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Posts Tagged ‘tom cruise’

Rumors On The Internets: Strokin’ To The East, Strokin’ To The West

Friday, August 25th, 2006
  • The Osama and Kola story comes to the big screen - think “Pretty Woman meets Midnight Express.” [TPMmuckraker]

  • Limbaugh guest host believes racial slurs good enough for Stanley Kubrick are good enough for him. [Media Matters]
  • They get moral points for trying, but now Time Inc. is giving up and going back to the grey haired fans that adore them. [Romenesko]
  • Tom Cruise knows the Germans are suckers for some totalitarianism and he wants in. [The Swamp]
  • You thought S.R. Sidarth uses his free time to help orphans and shut-ins? Nope, he spends “at least a few hours a week jacking off to Internet porn,” just like you . [Riehl World View]
  • If New York Democratic gubernatorial candidate Tom Suozzi had any chance of winning, he wouldn’t be wasting time with any of our punch-drunk family members. [Gawker]
  • New “Google Soapbox” debuts, has conservative slant. [MoJo]
  • Federal Air Marshal Service drops dress code, fearing it endangered marshals cover — it’s not the clothes guys, it’s the mustaches. [Captain's Quarters]

Richard Armitage Opens Diplomatic Ties With Xenu, Galactic Confederacy

Wednesday, August 23rd, 2006

armitagewoodward.jpgRichard Armitage, formerly of the State Department, is now more or less outed as the first guy to tell the first reporter who Valerie Plame worked for. Much, much, much more interesting: WTF was he doing meeting with TOM CRUISE the SAME DAY? Along with two Church of Scientology bigwigs? We demand the lapdog press look into this. MORE »


Gossip Roundup: Livin’ With No Chairs

Tuesday, August 15th, 2006
  • Page Six: A Hamptons fundraiser for Sen. Hillary Clinton, featuring an acoustic Jon Bon Jovi concert, went bad last week when organizers neglected to provide chairs for the guests. “It wasn’t done Hamptons-style,” said one social X-ray. [NYP]
  • Inside The Beltway: Dick Cheney heads out to Montana to campaign for our pal Sen. Conrad Burns. The forecast calls for photo-ops with guns, lots of swearing, and at least one heart attack. [ href="http://www.washingtontimes.com/national/20060815-010120-4269r_page2.htm">WT]

  • Rush & Molloy: Leave it to Joe DiMaggio to be one of the first to peg Tom Cruise as a wackjob. More items on the ol’ Yankee Clipper, please! Who cares if he’s been dead for seven years? [ href="http://www.nydailynews.com/news/gossip/story/443487p-373515c.html">NYDN]

MORE »


Krauthammer: Viet What?

Friday, July 7th, 2006

It’s been a slow news week, so this morning I was all, like, OMG, do I really have to read the entire new Charles Krauthammer column in the Washington Post to eke out an item? Happily, no! All you have to do is get one line in to discover that in Krauthammerland there were no significant wars for, like, most of the 20th century:

1861. 1941. 2001. Our big wars — and the war on terrorism ranks with the big ones — have a way of starting in the first year of a decade. Supreme Courts, which historically have been loath to intervene against presidential war powers in the midst of conflict, have tended to give the president until mid-decade to do what he wishes to the Constitution in order to win the war.

Interesting opener, isn’t it? What about that war that had Loretta Swit and Alan Alda in it? I seem to remember that one got totally good ratings. And there was a later one, too, I’m pretty sure, and it had awesome guest stars like Tom Cruise and Christopher Walken and Martin Sheen. No? Pffft, Charles Krauthammer doesn’t want to hear about your girly wars. MORE »


Metro Section: Of Busters and the Busted

Friday, May 12th, 2006

* Sure is gonna suck to be working at the Dupont Krispy Kreme this week. [Metroblogging DC] MORE »


More Breaking News: The Apocalypse Is Near

Wednesday, April 19th, 2006

Gossip Roundup: Whodonit?

Thursday, February 16th, 2006

* Reliable Source: Bill Clinton and Alan Greenspan lunched at the Four Seasons. . . Mike McCurry admits apathy on the Tom Cruise-Katie Holmes drama. [WP]
* Under the Dome: Sen. Jim Talent (R-Mo.) turns against his roommate, Sen. Sam Brownback (R-Kan.), over stem cell legislation. . . Rep. John Boehner (R-Ohio) has heard every boner joke. . . Senators to star in “comedic whodunit” production for charity. [The Hill]
* Rush & Molloy: Cheney may have been trying to cover up the presence of Pamela Willeford, ambassador to Switzerland, at the hunt. [NYDN]


George Bush and Tom Cruise Starring in

Monday, November 14th, 2005

It almost seems criminally easy using the ingredients of Tom Cruise, Scientology and Karl Rove to tell a joke. But the real tragedy is the lack of a good punch line. MORE »