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Tag: the south

This is America now basically

These Southern Governors Ain’t Got Time For Your Dumbass Gay-Hatin’ Rigamarole

<a href="http://wonkette.com/600470/gov-nikki-haley-not-entirely-sure-why-yall-gotta-be-such-bigots"></a>In all the gross bad terrible news about anti-gay bills coming out of the South, there have been a few shining lights, specifically, three Southern governors who have decided NOT to be complete dicks. Two are Republicans and...

No, The KKK Is Not And Has Never Been Liberal: A Historysplainer

Of course the Ku Klux Klan was never on the side of liberals and progress. This goes without saying. There can't possibly be anyone who disputes this basic notion, could there? Of course there could. Of fucking course there could....
We dunno.

God Turns His Back On Gay-Hatin’ Tennessee Lawmakers

It's a bad week for gay-bashing political types in the Tennessee legislature. They just KNEW they had an ace in the hole, a sexciting new way to ban the Supreme Court from forcing gaysexual homo-nasty into their Christian throats,...
Bye, fucker!

New Orleans Kills Confederate Traitors All Over Again

Ever since the horrific murders in Charleston, South Carolina, of nine black churchgoers by a young radicalized white supremacist named Dylann Roof, civilized places throughout the great American South have been looking at their Confederate relics and deciding them's ugly and dumb....
Fuck that dumb flag.

Confederate Flag-Humpers Indicted Just For Threatening To Kill Black Children

We can only imagine, as a verified Southern, what it must feel like to be a really shitty, confederate flag-loving moron who can't even manage to finish rubbing his privates against the trailer park's communal sex goat before he hears...
That's yr gay Wonkette's niece. She's actually a wingnut, but her parents pose her for pictures like this.

A Sappy Love Letter From Your Gay Wonkette, About America Getting Gay Marriaged In The Butt

Thursday night, I sat in my parents' front yard just outside Memphis and looked at the house where I spent my teenage years. I wasn't intending to have either Poignant Thoughts or A Moment, I just wanted to smoke a...

How Is President Obama Being Un-White Today?

We are sorry to be the ones to have to tell you this, but not only is Barack Hussein Obama "exotic," but also he is 47 percent negro (because MATH) and some sad crackers in the South and Arizona,...

Atlanta Teachers Save Newspaper Industry With Valiant Cheating Effort

The daily life of American children in 2011 is, at best, a tragedy. They are obese from inhaling Pop’em donuts in front of the teevee, knocked up from having slumber parties in the wilderness, and they are also only...

Mississippi Wins Coveted Free Gay Porn/God Google Search Prize

Mississippi is a book by William Faulkner that somehow turned into a dumb reality show called Haley Barbour and Other Comical Racist White Villains With Dumb Accents vs. Poor Black People Forever. And ever since the nation's poorest, most...

Already Way Down In 37th Place, American Life Expectancy Is Much Worse In the South, Texas, Etc.

How's the "best health care system in the world" doing, these days? Uhh .... Large swaths of the United States are showing decreasing or stagnating life expectancy even as the nation’s overall longevity trend has continued upwards, according to a...

Tennessee Legislature Making It Illegal To Mention To Kids Gay People Exist

On Monday, Tennessee's state House passed a bill to ban local laws that protect gay citizens from discrimination after the cesspool that is Nashville decided it would start considering gay people human beings of all things. (GAYS ARE A...

Tennessee GOP Bravely Votes To Teach ‘Creationism’ In Public Schools

We're not sure how this is news in Tennessee, where schoolteacher John Scopes lost the "Scopes Monkey Trial" (in both the state courts and the U.S. Supreme Court) back in 1925-26, but "Tennessee's Republican-dominated House of Representatives has overwhelmingly...

Secessionist Arkansas State Rep: Confed. Flag ‘Symbol of Jesus Christ’

Hey, you know what's happening in the year 2010? A guy recently elected to the state legislature in Arkansas is the local chairman of a secessionist organization and says the flag of the Confederacy is "a symbol of Jesus...

Coal Companies Kill Mountains, For Fun

Every day, President Obama wakes up beside Rahm Emanuel (they are both naked) and wonders how he can force you stupid fucks to retroactively abort your children. This is his primary goal, as Commander-in-Chief. And then he gets...

Wingnut Website Offers ‘Politically Incorrect’ Book About Civil War

Are you bummed about not being able to own African slaves, both because of your permanently doomed financial condition and also the anti-state's-rights 13th amendment to the Constitution? Well we hope you are enjoying being an angry old white...

Illiterate Southern ‘Vampire’ Offers Racial Advice

Last week your Wonkette posted some news about racism in Tennessee, because it was so shocking and rare and etc. Racism, in the South?! Many days later, this post drained all the way to the Internet's southern parts, where...