Wonkette

Pic by Liz Gorman, taken back when people were pretending to give a shit about Denmark for some reason. MORE »

Tony Blankley supports the Danes, hopes they stay in Denmark.

Breathless update! Tony Blankley writes in to set the record straight — unlike those other immigrants, Tony was pronounced A-OK by Uncle Sam!

You correctly cite my opposition to illegal immigration, but chastise me for not then deporting myself back to England–from whence I came. Your error, pardonable though it may be, is to assume I am an illegal immigrant. Otherwise, of course, your entire comment would be demagoguery of the rankest order–which heaven forfend it surely couldn’t be.

We point out only that Mr. Buchanan seeks a much tighter quota even on so-called “legal” immigration, and he surely would warn us of the dangers to our shared Euro-Xtian-Caucasian culture posed by this tea-drinking, chimbley-sweeping, bespoke-suited terror.

Blankley’s full, charming, Katherine Harris-referencing email, after the jump. Read it aloud in your best James Mason impression!

Significantly less breathless update: Eric Pfeiffer writes in to assure us that he is decidedly not an “all-around nice guy.” Don’t you people have a money-losing paper to put out?

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Did you hear? Pat Buchanan has a new book out. It’s called “State of Emergency: Your Children Will Eat Only Tamales and Sing ‘La Cucaracha’ All Day While Learning About Godless Pagan Aztecs and Worshiping Pancho Villa and It’s All Your Fault.” In case you hadn’t heard, the Washington Times has been kind enough to run not one, but two high-profile pieces on this important new piece of fear-mongering. MORE »

On this, the most pointless of patriotic holidays, we pause to… well, do something. Something flag-related, probably, but we don’t really know what. We’d think barbeques, but it’s a Wednesday and the weather’s kinda crappy. What kind of patriotic holiday is allowed to happen on a Wednesday? And we don’t even get a half-day? Fuck the flag, man. This is bogus.

All-media Flag Day Coverage Roundup, after the jump. You know you’re excited.

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You guys got your famous-for-DC minor media figure stalking booklets handy? Good. Let’s begin. MORE »

Ten kinds of crazy going on in this Chicago Tribune piece about Reverend Sun Myung Moon and his, uh, stranglehold on the sushi industry. Yeah, we didn’t know that one either. So, as the tipster who brought this piece to our attention noted, every California roll you eat helps subsidize the quality, money-losing journalism of the Washington Times. And who knew cornering an industry could sound so simple? MORE »

A well-placed fern adds a touch of nature to your giant, panel-dwarfing doric columns.

Busy week so far for Wonkette. Last night saw us at some sort of weird auditorium/ballroom thing attached to the EPA (no one knew what purpose the space served, except for hosting panel discussions in a fancier-than-usual setting) for The Week Opinion Awards (in Partnership with The Aspen Institute). It was a blast, of course, though we admit that we don’t remember the awards bit, or the round-table bit, or the speeches, as we were having way too much fun schmoozing and drinking. We’re sure the winners were very deserving, though. Despite our not winning.

And boy, what a star-studded occasion it was. Froomkin! Arianna Huffington! Sid Blumenthal! Froomkin! Our full (hazily-reconstructed, actually) report, complete with exclusive photos from Liz Gorman, Intrepid Girl Reporter, after the jump.

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Last Thursday night, while one-half of Wonkette was appearing on Countdown with Keith Olbermann, the other half was listening to Olbermann get mocked, at the gala dinner of the Media Research Center.

How’s that for objectivity? Wonkette: Fair and Balanced!

In case you’re not familiar with it, the MRC is a conservative watchdog organization deoted to “documenting, exposing and neutralizing liberal media bias.” In a nutshell, think of it as a Media Matters for right-wingers — and with cleaner bathrooms.

Cal Thomas likes his liberal journalists shaken, not stirred.

The highlight of the dinner was the presentation of the “DisHonor Awards,” bestowed upon “the most outrageously biased liberal reporters of 2005.” The awards were followed by a special tribute to the American military.

After the jump, a more detailed account of the evening’s festivities.

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* Stake wielders: disarm. Only upside-down American flags can destroy Michelle Malkin. [Michelle Malkin]
* Captain Ed waxes philosophical over the upside-down flag photos and considers who the object of “the illegals’ ” loyalty is. [Captain's Quarters]
* Mark Noonan analyzes two immigration opinions (one from Tony Blankley, who does not blog) and concludes: Pissing off Hispanics won’t preclude your midterm GOP victory. [Blogs for Bush]
* Roger Simon wonders what’s not to love about being a rich white guy. [Roger L. Simon]
* Kos contributor DarkSyde can’t get behind the guest worker program, as everything Republicans touch turns to wage-raping gold. [Daily Kos]

• The blogosphere has been dominated by Domenech’s demise. Our coverage is collected here (scroll down).
• Candid photographs of Katherine Harris: they’re as addictive as crack, and as dangerous too.
• Speak incoherently and carry a big pen: President is now the longest-sitting president since Jefferson not to exercise his veto.
• A fire breaks out in the CNN studio — probably arson by a jilted lover. As for the “suspicious package” at the White House, let’s blame it on the French.
• Embroiled in the latest “to blog or not to blog” pseudo-scandals: Washington Times opinion page editor Tony Blankley, and Newark mayoral candidate Cory Booker.
• Some of our subjects here at Wonkette can get so sensitive. Lighten up, guys!
• Supreme Court justices can get so childish. It’s all fun and games until someone breaks a gavel.
• Rummy slaps around MoDo: “If you believe everything you read in Maureen Dowd, you better get a life.” We don’t know whose side to take in this one.
• Career advice for radio talk show hosts: don’t call the Secretary of State a racial epithet. She may not be the next NFL commissioner, but she can still kick your ass.
• Dick Cheney’s diva-licious demands, revealed.
• Last week was your chance to buy a piece of history: Duke Cunningham’s loot hit the auction block.
• President Bush goes on a candor offensive, taking unscripted questions from town-hall audiences — and even Helen Thomas.
• Congressmen get to have all the fun: free booze, plus trips to Colorado and Scotland. What’s not to like?

(Picture courtesy Liz Gorman, Intrepid Girl Reporter) MORE »

* “Hungry” and “angry” Dems star in Steve Benen’s so far unscripted and plot-less Democratic presidential campaign. [The Carpetbagger Report]
* DarkSyde likes his Dems — and unregistered’s — even angrier. Vote for us, Joe Undecided, because Karl Rove hates you. Um, plot development? [DailyKos]
* Tony Blankley drank his latte, watched an MLK Jr. clip, tore Tuesday off his Norman Vincent Peale calendar, and smugly blogged for despondent congressmen types. [Real Clear Politics]
* Port controversy, violent hurricane, bloody civil war with no foreseeable end: we got that goin’ for us, which is nice. [The Jawa Report]
* If you’re not angry enough to vote, maybe it’s because April 15th isn’t here yet. John Irons’ take on tax reform (alternatively: “tax reform”) — unlike the empty promises of rap mogul PSA’s — will actually make you die. [Think Progress]