Liberals, don’t you just hate them! The worst kind of liberal is one who earns a big salary. Hypocrites! It is completely impossible to both make a decent living and have Liberal Views about the government’s role in society. Sure, go do cocaine in your limousine, then try saying you support health care for disadvantaged kids. MOONBATS! Anyway, once again The Politico has SEIZED THE MORNING and BUGGERED THE NEWS CYCLE and brutally punished the POWER EQUATION with the shocking revelation that college-professor Barack Obama was supported by other college professors, including some well-known scholars and scientists who, hypocritically, make low-six-figure salaries working for America’s better universities. [Gawker]

Politico ed John Harris cops to being the guy responsible for “slow bleed,” the term that’s killed John Murtha’s Iraq-ending plan dead. He’s so guilty about it he wrote a couple hundred words noting how quickly it spread and how now everyone’s using it look at all the Nexis hits and oh woe is he he surely wouldn’t do that again! MORE »

We haven’t written a word on the John Edwards hired-bloggers scandal because it’s stupid and boring, but that didn’t stop Dan Gerstein. In today’s Politico, he lays out his case: Liberal bloggers are stupid anti-Christian meanies who need to be DESTROYED. And they’re bad for the Democratic party and Kos is a vampire, blah blah blah. MORE »

This screengrab comes from the current front page of The Politico’s website. The Politico, as you know, is revolutionizing journalism and media. They are doing this by presenting two photo galleries made up mostly of Politico staffers. On the far left, three Politico staffers yuk it up at The Politico’s Politico Party. On the far right, Politico editor Jim VandeHei inexplicably ends up in a photo of James Clyburn, and another Politico writer. The middle picture is either Will Smith or Mike Allen, we can’t be sure. MORE »

What happens when you don’t feel like answering questions from Mike Allen, Bestest Political Reporter in the World? He’ll write 1,200 words on how much of a dick you are. MORE »

Last night, we learned that Rep. Loretta Sanchez quit the Congressional House Caucus because its chair called her a whore. This evening, an operative forwarded us this email from The Politico’s talented Josie Hearn to a number of her collegues.

Subject: Loretta Sanchez story
From: “Josephine Hearn”
Date: Thu, 1 Feb 2007 16:24:40 -0500
To: [Redacted]

Hi all,

If you are working on a story about Loretta Sanchez and the CHC, please credit Politico.com for breaking the story.

Below I am including stories I have written over the past year on the CHC rift. They may be of use to you.

Thanks,
Josephine Hearn

Unfortunately, one of the recipients had already kinda broken the story too. Full, cranky email exchange, after the jump.

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We have the oldest Senate ever, reports the Politico. The chamber of old white men is older than ever before, because modern medical science won’t allow rich people to die until they’re good and ready these days. MORE »

The city’s newest waste of sidewalk space, Capitol Hill rag The Politico, launched today with some heavy self-congratulation from all the Post and Time dudes they lured over there with promises of riches. What’s the verdict? It’s, uh… a website! And some blogs! It’s kind of like the Post’s politics section, except NEWER and with laxer editing in the in-house blogs: MORE »

Remember the 31st and Q mansion we mentioned last week? The most expensive home ever bought in Washington? The one where an aspiring British politician had his throat slit in the driveway last July? Reliable Source revealed the buyers yesterday: Robert and Elena Allbritton!

Come learn who they are with us, after the jump.

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* Heard on the Hill: Rep. Linda Sánchez judged a “best package” contest at Cobalt last week… Sex-starved middle-aged Washington women swooned over Richard Gere at the Old Ebbitt Grill… HoH columnist Mary Ann Akers is moving to Washingtonpost.com. [Roll Call]
* Reliable Source: Reliable Source readers vote Cynthia McKinney’s Cap Police beatdown the best Washington Gossip of ‘06. [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Congressional offices all pretending they’re not betting like fiends on today’s Florida/OSU game, though Deborah Pryce and Adam Putnam have some sort of “betting for little kids” candy-vs.-pie thing going on… 300 old people protested AEI… Nancy Pelosi washes own hair at Salon! [Examiner]
* Washington Whispers: Former Post-ites turned Politico anchors John Harris and Jim VandHei smoke lots and lots of weed while discussing future of journalism… Arnold Schwarzenegger is eying Barbara Boxer’s seat, if you know what we mean. [USN&WR]

* DC sounds like a nice place, except for all the tools. [Metroblogging DC]
* What the hell kind of Capitol Hill newspaper needs a video trailer? We hate the Internet. [DCeiver]
* Vote for DC media person of the year! We’re pretty sure it’s Plan B. [FishbowlDC]
* Federal employees get a four day weekend just ’cause some President died. Lazy fuckers. [Reuters via DCist]