Tag: truck nutz

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It’s Been Another Banner Day in News About Truck Nutz

Nashville Nutz Alert operative "Ames" sends your Wonkette this delightful nature photograph of Truck Nutz roaming free and happy in the wilds of a Tennessee parking lot, for all of us to enjoy. Savor it while you can! The...

Truck Nutz and Newtonian Child Labor On the Florida Campaign Trail

Our libertarian-Bostonian correspondent is on the road in Florida, chasing the GOP clowns. Here is a video-photo dispatch from him! JACKSONVILLE -- We always feel bad for the poor interns/work-study kids who get stuck holding those goofy signs in spin...

UPDATE: South Carolina Sheriff Thrown In Jail After Issuing TRUCK NUTZ Fine

INSTANT COMEUPPANCE, BIYOTCHES. The killjoy police chief who fined a 65-year-old woman for hanging red Truck Nutz off her pickup truck turns out to be a bit of a "Joe Walsh" himself. He was tossed into the clink for...

South Carolina Launches All-Out Assault on Truck Nutz

OH COME ON, as though somehow there are people out there who don't love Truck Nutz? Judging by the number of people who sent us this tip, absolutely NO ONE in all of space/time except a humorless douchebag police...

Mitch McConnell Quits Debt Talks, Tells Obama To Just Do Whatever So GOP Can Blame Him For It Already

Ever since the fake "should we raise the debt ceiling debate" started (the answer is YES OF COURSE), the GOP has been using this fake debate as leverage to extract deep cuts from any social program not for millionaires...

Finally, Truck Nutz and Scooters Unite

We've made it to the mountaintop, dear readers. First there were Truck Nutz, the automotive accessory a certain segment of the electorate used to alert others to their tenuous hold on masculinity. Then arose the Scooter People, the Tea...

Brave Firefighter Suspended For Exercising God-Given Truck Nut Freedom

The mayor of a Long Island village has suspended its fire chief for 30 days -- because he refused to remove a crude set of plastic testicles from a fire truck. The item is a novelty $24.95 pair of "Bumpernuts"...

Canada Spills Earthquake Mess All Over Northern U.S. Border

This afternoon Canada had a socialist 5.0-magnitude earthquake all over its Eastern "provinces" of Ontario and Quebec. This being Canada, those brash, inconsiderate bastards, they couldn't keep the thing to themselves -- so for 30 seconds, Americans in states...

Oh Here’s Your iPhone Nutz, NOW STOP SENDING IT, NOT EVEN FUNNY JESUS CHRIST COME ON

Thanks, six-hundred-and-forty-four readers who sent links to the wacky new novelty item, "Truck Nutz things for your iPhone." Thanks! Got it! Oh, you wanted us to post this? Why, exactly? Was it supposed to be funny? It's not funny. When...

Texas Candy Car’s Truck Nutz Rock the Handicapped Spot

Wonkette operative "Polly M." was just hanging out at her local AutoZone parking lot in Austin when she saw America's Most Shocking Set of Truck Nutz. The Skittles, the chrome rims, the weird soccer-ball bumper testicles, what does it...

Texan Lady Sad About Those Vulgar Truck Nutz Dangling From the Bumper of Every Texan Vehicle

Here's an Ironic Dilemma of Our Times: The only people truly offended by the dumb novelty item called "Truck Nutz" live in the only places where Truck Nutz are commonplace. Conservative church ladies simply don't care for the plastic...

Hopeful GOP Health Care Lobbyists Already Setting Up Shop In Northern Marianas

Now that the House is debating the Republican health care alternative, the sweeping "BonerCare" of ancient lore, it's a good opportunity to share this amazing (and ominous -- mostly ominous!) photograph from commenter "mollymcguire," who actually lives in the...

‘Crooks And Liars’ Commenter loquaciousmusic Is Famous On Teevee!

Congratulations to veteran commenter "loquaciousmusic," a part of whose sexy comment on some stupid post from 2008 was featured on last night's The Daily Show in a segment demonstrating how fun it can be to make gay jokes about...

‘Real World DC’ Architectural Mouth-Rape Fortress Also Includes ‘Love Sacks’

Whoa, the news scoops keep coming from City Paper about the horrific plans for the Real World gloom factory on 20th St. NW: The contractors have been instructed to install frightening "Love Sacks" -- five of them, in a...