June 19, 2013
When the honest to God actual journalists at TMZ (seriously; have they ever been wrong about anything?) ran into Hero of American Journamalism Bob Woodward, they had some important questions at the ready, like “why are you the worst writer in the universe,” and “how come you constantly lie?” and “how’s your court-mandated remedial journalism [...]
Woe be this day, for the fairy tale romantic love of Sarah Palin’s eldest princeling son and his once-preggers bride have filed to dissolve their holiest shotgun union.
video platformvideo managementvideo solutionsvideo player Hey, everybody cannot be good at everything. Che Guevara, for instance, was very good at being sexy and riding his motorcycle and killing people, but very bad at being Minister of Factories or whatever for Cuba. His Lord High Hairgel Mittens of Romney, in the meantime, is very good at [...]
Nope, not kidding. The shouty New Jersey Governor is now yelling at any constituents strolling the scenic Jersey Shore who might happen to take issue with his stance on screaming at teachers (i.e., that he is for it). TMZ has the exciting footage of what looks to be the corpulent mister preparing to chest bump [...]
Oh, Donald Trump, WHY did you get out of the presidential race? Whyyyyyyy? First your Miss Universe pageant, that you own, was all nuh uh beautiful transgendered Miss Canada contestant, you did not feeeeel like a natural woman (woman). And then they were all, eh, why not, chick is super, SUPER hot! And then Gloria [...]
TMZ has learned that America’s greatest tabloid teenage prodigy, Bristol Palin, bought that giant foreclosed heap of architectural sin in exurban Arizona because she wants to attend America’s finest institution of higher learnin’, Arizona State, also known as “The Cambridge of the Great Air-Conditioned Desert.” Sure, your editor, who went to a private university with [...]
Internet municipal-election registration-document compendium TMZ has obtained Levi Johnston’s Alaska Public Offices Commission letter of intent to run for office in Wasilla. Apparently Levi is running for “City of Wasilla 2011.” Is it possible to be elected a city rather than just elected to an office of that city? IT’S UP TO THE VOTERS.
IT’S 9/11 + HALLOWEEN × INFINITY: Human oddity Michael Jackson is dead, according to a chain of increasingly reliable media outlets starting with TMZ and ending with Raw Story the New York Times. (Just kidding, it’s only TMZ and some blogs. The LA Times says he’s in a coma … and NOW he’s officially deceased.) [...]
HMM. And what is with the clown socks? [TMZ]
Oh look it’s Carey Torrice, County Commissioner in Macomb County, Michigan! Some e-mail we just got, completely unrelated, tells us that Macomb County is a bellwether for the state. Important! And Carey Torrice, who recently won TMZ’s search for America’s hottest politician, pretty much runs it. And yet, despite having a hot piece of ass [...]
Here, according to showbiz site TMZ.com, is “the most hated man in reality TV,” who somehow got “into Obama’s face” yesterday, at a BBQ joint in Virginia somewhere. This, according to TMZ, is proof that the Secret Service is trying to kill Barack Obama. [TMZ]
Here’s your beloved 2004 presidential loser John Kerry, enjoying a “B.J.” on the docks of Nantucket, where he encountered a “party boat” full of these gals, especially this one with the “penis straw” (for practice) and then this one with the “crotch shot.” All of this is on TMZ.com, of course, because John Kerry is [...]
DOES HIS WIFE KNOW WHERE HE IS?: Yesterday the videographers at TMZ ran into disgraced former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer, just a-walkin’ the streets of New York City! He was evidently searching for new prostitutes while carrying a tabbed folder, which was also filled with prostitutes. In this 20-second video, Spitzer says that he [...]
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