tim pawlenty
Maybe it was an accident — maybe there’s a hip-hop golfing star or a Food Network host (World’s Biggest Hamburgers!) or somebody in those Twilight Mormon dry-hump books with a similar name — but for some reason, Tim Pawlenty has managed to sell 4,765 copies of his “new book,” which is probably just a print-on-demand [...]
We have no idea why Tim Pawlenty ever was considered a serious candidate for president; these things just happen, we guess. Has Pawlenty ever shouted “YOU LIE” at the current man in the office? No, and that fact should disqualify him. But yesterday, a veritable meeting of the minds occurred: Pawlenty went on insane AFA [...]
Gov. Tim Pawlenty of Minnesota has been gearing up for a bid for the Republican presidential nomination for months. He chose not to run for re-election as governor. He has hit the early-state circuit. Everything is ready once he leaves office on Jan. 3. Except for this: He may not be able to leave. Under [...]
Fenty credited Gray with running a “strategic” and “disciplined” campaign and said he will not run against him. In fact, Fenty said he doubts he will ever be in elected office again. “For me, this is the beginning of the end of a great 10-year run,” he said. Aww. Somebody needs a Tom Tancredo hug. [...]
You might recall that Tim Pawlenty distinguished himself this week by turning down federal sex-ed money and then money for health care for children. You probably think that this is just because Tim Pawlenty loves the thought of Minnesota’s young people catching sex diseases and then not being able to cure them, because they don’t [...]
Minnesota governor Tim Pawlenty has decided to pass up $850,000 in federal sex education funds, because he would rather waste his state’s own money to teach children about “abstinence.” Have fun, kids: Reproductive rights groups chastised Gov. Tim Pawlenty Monday for refusing federal money for comprehensive sex education in exchange for abstinence-education funds that will [...]
Republican Congressional candidate Joel Demos is a father, a fixer-upper owner, a working man — you know, just a Regular Guy from MicheleBachmannsota who does Regular Guy Things, like…pull huge-ass monster trucks toward pretend finish lines to meet potential supporters and make friends. Errr, maybe he should try using a gas product to move that [...]
Tim Pawlenty’s wife Mary just discovered yet another reason out of a presumably infinite list why it would suck to be married to someone running two years early for a 2012 presidential nomination: because your husband will begin all of his stump speeches by extolling you as an object of sexual desire. Then you will [...]
Oooh, it’s her SECOND ad! This is a major event! Yes, Margaret Anderson Kelliher is the Democratic (“DFL” in Minnesota’s Canadian speak) endorsed candidate for governor of Minnesota, and as you can see from this ad, she is running against Tim Pawlenty, future president of us all. Except Tim Pawlenty is not running for governor, [...]
Tim Pawlenty, the Minnesota governor who wants to be president but is incapable of making anyone care about him, ever, was so jealous of Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann’s CURRENT & ACTUALLY HAPPENING RIGHT NOW death rally that he stone cold invited himself and fuckin’ bought the website BachmannRally.com, putting his own stupid logo over [...]
Until this interstate race-to-the-bottom makes its next road trip, Minnesota will now be our Realest American state. Here’s how Timmy Pawlenty wants to eliminate his huge budget deficit (which, to be fair, is a monumentally shitty task for any governor): “Aid to cities, counties and health and human services took the deepest cuts in Pawlenty’s [...]
Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty, the 2012 candidate everyone’s heard about and immediately forgotten, holds a very special position for the Republican party: he runs around the country giving speeches that no one cares about BUT ONLY TO DISGUISE his true purpose, which is cash. He distributes unmarked bills and checks to people. Powerful people. Real [...]
Woo-hoo, the Seattle police just cold gunned down a black guy! But not just a regular standing-around black guy, an actual alleged cop killer who is likely the guy — eh, he can’t sue now, right? — okay, the actual cop-killing sonofabitch, totally dead, “shot and killed in South Seattle early this morning by a [...]
Okay you guys, Michael Steele has been doing some Googling. No one panic. It’s just that, well, you’ve probably already heard about her, but… this Olympia Snowe lady? “I say, Welcome. Welcome. Each member of this party has a unique footprint. And it’s different from region to region. I can’t win in the Northeast with [...]
