July 23, 2014
Oh how SHOCKING! We have just confirmed, via video, that crazy things have been coming out of Todd Akin’s mouth for many years now. For example, did you know that Todd Akin’s daughter writes science fiction stories about a dystopian future wherein child care is widely available and administered with efficiency, and that Todd Akin […]
When Republican consultant Kellyanne Conway told Todd “Legitimate Rape” Akin to be more like David Koresh — the cult leader in Waco whose standoff with the ATF led to the death of 80 of his followers and himself — apparently, Todd Akin listened! So how did Todd Akin set his compound on fire today? Oh […]
Todd “Legitimate Rape” Akin is back in the Missouri Senate race … because he never left it, son. Having weathered the storm caused by the liberal media pretending he thinks vaginas are washing machines for rape sperm (truth: he thinks they are car washes for rape sperm), Todd Akin now has to figure out how […]
Here is a pressing question that might be keeping you up nights, particularly if you live in whatever district in Missouri Todd Akin (R-Ladiesman) represents: What if you want to tell Todd Akin how much he sucks? How do you know he will listen to you and absorb what is sure to be thoughtful and […]
Well well well! Now that we have a sheriff candidate who wants to kill abortionists, a governor who has decided that women are pregnant two weeks before they conceive, a GOP senate candidate who thinks that women can shut down pregnancy stemming from a “legitimate” rape, and another governor who wants to subject women seeking […]
Yesterday Karl Rove met with a group of billionaires in a secret room in Tampa, where he suggested that murdering Todd Akin might be an appropriate means of delivering his party to higher, more Senate-controlling vistas. It’s about time Karl Rove considered this, the murder of Todd Akin. Wasn’t it sort of obvious…?
This morning a Rasmussen poll came out showing Missouri magical fetal dumphead, Rep. Todd Akin, trailing Sen. Claire McCaskill by 10 percentage points, 48% to 38%. Considering that any GOP Senate candidate who can spell his own name was expected to be leading McCaskill by 10 to 15 points consistently through November, this is considered […]
Oh, for fuck’s sake. A Republican candidate for Hillsborough County Sheriff said Wednesday that he believes elective abortions are unlawful and he wouldn’t reject the use of deadly force to stop them. This is a position we would like to see more fully fleshed out before we reject it out of hand. Possibly a marauding […]
You may have heard over the past few days of Dr. Jack Willke (because you read Wonkette with slavish devotion), the crazy man who spreads the lie that you can’t get pregnant if you’re goodly and righteously raped. You probably also heard that he was buddy-buddy with Mitt Romney in 2008, because Mitt Romney would […]
Now that Missouri’s finest reproductive sorcerer Rep. Todd Akin is “in it,” by which we mean his Senate race, so as “to win it,” we should expect to see many on the right to start saying, oh well, maybe we were too hard on the ol’ galoot after all. It was just one sentence, right? […]
Perfidious cockbucket Todd Akin received enthusiastic support Tuesday from noted insane persons Phyllis Schlafly and Bryan Fischer. Remarkably, this is not expected to hurt his chances for election to the US Senate. Reaching previously unplumbed depths of either cluelessness or chicanery — even for her — Ms. Schlafly carefully explained that Akin was not in […]
Serial fact-raper Todd Akin (R-R’lyeh) has decided, what the hell, since he’s clarifying things, he might as well just clarify a little more. After telling Mike Huckabee that he’s definitely still running for the Senate, and after appearing to momentarily acknowledge biological facts, Akin has now doubled down on the crazy, insisting in an interview […]
Vaginal magic expert Rep. Todd Akin has just gone on the Mike Huckabee radio show to announce his final decision before today’s 5:00 drop-out deadline and LOL, he’s staying in. The reason is the same as yesterday: 9/11, and how the first responders wouldn’t want him to quit!…?? Hoo boy. We could see this coming, […]
Todd Akin has decided to stick with his Senate race in Missouri and ensure that Claire McCaskill gets another six years of Hardball appearances, and his first step to losing is this brilliant ad.
Yesterday, Rep. Todd Akin, who is the GOP nominee for the US Senate in Missouri, made a comment declaring that women who experienced “legitimate rape” could not get pregnant. Today, Man-Who-Used-To-Be-Skinny Mike Huckabee had Akin on his show to handhold him through a damage control interview. About two minutes in, Huckabee asks Akin if he […]