Tag: true love

Ann Romney To Obama: Please Don’t Kill Mitt With A Missile If I’m Nearby

Ann Romney is no dummy, you guys! She knows all about how much Obama loves killing all of his enemies with missiles from flying death robots. And who is the Obama Administration's most hated enemy? Well,...

Allen West Will Fake-Execute You If You Question His Devotion To Ryan Budget

Oh, good heavens, what has powerful nutball Allen West gotten himself into today? Something insane? Something creepy, perhaps? ALL OF THEM. Representative West, an actual elected official with hands on the levers of government, loves fellow representative Paul Ryan's...

BREAKING: LEVI AND BRISTOL TO PUT THE FINAL NAIL IN THE COFFIN OF HETEROSEXUAL MARRIAGE "Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston say they're engaged and hope to get married within six weeks in Alaska ... Palin and Johnston tell the...

BREAKING: LEVI AND BRISTOL BACK ON, TRUE LOVE STILL POSSIBLE

Americans are absolutely shattered over the tawdry end of the Gores' marriage, and need affirmation that love is still possible, because otherwise the whole country's going to turn to alcohol and cutting to restore meaning to life. Well,...