tsa
Guess who’s pushing for these radiation/porn camera tubes in every airport, to first debase you and then kill you with cancer? Hollow-eyed death monster Michael Chertoff, former director of Homeland Security! He’s now a lobbyist for the death-porn humiliation chambers, which is why it’s very important to security — his financial security — that you [...]
I pointed out to the security officer that 50 percent of the American population has no balls (90 percent in Washington, D.C., where I live), so what is going to happen when the pat-down officer meets no resistance in the crotchal area of women? “If there’s no resistance, then there’s nothing there.” “But what about [...]
Do you enjoy having three or four obese high-school dropouts looking at you naked, through your clothes, simply because you have a plane to catch? Welcome to America! Also, pilots are getting randomly grabbed by these moronic security guards and pointed to the Naked Camera Machines. This one pilot apparently said, “Uh, no, I’m a [...]
NOW ONLY OUTLAWS WILL HAVE SNOWGLOBES: There are so many ways that snow globes can harm someone. The most obvious is that you could replace the water within with a clear water-like explosive substance, of the sort that doesn’t actually exist. You could also simply bash someone with one in the back of their skull, [...]
Americans, do you know about “millimeter wave systems”? Of course you don’t — that’s terrifying science talk. In layman’s terms, these are the giant scary scanning machines that most airports have about two of, and people are selected at random to go into them, and then the TSA agent sees you naked, without any clothes [...]
SOMEONE SAID ‘PENIS’ SO HERE IS A POST ABOUT IT: James Carville is so excited to pass through possible heightened airport security checks: “Let me buy a [security] pass … so that they can scan me and and search me and measure my penis, then let me get on the plane.” Everyone in the TSA [...]
Shocking news from the Terrorism Security Agency: All airplane terrorists would not have even existed if ONLY the TSA had crucial information from you, the person booking a flight on the Internet. What is that you say, potential terrorist? You already provide your name and your credit card and then your government-issued photo ID at [...]
Ha ha, so, funny story: a traveling Marine packed enough ammunition and explosives in his checked luggage to blow up, hmm let’s say a Pliosaur, and nobody really noticed or appeared to care until his luggage was inspected by TSA workers during a layover in Boston.Thus concluded the first incident in recorded history when TSA [...]
Is David Vitter’s dad the Pope? Does he know about the Aliens and Area 51? What explains this foul whore-soiling scumbag’s ability to evade justice? Not only did he get caught whoring via the since-suicided DC Madam’s phone records, but he was infamous in New Orleans for demanding his hookers dress him in an adult [...]
Here’s a picture we took last night, of absolutely nobody in line to see the liberal Joe Lieberman lecture Republicans at the convention. Seriously, this was at about 8 p.m. local time, at the main entrance/security checkpoint, before Fred Thompson or Lieberman gave their speeches.
