The biggest television event of the day has already occurred, and it has nothing to do with Obama and death care. Meghan McCain has been guest-hosting the ladies’ television program The View, and today’s celebrity drop-ins included Mr. Rod Blagojevich and his lovely wife Miss Lady. Meghan tells Blago that he is “ballsy” for writing a book. “You definitely must feel like you didn’t do anything wrong I mean to write a book and whatever like that’s how secure you are that this is something else?” “Well that’s exactly right, Meghan.” [YouTube]

On Wednesday and Thursday the Internet’s First Daughter, Meghan McCain, will be appearing on The View, America’s most threatening daytime pastiche! She will be filling in for one of the ladies, the Elizabeth one, who plays an uninformed blond conservative named “Elizabeth.” It will be the greatest performance of young Meg’s blossoming guest-hosting/role modeling/media criticism/blog/Tina Brown/Twitter/The Hills/boys!!/punditry career. She will obviously be interviewing Rod Blagojevich. MORE »

IMPORTANT 9/11- AND WHOOPI GOLDBERG-RELATED INFORMATION: Next up on Rudy Giuliani’s eight-year September 11th press junket: an appearance on The View, on 9/11! Never forget… to set your DVRs. [Ben Smith]

New York. The Big Apple.

Beautiful young Meg McCabe finally had the city at her feet. As the guest host of “The Look,” she’d finally have the chance to deliver some straight talk — to the women of America, and also to the uptown media elites who’d long ago written her off. Uncensored, off the cuff — who knew what could happen on this explosive discussion show anchored by the legendary reporting doyenne Daphne Waters, an aging beauty who had long ago engaged in a passionate affair with Meg’s own father?

Stay tuned, ladies and germs! Your Wonkette will liveblog this crap until it gets boring … say, 15 minutes in? [The View]

• Shameless anti-Roland Burris propaganda organs The Washington Post and The Chicago Tribune are demanding that America’s first black president Roland Burris retire from the Senate and give up his position of chairman of the Joint Committee on Inspiring Generations to Come. [TPMMuckraker]
• This guy, Mike Quigley, is the favorite to be crowned Replacement Rahm Emanuel, as dictated by Chicago’s newspapers. [Daily Kos]
• In an apparent attempt to, hmm, make this whole sinning-confession-forgiveness process more Taylorist (?), Arkansas has just passed a law allowing its citizens to bring guns into church. [Andrew Sullivan]
• O song of the Drudge Siren! BREAKING: Michelle Malkin-national socialism-manila envelope-digital-camera-scandal! [Crooks and Liars]
• John McCain refuses to go back to the View, the site of 5 1/2 years of dehumanizing psychological and physical torture. [CNN Political Ticker]

Geraldo Rivera’s at Fox News now (he’s been there for years, we think, but it never really registered until now), trackin’ down the hot stories. We think he was somewhat taken aback, though, in this clip where he “chases down” Blago in the parking lot of the view. MORE »

Here’s Rod Blagojevich on The View, whining about not being able to defend himself in his Senate impeachment trial, which is happening simultaneously, JESUS CHRIST. He was literally on every teevee show this morning running his fat mouth. Apologizing for his curse words, which he learned from the vulgar poors in his “tough neighborhood” growing up. Then he grabs Whoopi Goldberg while explaining how the constitutional instrument of impeachment is unconstitutional, and that weird white lady, Joan or something, pretends she is Richard Nixon and the crowd goes insane, because she’s pretending to be Richard Nixon, right, end of segment. [YouTube]

Attorney Edward Genson has abruptly quit his role leading the Gov. Blago defense team two days before the idiot’s impeachment trial begins in the Illinois Senate. Instead of listing the standard “personal reasons” or a professional conflict of interest, Genson cites that JESUS CHRIST HOW DO YOU WORK WITH THIS IDIOT: “I never require a client to do what I say, but I do require them to at least listen.” MORE »

• Palin had a tanning bed installed in the Alaska’s governor’s mansion. She could see Russia from that tanning bed. [Ezra Klein]
• Look into Barack Obama’s very soul with a theocrat/secularist ass thermometer that also appears to be a hypnosis device. [BeliefNet]
• Palin is trying to get some hockey moms to wear a button that features this nautical star thing popular with emo heroin addicts. [Jonathan Martin]
• Despite “not wanting to judge” gay people, Palin’s church has a history of trying to “cure” gay people, with Jesus! [Andrew Sullivan]
• In a new teevee commercial, Obama exposes McCain’s corrupt secret handshakes with lobbying fatcats like President Bush. [Crooks and Liars]
• Bored out of her mind, Cindy McCain begins public ladyfeud with the mental cases on The View, even the weepy conservative one! [Fresh Intelligence]

What is the world coming to when the ladies on The View ask John McCain the toughest questions he’s gotten in weeks? And yet even these hardened journalists don’t follow up on one of his most infuriating talking points of this whole infuriating campaign, which is that he had to start running ads that were complete utter laughable bullshit lies because Obama didn’t want to debate him as often as McCain would have liked. This is akin to saying, “I was forced to smother your house in a truckload of diarrhea because you wouldn’t answer my phone calls.” Anyhow, here he is, squirming despicably. [Huffington Post]

This is the most crucial segment of Michelle Obama’s amazing visit to The View, in which the ladies discuss Mrs. Obama’s fierce guns, Whoopi Goldberg congratulates her for having teeth without gold around them, and Barbara Walters bitches about pantyhose. Then Michelle tells a cute story about her ten-year-old daughter, who can’t pass any laws. [RedLasso]