You know who sucks? Poor jobless hungry people in America, that’s who! The famous wingnut blog “The Drudge Report” got some GOP people very, very excited because Drudge posted something suggesting the government spent $1.2 million to purchase “two pounds of ham.” TALK ABOUT PORK SPENDING, HEY-O! But, according to sad pooh-bear agriculture secretary Tom Vilsack, “the contract in question purchased 760,000 pounds of ham for $1.19 million, at a cost of approximately $1.50 per pound.” MORE »

Democratic Superstar Tom Vilsack nearly won the nomination, until he dropped out in … what, 2006? No, it was February 2007 — almost two years ago! And he endorsed Hillary. So she paid off his campaign debt, which wasn’t really very much as his campaign consisted solely of old props from a local high-school musical version of 1984. MORE »

March 26: Tom Vilsack endorses Hillary Clinton.
March 27: “Sen. Clinton To Pay Off Vilsack’s Campaign Debt” MORE »

Did you hear? Tom Vilsack, the lovable plain-spoken totalitarian furry who was once our next president until he realized he had no money and no one knew who he was just endorsed Hillary Clinton! This is the first sentence of his email: MORE »

As far as sight gags go, Tom Vilsack was a dream candidate. We already miss him so very much, even if everybody else pretty much hates him: MORE »

After a long successful run of endorsing winners like George McGovern, Walter Mondale, Al Gore and John Kerry, the magazine Rolling Stone implied back in November that Tom Vilsack might survive with a little buzz help from Wonkette. MORE »

Former Gov. Tom Vilsack (D-Iowa) is expected to drop out of the 2008 presidential race on Friday with an announcement set for later in the day, according to sources both in Washington and Iowa.

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JohnMcCain.com relaunched today, and it looks like WALNUTS! is trying to give Tom Vilsack a run for his money in the “unnerving design” department. While Vilsack trades in totalitarian motifs, McCain prefers a dark neo-noir kinda thing, with just a hint of the dictatorial. And a huge, scary picture of him staring at you in great suspicion with angry eyes and clenched teeth. Ok, ok, we’ll vote for you! Just please let our family go, they’re not the ones you want! MORE »

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These sightings always bring more questions than answers. Is Tom Vilsack so hard up for publicity that he’ll sit in a window scarfing burgers to get noticed? What makes George Allen think he’s still a member of Congress? Is James Carville sane? Does Donald Rumsfeld need a lawyer for all the reasons we think he does? If Ted Kennedy can get his dog to follow his commands, how come no one else does? Is Chris Matthews sane? Has Norah O’Donnell been watching too much Godfather II? Did Tucker Carlson rub one out to Miss America after their lunch? Keep reading to see what’s making us wonder about this stuff, plus a former congressman who travels with the kind of luggage you don’t carry if you want to get your gayness fixed.

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The Democrats are having a grand old time at their Retreat today — telling ghost stories, staying up late, falling backwards into each other’s arms — so MSNBC is doing what they do best: wall-to-wall political coverage. MORE »