Man, the inauguration, remember that? All sorts of famous people went to Washington D.C. to see the most famous celebrity of all, Michelle Obama. Wonkette readers spotted such elusive figures as “Paul Bengala,” a rare tiger-pundit hybrid, as well as “Matt Laurer,” a retired wrestler and morning talk show host. You also saw legitimate celebrities such as Tom Brokaw, Kurtis Blow, and Miss France. Most importantly, Kev-O-Tron and SayItWithWookies got to hang out with each other in “real life,” which is just adorable. Details after the jump.

Have you left your basement recently and seen somebody sort of famous, preferably a person kind of related to politics? Send your reports to tips@wonkette.com with the subject line “Wonk’d.” MORE »

“Well Tom Brokaw, heh, I’m disappointed about Colin Powell endorsing that Democrat, but I have FIVE Secretary of States in my pocket too, nyah nyah, and good ones at that — Henry Kissinger, Jim Baker, Larry Eagleburger… Al Haig… heh heh… uhhhhhhhhhhhh… you ever met Al, Tom?… fuck… Tom Brokaw was the fifth… no no no not Brokaw, he’s just some plumber I met in Ohio… fuck… seriously fuck my life… Colin Powell was the fif… oh no he endorsed Bono… was it Bono endorsed me?… who Bono is I have no clue whatsoever… Ah yes, Barack Obama was the fifth Secretary of State to endorse me, to answer your question Mr. Cronkite.” [YouTube/TPM]

Seriously, what was up with that super boring debate last night? John McCain was supposed to call Barack Obama a terrorist pal, and then Barack Obama was supposed to say “Hey man that is just wrong” and rip off McCain’s testicles and sauté them gently before feeding them to Tom Brokaw with un sauce béarnaise which is precisely how an elitist is supposed to confront a grizzled old war hero in a Town Hall. Instead we got a lot of respectful disagreement, which was dull. Sure, the reaction last night was bad enough. But witness this morning’s sad collection of headlines: MORE »

The New Great Depression hobo pictured here is Joe Biden, getting on the hobo train from Washington to Delaware to tend to his adult children. Joe Biden therefore cannot debate tonight, so lil’ old Hopey will have to debate against the old fart in his place. Who can pretend he will fix the economy more to these town hall people? Are any of them hot? No they are fat, and Barack Obama will drop air bombs on them or whatever is it Palin says. (Here are Part I and Part II.) MORE »

A week and a half ago NBC newsman and Meet the Press moderator Tim Russert died, and the earth stopped in its orbit and let out a wild yawp of despair for the most wonderful person who ever lived. Speculation quickly ensued about who would replace Russert in a job that he alone among all living humans was uniquely suited to do: sit in a chair and ask politicians questions. And now we know who will host Meet the Press until the “election,” which will be called off at the last minute when we start bombing Iran. It’s Tom Brokaw! MORE »

We have read this elitist New Yorker profile of your annoying loudmouth boyfriend Keith Olbermann and, like most profiles of MSNBC personalities, it confirms everything you learned about current MSNBC dynamics during the first five minutes of its Iowa caucus coverage. MORE »

Tom Brokaw said “ass” tonight, and he should be fired from whatever job he has.

Hey Eugene Robinson, Joe Scarborough says, why don’t you go “Tom Brokaw” yourself, you gay little wicket goblin. Zing! Talk about getting DEFENESTRATED BY PROFESSIONALS.

* Reliable Source: George and Laura Bush get grilled on the tough subjects: Jenna, Jenna’s engagement, etc….Woodbridge native Eunice Omole makes the cut for The Apprentice Africa. [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Roundup of important people’s holiday hot spots and office decor…John Boehner’s got some fashion tips. [Examiner]
* Shenanigans: Mike Huckabee is not always a nice guy. [Politico]
* The Sleuth: Larry Craig is all that remains of The Singing Senators. [WP]
* Page Six: Don Imus thinks Tom Brokaw is a pussy. [NYP]
* Rush & Molloy: Bill Clinton stays informed via 24. [NYDN]

As Drudge so cruelly notes, Washington Post obituary writer J.Y. Smith died nearly a year before he reported on Gerald Ford’s tragic death in today’s paper. How did Joe Smith do it? Did he return from Beyond the Grave, possibly to help the ghost of James Brown in killing the 93-year-old ex-prez? MORE »

Springtime in the city, and everybody is out grubbing. This week in Wonk’d finds Bill Clinton, feasting like a king, er, president; Justice Samuel Alito, chowing like it was his constitutional right; and Michael Chertoff, securing some risotto. Also spotted: Steve Carell, filming a new movie; Tom Brokaw, picking up some workout threads; and Grover Norquist, doing the shimmy-shimmy-shake. All this and more, of course, after the jump.

Loyal readers, you have supplied us with a bounty of celebrity sightings this week. Take advantage of the warm season, and go out and spot more people that may or may not want to be spotted. Then send the info to us via email, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (along with the name of the spotted celeb). Thanks!

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* Reliable Source: Bush will divert Air Force One today to vote in the Texas primary. . . David Boies‘ wife chartered two planes to bring 50 of his best friends –including Tom Brokaw, Charlie Rose, Ted Olsen, Walter Isaacson, Tom Friedman, Ben Bradlee, Sally Quinn and Margaret Carlson– to Vegas for his surprise 65th birthday party. . . Alan Greenspan turned 80 yesterday; book advance could reach $8m. . . George Stephanopoulos gets manicures. . . Jenna Bush dined at the Capital Grille on Saturday. . . Rep. Ed Markey (D-Mass.) attended the Oscars. . . Martin Sheen seen praying at St. Stephen’s Church. [WP]
* Under the Dome: Sen. Robert Byrd (D-W.Va.) has cast 17,532 roll-call votes. [The Hill]
* Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Katie Holmes‘ character in “Thank You for Smoking” was inspired by Maureen Dowd. [NYDN]

• Reliable Source: Two lawmakers are injured during charity football game. [WP]
• Rush & Molloy: O’Reilly calls for “full-body search” of legal pundit: “You’re a good-looking girl. I mean, if you haven’t seen [Lis Wiehl] on TV, she’s a good-looking blond.”. . . Tom Brokaw: “This is a time when those of us who care about science and Darwin have to take a stand.” [NYDN]
• Liz Smith: Lewis Lapham: “I’ve arrived at the point where I would prefer to read Machiavelli than listen to Karl Rove.”. . . Bill Clinton: “I always figure when somebody goes after your motives, they’re on their last leg, because they actually think you’re doing something good that’s gonna have good consequences. Attacking somebody’s motives is the last refuge of somebody who’s on the short end of the stick.” [NYP]