* Sci-Fi author David Brin tours Capitol — yells at police that confiscate his tri-corder, “You don’t know what you’re doing! My work must continue!” [Conservative Futurist] MORE »

It’s hot, and our building’s AC is down for the day. So we’re kind of miserable. But we take solace in the fact that we don’t have to lead tours of the Capitol. Some folks aren’t that lucky. One of those unlucky folks is (or was) our very own Anonymous Hill Staffer, who’s checking in today with another installment in his glorious Quixotic quest to answer every single question about working on the Hill ever.

After the jump, ageism, mostly, with a dash of racism and a the usual smattering of nepotism.

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Ask a Hill Staffer

Our anonymous Hill Staffer works hard, play hard, and answers your questions with the absolute minimum effort required.

Today, in between backrubs for John Conyers and stalking the mysterious new Representative Paula Vaughn, he tells ya’ all about finding a job, eating lunch, and how to dress to impress. Keep those questions coming, people — he almost had to do real work today.

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Hey, at least one House employee listened to our demand that you send us vulgarisms while yer supposed to be working: MORE »

Washington tourists in August: Clearly, the rejects of the vacationing world. An article in today’s WaPo shows how our subway system, designed to thwart invasion and attack, also cleverly repels a more pernicious presence:

With no public transportation experience, George said, “we didn’t know what we were supposed to do.” The first challenge was simply buying a Farecard. “That ticket machine is awful,” she said. “We finally figured it out by just pushing all the buttons.”

Of course, that’s also how Americans vote. The real tragedy? The family still thinks they’re in New York. The article also highlights a rather Sartrean visitor Metro dilemma, quoting a confused passenger, “Which way is the exit? How do you get out of the building?” Ah, yes, we’ve heard of the tourist mole people, trapped underground in world they didn’t build and don’t understand. But, frankly, as long as they stand to the right, damn it, we don’t care. MORE »