Wonkette

There are “life lessons” for all new beauty queens. Miss USA and Miss Teen USA learned it’s best not to be caught having coked-up lesbian sex together, and new Miss America Lauren Nelson has learned it’s best not to hook up with DC Examiner gossip Patrick Gavin, because he’s just going to put it all in the paper. MORE »

Above, from the Examiner, Cocktober Surprise star Mark Foley’s caricature — still on display, loud and proud, at The Palm. MORE »

Today’ Note raises some interesting questions, among them:

Q: Is it really true that “the last Tuesday of every month is reserved for The Note’s ‘Best of . . .’ feature”?
A: No.

Q: Then why go through the trouble of using such a hackneyed format?
A: Because it’s easier than actually analyzing the news.

More secrets revealed after the jump.

MORE »