landowning Americans.” Everyone should thank our President for […]

Yeah so that guy who filmed Sarah Palin warbling nonsense in front of a parade of beheaded turkeys? Various news reports have said he is “an award-winning chief photographer,” and this is true. This fellow, Scott Jensen, was the National Press Photographers Association’s TV News Photojournalist of the Year — twice! And now we see […]

That funny but completely unimportant thing from last week in which Sarah Palin pardoned a turkey and then gave a teevee interview with a turkey being sliced ‘n’ diced in the background… well the American people are intent to know as much as possible about it! Early reports suggested that Palin was aware before the […]

Oh look it’s that guy from Get Carter, the one who Michael Caine finds at the racetrack wearing a sweet pair of shades! No wait, it’s a lost member of Monty Python who gave up acting for a sweet hippie chick in Haight-Ashbury and was last seen in the Mojave Desert, high on peyote and […]

HILLARY CLINTON  3:26 pm February 21, 2008

Is Turkey Not an Obama Fan?

by Jim Newell