todd akin
Mitt Romney To Nutter Rapey Doctor Last Year: ‘We Agree On Almost Everything’
You may have heard over the past few days of Dr. Jack Willke (because you read Wonkette with slavish devotion), the crazy man who spreads the lie that you can’t get pregnant if you’re goodly and righteously raped. You probably also heard that he was buddy-buddy with Mitt Romney in 2008, because Mitt Romney would [...]
Rep. Joe Walsh Just Doesn’t Get Why Everyone Slammed Todd Akin Like That
Now that Missouri’s finest reproductive sorcerer Rep. Todd Akin is “in it,” by which we mean his Senate race, so as “to win it,” we should expect to see many on the right to start saying, oh well, maybe we were too hard on the ol’ galoot after all. It was just one sentence, right? [...]
Phyllis Schlafly And Bryan Fischer Pretty Much Think Todd Akin Is Jesus
Perfidious cockbucket Todd Akin received enthusiastic support Tuesday from noted insane persons Phyllis Schlafly and Bryan Fischer. Remarkably, this is not expected to hurt his chances for election to the US Senate. Reaching previously unplumbed depths of either cluelessness or chicanery — even for her — Ms. Schlafly carefully explained that Akin was not in [...]
Akin Clarifies Clarification: Women Just Constantly Lie About Rape All The Time
Serial fact-raper Todd Akin (R-R’lyeh) has decided, what the hell, since he’s clarifying things, he might as well just clarify a little more. After telling Mike Huckabee that he’s definitely still running for the Senate, and after appearing to momentarily acknowledge biological facts, Akin has now doubled down on the crazy, insisting in an interview [...]
Todd Akin’s Final Answer: He’s In It To Win It! (Also Too, 9/11)
Vaginal magic expert Rep. Todd Akin has just gone on the Mike Huckabee radio show to announce his final decision before today’s 5:00 drop-out deadline and LOL, he’s staying in. The reason is the same as yesterday: 9/11, and how the first responders wouldn’t want him to quit!…?? Hoo boy. We could see this coming, [...]
Todd Akin Straightforwardly Accepts Responsibility For Deeply Loving Rape Victims
Todd Akin has decided to stick with his Senate race in Missouri and ensure that Claire McCaskill gets another six years of Hardball appearances, and his first step to losing is this brilliant ad.
Todd Akin Explains ‘Legitimate Rape’ To Mike Huckabee With Wheelchairs And 9/11
Yesterday, Rep. Todd Akin, who is the GOP nominee for the US Senate in Missouri, made a comment declaring that women who experienced “legitimate rape” could not get pregnant. Today, Man-Who-Used-To-Be-Skinny Mike Huckabee had Akin on his show to handhold him through a damage control interview. About two minutes in, Huckabee asks Akin if he [...]
Missouri Senate Candidate Todd Akin’s Guide to Legitimate vs. Illegitimate Rape
Missouri Congressman and GOP Senate candidate Todd Akin is a brilliant scientist (with a B.S. in something called “Management Engineering”) and is therefore highly qualified to speak on the intricacies of female anatomy, especially when it comes to the heretofore unknown magic powers of the reproductive system. Did you know, for example, that the uterus [...]
Quick-Scrubbing Congressman Was Worried About Soviet Union Yesterday, Russian Federation Today
Congressman Todd Akin of Missouri is kind of stupid and we can prove it. In a very serious press release titled “Akin Against Ceding Low Earth Orbit Capabilities to Russians,” Akin (meaning his communications person, but let’s pick on the top guy anyway) writes: “The decision by the Obama administration to gut NASA’s manned flight [...]
Terrible Congressman Comically Screws Up His Precious Pledge Of Allegiance
This one is a beauty. Congressman Todd Akin, speaking before the Bachmaniacs at the Super Bowl of Retardation, delivers a glib lecture about the Pledge of Allegiance, its history, and its awesome inclusion of “Under God.” He asks the crowd to join him in the Pledge, because it “drives the liberals crazy.” And then he [...]
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