Gross: “Former U.S. Rep. Tom Tancredo appears to be inching closer to getting into the Colorado gubernatorial race. While he has yet to formally declare his candidacy or fill out paperwork with the secretary of state’s office, the Littleton Republican on Thursday told a Westword reporter he ‘fully intends to run.’” Watch his first “spot” above! [Denver Post]

There is no reason, ever, to invite racist ex-Congressman failure Tom Tancredo onto any television show, or at least the political ones. So thank you Tom Tancredo for graciously acknowledging your unimportance and leaving the set mid-interview! MORE »

• TANCREDO RACIST DUDE IS LIKE FOUR: Marcus Epstein, the executive director of Tom Tom Tancredo and Bay Buchanan’s PAC, Team America — *ahem* HAHAHAHA like the movie — and also the executive director of Pat Buchanan and Bay Buchanan’s (other) PAC, The American Cause, is going to law school this fall, to karate chop and shout the n-word at more black ladies! And Bay Buchanan says that Epstein was a 21-year-old at the time of the 2007 incident, meaning he is now, what, NINE? Donate money to this young clown’s various racist groups! [Washington Independent]

Surprise, surprise: “On July 7, 2007, at approximately 7:15 p.m. at Jefferson and M Street, Northwest, in Washington, D.C., defendant was walking down the street making offensive remarks when he encountered the complainant, Ms. [REDACTED], who is African-American. The defendant uttered, ‘Nigger,’ as he delivered a karate chop to Ms. [REDACTED]’s head.” [Washington Independent]

Mexican-hating hill troll Tom Tancredo vanished from America the day Barack Obama became the black president with two mommies (Hawaii and Kansas). MORE »

A transition of power, combined with the crumbling economy, leaves America very vulnerable to the Terrorists. It is very clear to them, the Terrorists, that we do not have our shit together, at all. We have three presidents and 42 cents of real wealth; we grow a lot of corn. If you were a Terrorist looking at this, you’d just want to fucking bomb it, right? This is why we should have elected Republicans, America, because they know two things: (1) camels are from the Middle East and (2) filthy Mexicans are always sneaking into our country and then giving AIDS to our children. And yesterday two camels were seen wandering around a Mexican border city, trying to blend in, acting all cool, keeping it real discreet-like. It’s pretty clear, then, that the Arab Terrorists are coming from Mexico to, uh, eat yr brains. MORE »

Everyone’s favorite racist presidential candidate from Colorado, Rep. Tom Tancredo, is responding to the Pope’s Tour d’America by… well how is he responding? Let’s do the math: Tom Tancredo’s only issue is illegal Mexicans; illegal Mexicans are Catholic; Catholics perform Pope’s bidding… The Pope’s bidding is telling the Mexicans to enter the United States. Tom Tancredo hates the Pope! [Denver Post]

We cannot write a better introduction than this: “A town in South America is living in fear after several sightings of a ‘creepy gnome’ that locals claim stalks the streets at night. The midget — which wears a pointy hat and has a distinctive sideways walk — was caught on video last week by a terrified group of youngsters.” This sidling wicket goblin, who is terrorizing Argentinian Mexicans, made one teenager “so scared after seeing that thing that we had to take him to the hospital.”

Hmm… a hobbit gnome terrorizing illegals? This is no mystery at all. MORE »

Thanks to the Young Turks for making the video that will heal America: a retrospective of our dearly departed Republican candidates. God, these guys were fun. Fortunately, Mike Huckabee and Mitt Romney will probably run again in four or eight years, and those candidacies will probably launch in a few months. In the meantime, vote in our poll for which monster you miss the most. MORE »

Did you have a fun weekend? We sure didn’t, because Team Wonkette is way up in New Hampshire covering this most precious of our precious freedoms, the New Hampshire Primary Campaign! Wonkette’s Jim Newell and Liz Glover have already had so many Democratic and Republican adventures.

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So guess who Camp Romney sent last night to SPIN for him in the SPIN ZONE? Why former presidential candidate and current racist Tom Tancredo, that’s who! Although he claims that if he had some Messican in him, he would be happy about it. But then wouldn’t we have to deport him?

Putting to rest any remaining speculation that he is completely delusional about his place on the American political scene, Congressman Tom Tancredo dropped his bid for the Presidency, saying he realized he wasn’t going to win Iowa. He told Neil Cavuto “We accomplished everything we set out to do, except win the Presidency,” because he saw Giuliani running a border security commercial He’s throwing his “support” behind the illegal-immigrant employing, Mexican Mormon descended Mitt Romney. [CNN]

Updated after the jump with a video clip from his Cavuto interview, so you can cry along with the Minutemen who still don’t trust Huckabee to shoot enough Mexicans to make a difference. MORE »

The Federal Election Commission approved $19 million in matching funds for seven candidates today. Among notables, John Edwards received $8.8 million, and WALNUTS! got what we assume to be an extremely valuable $5.8 million. Huzzah. Most interesting, however, is that Dodd and Biden each received around $1 million, while Tom Tancredo — who is dropping out of the race today (presser at 3 p.m. ET!) — got $2.1 million. So a big wtf there, unless the FEC is playing a prank by giving him 2.1 million pesos instead. [Politico]