the end
Boehner Proudly Passes His Dumb Bill, Senate Immediately Suffocates It
What’s happening in the exciting/awful dullsville of dismantling America? Well, jaundiced boozebag John Boehner did just what his bosses told him — he even coordinated the extremist-corporate bill’s passage with the publication of some jackass propaganda posted under his byline at the National Review Online. But it didn’t matter, because the Senate immediately tabled the [...]
Nearly a Third of American Mortgages ‘Underwater’
The economic recovery continues to be a complete fiction, like the Harry Potter books but without all the fun sex magick. Unemployment is officially back to 9%, with real unemployment at 22%. Energy and food costs keep rising as jobless benefits run out and wages are stagnant for the lucky ducks who still earn a [...]
Death Panel Roller Coaster
Here’s something, to kill you with, after the Retirement Age is changed to “when you cannot stand up anymore, and your hands are gnarled wads of bone and skin flaps,” and Paul Ryan needs some way to lure you to the Death Panel: Free roller coaster! And it ends in death. Courtesy of our favorite [...]
The Gulf Coast: Come For the Dead Baby Dolphins, Stay and Get Sick
Almost a year after the worst oil spill in Recorded History, the picturesque Gulf Coast is once again teeming with life: From Mexico to Florida, small children are building sand condos, birds are squawking “thanks for cleaning all that oil off me, you guys rule,” and delicious popcorn shrimps are jumping out of the clean [...]
IRA Terrorist Peter King Now Wants To Take America’s Amateur Radio Band
We thought he was plenty busy hating on Muslims — and why can’t the Muslims just shut their halal-holes and enjoy America’s endless bloody pointless murderous wars against Muslim countries, anyway? — but Rep. Peter King is also trying to shut down America’s ham radio frequencies.
Larry King Finally Died Or Something
Wait, why did they give this guy a show? Oh, never mind. [YouTube]
U.S. Government Will Announce Space Monster Invasion Tomorrow
What did NASA send your Wonkette for some reason? Secret plans for the new Chevrolet space shuttle? A wacky “mash up” video of NASA accidents? No! It’s even better/worse than all that: “NASA will hold a news conference at 2 p.m. EST on Thursday, Dec. 2, to discuss an astrobiology finding that will impact the [...]
Dumb New GOP Website Actually a Heartbreaking Document of America’s Devastation
Lots of Wonkette readers sent us this embarrassing new GOP “America Speaking Out” website, because obviously we — as Americans who speak — should go flood this dumb thing with TruckNutz and whatever. Okay, that is a funny thing to do, on the Internet, but oh dear Jesus in Space why did you have to [...]
America Will Never Recover From This Recession, The End
There’s a cheery new article in the Atlantic about how this country will never ever recover and nobody will ever have jobs again — especially the youth and the “working class,” both of whom have actually been not having jobs while living pathetic wrecked lives for a decade or so before the Great Recession.
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