Tag Archives: trolls

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Deleted Comments Of The Week: This Is Clearly A Homo-Sexual Web-Page

Nothing classes up the joint like a top hat and monocle
Nothing classes up the joint like a top hat and monocle What a week! Our Deleted Comments queue fairly groans with vast loads of deleted idiocy, and yet, we find ourselves facing quite the conundrum: While we had enormous numbers of deleted comments, not many of them were really all that worth mocking — they were more tiresome than absurd. And yet, we will muddle through, somehow. At least our story on Ben Shapiro’s gay-panic meltdown in response to the horrific shootings in Virginia managed to elicit an eminently quotable comment from “WILLIAM H GATHERCOLE & NORAH G.” They appear to write comments as two people, and really want us to witness the power of their ALL-CAPS USERNAME. The joint Gathercole entity took issue with our highly unprofessional tone and parlance in the piece: Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: This Is Clearly A Homo-Sexual Web-Page…
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Deleted Comments Of The Week: Guy Who Murdered Kids Only A Distraction From Planned Parenthood’s Crimes!

My Little Pony: Friendship is a Plot to Steal Your Guns and Destroy Freedom
My Little Pony: Friendship is a Plot to Steal Your Guns and Destroy Freedom Our piece last week on the nice North Carolina dad who was an ardent Open Carry enthusiast (and whose Facebook page was full of pro-gun, anti-Obama, and anti-Muslim messages) who shot his two preschool-aged sons to death drew the usual bunch of Second Amendment defenders who gunsplained to us that the problem isn’t guns — it’s never guns — but it also received complaints from folks with a refreshingly new perspective, if by “refreshingly new” you mean “familiar clich├ęs that we haven’t seen in at least a week or two.” You see, kids, as would-be commenter “Valerie Emmons” informs us, we are actually huge hypocrites for even being the least bit upset about a drunk man who shot his 3- and 4-year-old sons multiple times after assaulting his wife, because we also support a women’s right to choose a legal surgical procedure: Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: Guy Who Murdered Kids Only A Distraction From Planned Parenthood’s Crimes!…
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Deleted Comments: Why Is Wonkette So Unfair To White Supremacists?

Does it violate Godwin's Law when you're talking about neo-Nazis?
Yr Wonkette was treated to a “raid” by some sad keyboard neo-nazis this week, because they objected to our disparagement of their new war-word, “Cuckservative” — that is, a conservative who’s been cuckolded by dangerous liberal tendencies like not being a white supremacist. They didn’t try anything quite so ambitious as a denial of service attack on our servers; rather, a bunch of wingnuts from a white-power blog’s comments invited themselves over to post comments on our article so they could set us dumb liberals straight. And thus they would win the Internet! Read more on Deleted Comments: Why Is Wonkette So Unfair To White Supremacists?…
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Deleted Comments: A Real Marine In National Security Warns Wonkette To Leave Iran

OK, so maybe it's not THIS Marine...
Funny how it all works out: Even during a week when our little mommyblog, recipe hub, and ugly vile little snark mob was brought low by server issues for a day and then some, we had an astonishing number of deleted comments, mostly thanks to 1) an idiot dentist with blood lust (no, not Jack Nicholson in Little Shop of Horrors OR Lawrence Olivier in Marathon Man) and 2) A few really determined trolls on other stories. Let’s get straight to the latter, a garrulous fellow simply named “Ben,” who warned us that Morgan Freeman is lying to America about the Iran nuclear deal: Read more on Deleted Comments: A Real Marine In National Security Warns Wonkette To Leave Iran…
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Deleted Comments Of The Week: The Holocaust Was A Hoax, Martial Law In Texas Is Real

Does it violate Godwin's Law when you're talking about neo-Nazis?
Lots of lovely deleted comments for you this week, many of them in reply to our piece about David Cole, the Holocaust denier who’s found an exciting new career denying climate change (he thinks climate scientists need to be tried for treason or something). Some of the comments were about what you’d expect, like this succinct dismissal of the entire topic, from one “boris_batonov,” who simply wrote: “so you retards believe in the holohoax” — and while we’re offended by his historical illiteracy and terrible punctuation, what really chafes is a username that insults a great cartoon character. Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: The Holocaust Was A Hoax, Martial Law In Texas Is Real…
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Deleted Comments Of The Week: Poverty Is A Myth Because Poors Are Fat And Lazy

Dear Editor: I have had it up to here with playing second fiddle to a bunch of stupid marshmallow horses...
We got a bumper crop of idiots in the comments this week, for some reason — our fault, really, since Yr Wonkette had to go and stir up trouble by writing stuff about the poors, the blacks, the gays, and the Duggars — add your own punchline. Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: Poverty Is A Myth Because Poors Are Fat And Lazy…
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Deleted Comments: This One’s About Vaccines And Vaginas!

Vacation plan: Clean apartment, finish reading that Twain biography. Vacation reality: Booze & MLP fanfic
Oh, Wonkers, we have some beautiful deletia for you this week! Looks to us like some people have really been working overtime in the Derp Mines to bring us this fine assortment of stupidity. For starters, we have this thought-provoking bit of turnabout from “John Smith” (Real name: “Bob Johnson”), who understands that Bobby Jindal just wants to protect Liberty from the homos. Just think about this — would you libs really be so hot on forcing Christians to provide services to gay people if it also meant that gay people would have to serve people with whom they have traditionally been at Culture War? Read more on Deleted Comments: This One’s About Vaccines And Vaginas!…
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Deleted Comments Of The Week: You Sheepy Sheeple Are Such Sheep!

To The Management: Please correct this image. I would never use Courier. On second thought, never mind. You'd just replace it with Comic Sans.
We have a Very Special Men And Women of Few Words edition of Dear ShitFerBrains for you today, because due to some odd alignment of the planets this week, we didn’t receive a single long, painful screed that ranged over everything from Benghazi to water fluoridation. Just a lot of staccato bursts of derp. And so the question must be asked: Is our trolls learning? Hahahaha, who are we kidding, of course not (As always, all spelling, spacing, and punctuation is reproduced verbatim). Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: You Sheepy Sheeple Are Such Sheep!…
  Unfair!

Michelle Malkin Outraged: Twitter Jailing Conservatives Like They Are Japanese-Americans

Our thoughts exactly
BREAKING EXCLUSIVE MUST CREDIT TWITCHY! The liberal-biased interwebs are putting conservatives in Twitter jail, maybe (or maybe not) but probably (but probably not), just for being conservatives, OH NOES! Michelle Malkin, conservative keyboard-banging hero and founder of the the site with NINE PAID STAFFERS (or, ugh, maybe even more by now) who collect random tweets, mostly by Pat Sajak, and call it “the news wire of the 21st century,” is on to you, Twitter! Read more on Michelle Malkin Outraged: Twitter Jailing Conservatives Like They Are Japanese-Americans…
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Deleted Comments Of The Week: Rand Paul Is A Genius, You Morons!

To the editors: I liked the old library better.
Today, an abbreviated Dear Shitferbrains, seeing as how Yr Doktor Zoom has Ebola again and also needs to do his taxes like the rest of the One Percent. Not surprisingly, we heard from a lot of butthurt Rand Paul fans this week, most of whom wanted to point out that a journalist’s job is to ask a question and then write down the answers, and not to keep asking her question when Rand Paul interrupts her to tell her that her question is not a good one. “John 440” was simply aghast that we would even write about such a non-news moment: Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: Rand Paul Is A Genius, You Morons!…
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Deleted Comments Of The Week: Oh Yeah Wonket? Well YOU’RE An Abortion!

Dear Sir or Madame: I am outraged by the lack of variety in the .gifs on this blog!
This week’s crop of deleted comments made us feel a bit nostalgic, since a couple of them employ a rightwing rhetorical trope that we first noticed when we still read the local news-paper while listening to Fleetwood Mac on the Victrola. It’s the simplest possible sort of non sequitur: just take any current event and point out that the Scourge Of Abortion is far worse. “I don’t see why the plane crash in ____ is news when hundreds of babies are slaughtered daily…” “Your article on the Armenian Genocide reminded me that Americans are happy to deny their own genocide, legal since 1973…” “How can your reviewer complain about Ishtar when a true abomination takes place in Planned parenthood clinics every day?” So yeah, we got a couple of those this week. Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: Oh Yeah Wonket? Well YOU’RE An Abortion!…
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Deleted Comments Of The Week: Why Are We Being Anti-Semitic To Sarah Palin?

Scootaloo is a skateboard punk rocker. Let's hope she ends up saner than Michelle Shocked.
The Deleted Comments Hopper was extra-full this week, largely because we hit on a convergence of topics in one post: we wrote about the Palin family and guns at the same time, and that combination summoned the angerbears from the depths. Also, we suggested that not all American Jews agree with Congressschmuck Steve King, who carries so much water for AIPAC that he has calves the size of challas, and that brought us some real winners too. Heck, we don’t even have room to mention the anti-vaxxer who said that criticizing paranoia about vaccines is the “type of attitude is what forced people into internment camps and concentration camps,” which is really too bad, because we wish we could have mentioned that. Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: Why Are We Being Anti-Semitic To Sarah Palin?…
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Deleted Comments Of The Week: We Are Illiterate Illegal Parasites In Prison. Science Fact!

Haha, 'COORS'
Since Disqus has brought us a bunch of new commenters (Hi! Welcome To The Monkeyhouse! Play nice!), we’d just like to ‘splain why we moderate comments in the first place, instead of allowing unfettered Free Speach: It’s because we are big believers in the First Amendment, which gives us the right to run our little mommyblog/recipe hub/Pony appreciation society however the hell we want to. It’s our parlor, and if we choose not to invite someone in because they’re intent on muddying up the carpet and shitting on the credenza, or even if we don’t like their Gadsden Flag t-shirt, that’s our business. Don’t like it? Do some Free Enterprise and offer the Editrix an obscene amount of money to buy the site so you can change how things work. (We hear she’ll only sell if the staff get some pretty impressive golden parachutes.) Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: We Are Illiterate Illegal Parasites In Prison. Science Fact!…
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Deleted Comments Of The Week: Shoot-Out At The Not-Okay Corral

No, *you're* the most basic of jokes.
Oh, it has been a busy week in Deleted Comments land! Thanks to our switchover to Disqus, the comments are a bit more Wild West-y than they had been — in Olden times, new commenters had to be approved, but now, Yr Moderators have to patrol the dusty streets and clear them of miscreants who shamble into view. Happily, you Wonkers are all deputized to help us keep our comments section a happy Radical Liberal Secularist Leftist Libunatic playground as well, via the “flag” option that appears when you move your mouse over any comment, like so: Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: Shoot-Out At The Not-Okay Corral…