Wonkette

Last week, we gave you the inside scoop on Dick Cheney’s “tight hole operations.” And yesterday, we shared with you the ten questions about “tight hole operations” that we submitted to Jeff Gannon. We know that the suspense over what he wrote in response is killing you — so here it is:

Your questions are funnier than any answer I could give. I do appreciate the opportunity, however. Please keep in touch, Jeff Gannon.

Yes, we’re as disappointed as you are by Gannon’s gracious, good-humored, but non-humorous response. What are we going to do now?

We’ll do what we do best here at Wonkette: make stuff up!

After the jump, our manufactured responses to the “tight hole operations” questions we posed to Jeff Gannon.

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Shortly after we issued our initial report on Vice President Dick Cheney’s “tight hole operations,” an irate Wonkette reader emailed us: “You did a story on ‘tight hole operations,’ and you didn’t ask Jeff Gannon for comment! What’s up with that? You guys are no Ana Marie Cox.”

Eager to remedy this journalistic lapse, we emailed Mr. Gannon with ten questions about “tight hole operations” — which you can read for yourself, after the jump.

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* In case you’re just returning from a long vacation at a secluded Caribbean hideaway, where you had no access to television, radio, newspapers, or the internet, here’s what you missed: Vice President Dick Cheney shot a man last weekend, then took his sweet time in telling the American people about it. (Wonkette’s full coverage is available here.) MORE »

This morning, after posting a picture of a rather dubious sign outside the Armstrong ranch, we posed the following question to you, our loyal readers: MORE »

Take a look at this screen cap showing a sign outside the Armstrong ranch, where the Dick Cheney hunting accident took place: MORE »