Tag Archives: the pill

  Fertility Writes

Hero Science Man Matt Walsh: Feminists Hate Women, Because Slut Pills Kill

Lyra, you doofus. Bon Bon's a girl... you don't even need those, silly pony...
Matt Walsh, a dingus who writes for Glenn Beck’s Flaming Internet Hole, presents a science-based case against The Pill, which he has discovered is really, really bad for women, because SCIENCE. For one thing, he read a genuine medical study that found “women who took chemical birth control at any point in their lives show a 50 percent higher likelihood of developing a certain type of brain tumor.” That’s scary! Also it means that The Pill lets men have consequence-free sex, while women will all die of diseased brains! Read more on Hero Science Man Matt Walsh: Feminists Hate Women, Because Slut Pills Kill…
  fuckabee

Megyn Kelly To Mike Huckabee: We’re Just Whoring It Up All Over The Place At Fox News!

Sometimes Megyn Kelly does a thing where we don’t hate her, and then we write “Megyn Kelly did a thing and we didn’t hate her” and the commenters go URGGGH UGHHHH WHY CAN’T YOU BE MORE VENGEANCIER WE HATE YOU FOR NOT HATING HER REEDUCATION CAMPS FOR MEGYN KELLY AND ALSO FOR YOUUUUU! So boring you guys. Why not appreciate when terrible people are unterrible for a second? Why not give them gentle back-pats, and then they might like their gentle back-pats, and try to get more of them, by not being Megyn Kelly once in a while? Read more on Megyn Kelly To Mike Huckabee: We’re Just Whoring It Up All Over The Place At Fox News!…
  In Derpiest Battle

Sundays With The Christianists: John Steinbeck Invented ‘Bortion, Wrote Evil Books

A movie about a temptress, we guess
Now here’s a surprise: a rightwing Christian rant against John Steinbeck that barely mentions The Grapes of Wrath at all. If nothing else, we can credit wingnut radio preacher and homeschooling “expert” Kevin Swanson with this much: He’s not always predictable. Or at least, while his opinions are completely predictable, the particular topics he chooses to obsess about aren’t necessarily what you’d expect. We’ve reached the end of the literature survey portion of Swanson’s ebook manifesto, Apostate: The Men Who Destroyed the Christian West, although he still has a couple of chapters on modern popular culture for us to slog through in his screed about the decline of Western civilization from a nonexistent Christian norm. Read more on Sundays With The Christianists: John Steinbeck Invented ‘Bortion, Wrote Evil Books…
  Book Of Hatchet Job

Sundays with the Christianists: How Mark Twain Steered America Toward Hell

Mark Twain and his familiar
You may have thought that Mark Twain was some kind of literary genius, but did you also know that he personally ruined America by being such a good writer of books, which ruined America? We’ve finally reached the chapter we’ve been waiting for in Kevin Swanson’s culture-war epic Apostate: The Men Who Destroyed the Christian West, in which the Colorado radio preacher and homeschooling advocate explains how pretty much everything we think of as Western Civilization is actually an assault on true civilization, by which he means the Bible and people who read it like Kevin Swanson does. We bought this horrible little e-book last year after Swanson talked about Twain with fellow wingnut Rick Wiles and claimed that Twain was clearly influenced by demons. We figured it would be a pretty good fight: America’s greatest writer versus a rightwing radio preacher who thinks birth control pills fill women’s innards with hundreds of fossilized dead babies. Our money was definitely on the literary genius, who still held the advantage despite being dead for over a century. Read more on Sundays with the Christianists: How Mark Twain Steered America Toward Hell…
  The House Of Seven Goebbels

Sundays With The Christianists: Why ‘The Scarlet Letter’ Is Bad For Jesus And America

Of course there's a manga version
It’s Pearl Harbor Day, so what more fitting time to talk about an attack on America? Only this isn’t an attack from some evil foreign empire (redundant, since all foreigns are evil) but from within. As we’re learning from wingnut radio preacher and homeschooling advocate Kevin Swanson, we’re under attack by our very own cultural touchstones — at least those that aren’t the Holy Bible. Read more on Sundays With The Christianists: Why ‘The Scarlet Letter’ Is Bad For Jesus And America…
  The Socialist Network

Sundays With The Christianists: Marx Was Wrong Because Jesus Loved Inequality

We simply couldn't find a Marxist anime demon girl
Happy Dia De Los Muertos, all you Wonkees! Grab a candy skull and let’s commune with the spirits of the departed, which of course probably sounds like consorting with demons to our favorite deranged Christianist, Colorado radio preacher Kevin Swanson. Read more on Sundays With The Christianists: Marx Was Wrong Because Jesus Loved Inequality…
  The Marx of the Beast

Sundays With The Christianists: Homos And Demons And Marx, Oh My!

Why is there a union jack on the skull? Your guess is as good as any. Let's say it represent Marx's London years.
Here we are at Part 3 of our dive into Apostate: The Men Who Destroyed the Christian West, by Kevin Swanson, the radio preacher who likes to warn that the Pill leaves women’s wombs chock full of tiny dead babies, like some kind of horrifying death-muffin, and that his home state of Colorado has become one big gay pot orgy all the time, just like North Korea. Read more on Sundays With The Christianists: Homos And Demons And Marx, Oh My!…
  Still More Lies From The Pit Of Hell

Sundays With The Christianists: How Western Culture Got All Satanic

Image dimensions: 700 X 666 -- we swear it just worked out that way
Welcome to part 2 of our exploration of Apostate: The Men Who Destroyed the Christian West, by Colorado radio preacher Kevin Swanson, whose goal in this book is to explain just how Western Civilization was destroyed by just about everything that we commonly think of as Western Civilization — and which was, moreover, mostly inspired by Satan. As we said last week, in Swanson’s view, the pinnacle of Western culture begins and more or less ends with the Bible, and literary works that are 100% in keeping with Biblical precepts — for instance, he thinks that Augustine’s Confessions and Bunyan’s The Pilgrim’s Progress are a pretty good basis for all the literature classes you’d ever need. Read more on Sundays With The Christianists: How Western Culture Got All Satanic…
  Still More Lies From The Pit Of Hell

Sundays With The Christianists: How Satan Did Western Civilization

Your history tutor
Welp, it took us over a year, but we’ve finally gotten around to reading a book that we warned you about in August 2013: Colorado radio preacher Kevin Swanson, one of our favorite minor-league Christianist nutters, went and wrote a book last year called Apostate: The Men Who Destroyed the Christian West. As the title suggests, it’s all about the death of Western Civilization, which is on its last legs due to what most of us would call the greatest works of our own culture. Read more on Sundays With The Christianists: How Satan Did Western Civilization…
  what's that spell? whore!

A Very Angry Guest Post About Annette Funicello

A guest post from your comrade “Lou Cabron.” And speaking of sluts, three weeks ago pastor Steven Anderson strolled into his Arizona church with proof that “the birth control movement” was promoting whoredom. So the pastor waves around his flimsy print-out, sternly warning the congregation that Annette Funicello is a whore whoring it up with birth control, contributing to whoredom, which “is what birth control does to our society.” Unfortunately, it turned out to be an ad for suntan lotion. Read more on A Very Angry Guest Post About Annette Funicello…
  dear shit-fer-brains

Independent Women’s Forum Furious At Your Wonket!

Oh Lucy what have we done now! Oh, we have just MISUSED and MISCONTEXTED words from the Independent Women’s Forum’s senior contraception correspondent, by not quoting them from the original source (Andrea Peyser) when she did not include them in her column! Not only did we not include Lisa Schiffren’s invisible words that did not appear in Andrea Peyser’s story, but we did not point out that they are even stupider than the ones Peyser did include! We of course regret the error! Let’s go to the email of Victoria R. Coley, IWF communications director! Rebecca, You recently pulled quotes from a New York Post story on the distribution of Plan B without parental consent for your Wonkette post ‘Andrea Peyser Wants to Knock Up Your Pre-Teen.’ The quotes you used from IWF Senior Fellow Lisa Schiffren are taken out of context in your Wonkette post; Schiffren’s quotes (full text below) are in response to young girls receiving the morning-after pill – Plan B – in school without parental consent NOT to young women going to their student health centers to get on birth control. Guys, we had best suss this out! Read more on Independent Women’s Forum Furious At Your Wonket!…
  it's aliiiiive

On The Pill? Tiny Dead Fetuses Are Eating Your Innards

Womyn, wanna hear something really scary? How about: if you are on the Pill, your womb is studded with tiny fetuses, just sitting there, frozen, undead, or maybe they are eating you? We are not sure, because Christian dick radio host Kevin Swanson — last heard explaining that college will turn your daughters into ugly, angrier angry feminist whores — does not really explain the “science” behind your undead womb angels. Suffice it to say, you are murdering babies with your brazen The Pill use, and Kevin Swanson simply does not care for it! A’tall! Read more on On The Pill? Tiny Dead Fetuses Are Eating Your Innards…
  like pearl harbor 9/11 and yoshinoya

Actual United States Congressmen: Free Birth Control Sinks Their Battleships

Remember in 1990, when conservatives shrieked and moaned about the threat to religious freedom that was the Supreme Court upholding a ban on Native Americans’ sacramental Tripping Off of the Balls? You don’t? That is because those people were Indians. But today? Today, Aug. 1, 2012, is a Day That Shall Live in Infamy. This is the day that American women, with their slutty whorish terrorism, and Pill-taking even when their employers don’t want them to, became a living atrocity greater than Pearl Harbor or 9/11. Actual sitting United States congressmen said so. They said it with their mouths. In front of people. Are you happy now, womyn? ARE YOU? “I know in your mind you can think of the times America was attacked,” said Rep. Mike Kelly (R-Pa.), a freshman. “One is December 7 — that is Pearl Harbor Day. Another was September 11 — that was the day of the terrorist attack. I want you to remember August 1, 2012 — the attack on our religious freedom. That is a date that will live in infamy, along with those other dates.” Read more on Actual United States Congressmen: Free Birth Control Sinks Their Battleships…
  i love my live straight son!

Operation Rescue Founder Randall Terry Invites Your Wonkette To Drink Beer, Murder Children

Oh that is nice, Randall Terry, the pro-life activist and “Democrat” who beat Obama in 242 percent of the Oklahoma Democratic primaries this year, has a new website, and he is inviting the “child-killers” at Your Wonkette (along with the cool dudes at RightWingWatch and the humorless nags at Jezzy) to come join him for a virtual beer! This is awkward because Your Wonkette once made a very clever Heathers joke about Randall Terry loving his dead gay son, but then it turned out Randall Terry’s gay son was actually dead, and Your Wonkette had a brief and unwelcome (not to mention “unfamiliar”) bout with utter shame. Then we got over it, because there were children around that hadn’t yet been murdered. A woman’s work is just never done! Read more on Operation Rescue Founder Randall Terry Invites Your Wonkette To Drink Beer, Murder Children…
  palinspeak

Sarah Palin Has Put In The Final Word On Evil Contraceptives

No one knows how to turn a good preposition like Sarah Palin: “Truly, it is a war on our religious liberties and that violation of conscience that he would mandate that is un-American because it violates our First Amendment in our Constitution.” Exactly. Read more on Sarah Palin Has Put In The Final Word On Evil Contraceptives…