Before you appear on a reality tee-vee program, make sure to read the STD clause in your release very carefully. Very very carefully. Because MTV will not fix your genitals if you dry-hump a love sack and then contract the crotch rot. Contractually, MTV is simply not responsible. It’s in your contract, understand? Good. Now sign here please. [Washington Examiner] MORE »

OMG PEOPLE ARE TWATTING ABOUT REAL WORLD DC TWATS! First, MTV built “love sacks,” and we did nothing. Now, the actual cast of this program, well they are walking around DC! People are doing the Twitter about this! We may have to send Intern Riley over there to hand out some poop-tarts. [Washington City Paper]

The young intern was hungry for some popcorn, so she put her intern badge in the microwave. Later she spilled some cranberry juice on her favorite pleated skirt, so she used her intern badge to rub the stain out. And after another long day of indexing toenail clippings, the exhausted young intern walked to Metro Center and swiped her intern badge over the SmarTrip reader. Why me? She thought to herself as she took the metro home. Why did God choose me? And for a moment she felt undeserving. [Spotted: DC Interns] MORE »

Whoa, the news scoops keep coming from City Paper about the horrific plans for the Real World gloom factory on 20th St. NW: The contractors have been instructed to install frightening “Love Sacks” — five of them, in a testicle-shaped “bay window,” so that neighbors and passers-by will have to watch the eight (?) cast members in constant acts of sodomy whilst perched upon said Love Sacks. MORE »

What kind of DC buildings generally require a large room called a “confessional,” hmmm? Maybe churches? But nobody builds churches anymore. Maybe Michael Steele’s dream plans for the new GOP headquarters, where the Republicans can boozily admit to their various crimes of racism and pedophilia? NO EVEN BETTER, this is a scoop from the Washington City Paper: Actual blueprints for the Real World DC “weeping chamber,” where the young and talentless stars of this year’s edition of some old MTV comedy will be forced to admit to terrible, terrible things. MORE »

All the food buzz these days seems to about where the Obamas are eating, or the restaurants to avoid because they’re infested with interns, or where those kids from the Real World are going to eat their first meal in the big city. MORE »

Let’s see, what do we talk about around here all the time now? Teen pregnancy, and MTV’s The Real World in Washington. Here’s a new show coming up on that very same network, but it’s about the real Real World, for Americans, which is “you get knocked up in high school” and … well, that’s about it. Unless you’re Sarah Palin’s babydaughter, generally you are never heard from again, because you will be a cashier at Food 4 Less or whatever, part time. Anyway, ignore the Target commercial at the beginning here and enjoy this tragic promo for MTV’s 16 and Pregnant, directed by our old pal Morgan J. Freeman.

Since the early 1960s, there has been an annual rumor about the teevee program The Real World doing a season in Washington, which is a city known as the capital of America. And this year, FINALLY, the important MTV grunge “camgirl” show is really for real being videotaped right here in DC. But not everyone is thrilled beyond belief — one person, in fact, has bravely launched a free blog account about how maybe it would’ve been vv good had the entertainment cable show The Real World done a season in Washington maybe during some earlier year but definitely not this year because what is even up with that? [Anti-Real World DC]

We have a bad feeling about this: TeeVee atrocity The Real World, which basically invented “reality television” about 15 years ago, in San Francisco, when this fucking bike messenger with tattoos on his legs would show up to what had been fun bars, and then people would say, “Oh that is the bike messenger from teevee’s The Real World,” is probably coming to Washington with its would-be famous young people with no talent. You will see these people in the bars and cheaper restaurants, and you will know them by the MTV production van and fat camera guys following the kids everywhere, and sticking those very bright hideous annoying lights in your face, when you are trying to have a fucking drink somewhere. MORE »