Tag Archives: that’s not racial transcendence

  cool story bro

Pennsylvania School Board President Sorry If You Were Offended By His Hilariously Racist Videos

Brad Rigler
We do not know much about what a school board president or member in Pennsylvania does, but there are two things we can say for sure you should not do if you hold one of those positions. One, don’t be a screeching gun nut who proudly uses pictures of Nancy Pelosi for target practice. And two, if you have a channel full of YouTube videos you created of yourself making (or pretending to make) racist prank phone calls, take them down before your school district finds out about them. Read more on Pennsylvania School Board President Sorry If You Were Offended By His Hilariously Racist Videos…
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments Of The Week: An Armed Society Will Teach Black Teens Some Manners

Scootaloo is neither a gun owner nor Jewish, as far as we know. She worships Rainbow Dash
It’s time for our weekly mucking-out of the ol’ comments queue — a chore that we manage to be more diligent about than we are when it comes to changing the water in our betta fish’s tank. Sorry about that, Flushy, but the slime is just a lot thicker in the comments queue. This week, we have some fresh steaming nonsense from a couple of Internet warriors who are quite unhappy at the life sentence handed to Florida sociopath Michael Dunn in the first-degree murder of Jordan Davis. According to one “Jim Smithill,” Jordan Davis got exactly what he deserved for being a black teenager in a vehicle that was rudely playing loud music — as we all know, it’s the thuggish rear-seat passengers who cause the most trouble: Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: An Armed Society Will Teach Black Teens Some Manners…
  A Fistful Of Dullards

Cliven Bundy And His One Black Friend Star In Weirdest Political Ad Of 2014 (Video)

Oh, sure, we’ve called several ads weird, or even the weirdest. We thought maybe we’d seen all the weird that could be seen when Minneapolis mayoral candidate Jeff Wagner walked out of a lake holding a coffee cup last year, but this thing we are about to unleash on you poor Wonkers… well, it just blows Jeff Wagner out of the water. Read more on Cliven Bundy And His One Black Friend Star In Weirdest Political Ad Of 2014 (Video)…
  Fear Of A Black Ballot

Study: White People, You’re Racist

Scene from several documentaries by Dinesh D'Souza
Here’s some fascinating Social Science Facts for your consideration! A University of Delaware study found that 67% of whites supported voter ID laws — but that support jumped to 73% when the question was accompanied by a photograph of African Americans voting (it was the same 67% when the question had no photo or a photo of whites voting). In a press release, researcher David C. Wilson of the Center for Political Communication said, Read more on Study: White People, You’re Racist…
  dead honky

St. Louis Sportsball Fans Chant ‘Africa! Africa!’ At Black Ferguson Protesters, Because They Are Nice

Do you sometimes look at the News coming out of our great nation and wonder who in Jesus’s name these people fucking are? Maybe it was the blonde lady screaming spittle-flecked curses at brown babies in Murrietta. Maybe it was Sean Hannity’s minions saying Trayvon Martin deserved to die. Or maybe you live in St. Louis, and you already know. Read more on St. Louis Sportsball Fans Chant ‘Africa! Africa!’ At Black Ferguson Protesters, Because They Are Nice…
  sorry seems to be the hardest word

Ferguson Police Chief Real Sorry Or Something, So That’s All Over Now

Mistakes were made
Attention, America: All of the fuss over the shooting of Michael Brown and the Keystone Stormtroopers police response is now taken care of, because Ferguson Police Chief Thomas Jackson is real sorry that he and his police department were a bunch of useless (but murdery!) jerks, and has issued a video apology to Brown’s parents and Ferguson’s black community, at least the well-behaved segment of it. Let’s watch the video and see if there’s anything Jackson leaves out! Read more on Ferguson Police Chief Real Sorry Or Something, So That’s All Over Now…
  Deepest Sympathies For Your Being Black

Alabama Governor Consoles Family Of Murdered 8-Year-Old Black Girl By Suggesting Their Dysfunction Killed Her (Updated)

May this face haunt Robert Benchley's dreams forever
UPDATE: A spokeswoman for Gov. Bentley has offered an explanation; see end of post. Hiawayi Robinson, of Pritchard, Alabama, a small city on the north side of Mobile, was looking forward to turning nine years old next week. On Tuesday, Hiawayi had talked to her father on the phone about what she wanted for her birthday (a laptop computer) and told him that she was going downstairs to see if her cousin was home. She never came back. Read more on Alabama Governor Consoles Family Of Murdered 8-Year-Old Black Girl By Suggesting Their Dysfunction Killed Her (Updated)…
  Falsifier Falsifier Trousers Aflame!

Hero Navy SEAL Kind Of Made Up Story About Getting Shot By 3 Big Scary Black Guys

Chris Heben shows off his wounds from the Race War
The nice gentleman with all the stitches up there is Chris Heben, of Medina, Ohio. He is a retired Navy SEAL who approaches life with the gusto you’d expect of an American Hero, which is why he has been a frequent guest expert on CNN and Fox News. As his website explains, “Immediately following the termination of Osama Bin Laden … Chris emerged as the news media’s most featured special operations subject matter expert.” Read more on Hero Navy SEAL Kind Of Made Up Story About Getting Shot By 3 Big Scary Black Guys…
  Don't Read The Comments

Sunday Bloody NYT Sunday: Child Labor’s Still Pretty Cool For Tobacco Growers

The best way to read your Sunday NYT
We depend on our Sunday New York Times for in-depth reporting on stuff that we may or may not care about, and on a good day we might even learn about something we had no idea we should have to care about, and now we can sound like a big know it all. Into that last column, let’s drop today’s story about teenagers who work 12-hour shifts on tobacco farms, like the 13-year-old we meet in the lede. But don’t worry, the growers provide safety equipment, of a sort: Read more on Sunday Bloody NYT Sunday: Child Labor’s Still Pretty Cool For Tobacco Growers…
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments Of The Day: Labor Day Loonies Edition

Dear Sir or Madame: I am outraged by the lack of variety in the .gifs on this blog!
Happy Labor Day, workers of the world! While you and your grillables marinate in anticipation of the big holiday Bar-B-Q/bonfire, we bring you these offerings from the comments queue. Just be careful not to leave them out too long — like mayonnaise, they go bad in the sun. Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Day: Labor Day Loonies Edition…
  Sunday Bloody New York Times Sunday

At The New York Times, A Slow News Day

Fred Stein, 'Children reading newspaper' 1936
Things have quieted down in Ferguson and we have a holiday weekend, so the New York Times is full of analysis-type stuff today. There’s a pretty good piece on Democrats’ attempts to mobilize African-American voters who are outraged over Michael Brown’s shooting (and another story about that effort in Ferguson, specifically). There’s also longish story about the Chinese Communist Party’s attempt to prevent Hong Kong from doing free-n-fair elections, which is both well-reported and interesting, but which we bet you won’t read because it is not sexxay, you laggards. Go on, we dare you! You probably can’t handle it! The big breaking news of the morning, we guess, is the St. Louis Rams’ cutting Michael Sam, and if you read the New York Times for sports news, that’s in there too. Read more on At The New York Times, A Slow News Day…
  Stop Resisting! Stop Resisting!

New Crime To Worry About: Sitting While Black

Even the three-fingered cops of the future are terrifying
In yet another completely isolated incident that has nothing to do with race, another black man has released a video of police going to town on him for being an uncooperative ne’er do well. In this case, the unruly offender is Christopher Lollie of St. Paul, Minnesota, who on Jan. 31 of this year was waiting to pick his kids up from daycare when confronted by a cop who wanted to know his name and why he was sitting down on a chair in a skyway in between two buildings. Like a troublemaker, he seemed to think he had the right to not give his name and ID to a police officer without her telling him what he’d done wrong — and then what he’d done wrong was to not comply with her “Papers, please” request, which marked him as a probable criminal threat with dreadlocks. Read more on New Crime To Worry About: Sitting While Black…
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Messages Of The Day: If You Read The Bible, You’d Know How Real Demons Are, You Moron

To the editors: I liked the old library better.
Time for another trip to the comments queue well, where we skim off the finest of our would-be commenters’ contributions. First up, a real treat: an actual good old-fashioned email sent to Yr. Doktor Zoom by “Vinbin76,” who had a bone to pick with us after we made fun of that dumb WND piece selling DVDs by claiming that Robin Williams committed suicide because of demonic possession. It’s a tad long, so we’ll tighten it up a bit. Vinbin76 takes a dim view of most Christians and an even dimmer view of Yr Doktor Zoom: Read more on Deleted Messages Of The Day: If You Read The Bible, You’d Know How Real Demons Are, You Moron…
  Be More Afraid Please

Evil Stupid Dick Explains Why Michael Brown Deserved To Die

He's a GANGSTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey, everybody, just stop feeling bad about the police in Ferguson, Missouri, shooting unarmed 18-year-old Michael Brown dead while he had his hands up — Jim Hoft, the Stupidest Man On the Internet, wants you all to know that it’s no big loss, since Michael Brown was a 100% certified GANGSTER who HAD A GUN (maybe, in a Facebook photo of a completely different person — give him time, and Hoft will probably start hinting that Brown had a gun when he was shot, too). While the photo above has been in circulation since shortly after Brown was shot, Our Stupid Hero appears to be the first to jump from “photographed gesturing like a rap gangster” to “was a GANGSTER.” Hoft has since backed off that original headline, of which Chris Johnson at Little Green Footballs wisely archived a copy at Webcitation in case Hoft “tries to edit it without admitting it.” Which Hoft did, of course. Read more on Evil Stupid Dick Explains Why Michael Brown Deserved To Die…
  rand paul is your new al sharpton america

Rand Paul Concedes Race For 2016 Republican Nomination

Ask not what you can do for others...ask what you can make others do for you
Rand Paul has done some opining about Ferguson, Missouri. It is some libertariany stuff you would expect about “big government” and militarizing the po-po and anyone who would give up liberty in the name of security deserves neither and hork hork hork what have you. But then Rand Paul starts talking about race, and not like he usually does, when he says the Civil Rights Act is some bullshit. Read more on Rand Paul Concedes Race For 2016 Republican Nomination…
  as far from nice time as it gets

White People Pretty Mad About Ferguson, Missouri, Looting. Black People Pretty Mad Boy Was Murdered By Cop.

Update: Everything's still terrible
Get ready for another thoughtful National Conversation On Race, which will go something like this: Person A: “A cop shot 18-year-old Michael Brown to death, although Brown wasn’t armed. I don’t buy the story that Brown just attacked as the cop was trying to get out of his car.” Person B: “Yeah, but the police don’t just shoot people for no reason, and Brown was dressed like a thug. Also, there was a riot after a “prayer vigil” last night, which just shows you These People are animals.” Person A: “At least we can agree that the facts are not all in yet.” Person B: “You’re absolutely right. I bet there’s all sorts of Facebook stuff showing that Brown liked violent rap music.” Read more on White People Pretty Mad About Ferguson, Missouri, Looting. Black People Pretty Mad Boy Was Murdered By Cop….
  Barack Ebola

Stupidest Men On The Internet: Obama Bringing Africans, Ebola, And Polygamy To America!

It is never the wrong time to panic
Jim Hoft, the Stupidest Man on the Internet, and Kristinn Taylor, the Stupidest Guest Blogger on the internet, have been having a nice pretend meltdown the last couple of days about how Barack Obama is recklessly trying to kill America with the Ebola virus by inviting a whole bunch of Africans — from Africa, the continent that has Ebola — to Our Nation’s Capital for a summit of African leaders next week and a meeting of influential young Africans this week. Not that they’re sensationalizing or anything; they just have articles with judicious, careful headlines that urge a note of caution: Read more on Stupidest Men On The Internet: Obama Bringing Africans, Ebola, And Polygamy To America!…
  not your average washed-up star

Someone Reminded Idaho Tribe Who Ted Nugent Is, So They Cancelled His Concert

looks like a tribute to the historic Native American tradition of blowing up breast cancer with grenades
In our “couldn’t happen to a nicer guy” file, we learn that the Coeur d’Alene Tribe cancelled a scheduled Ted Nugent concert shortly after being asked for a comment on the apparent irony of a Native American tribe hosting a guy known mostly for his paleolithic racist schtick. As best we can tell, the concert was booked by someone at the tribe who thought, “Oh yeah, ’70s rocker guy, sure,” but wasn’t particularly aware of what he’s been up to in the current millennium. And those haterz at the Southern Poverty Law Center were the monsters who are wrecking poor Ted’s free speech rights, since they were the ones who asked the question. Read more on Someone Reminded Idaho Tribe Who Ted Nugent Is, So They Cancelled His Concert…
  shit's fucked up y'all

Racist Official Is Oh Holy Sweet Jesus That’s So F***ing Racist

Are you a person of a duskier hue? Maybe one of our fellow Americans with a really “great tan”? Maybe, because of this variation in skin color from the sallow peachish color of many of us, your forebears actually had to “harvest” cotton, all forced-like. But did you know, friends of color, that according to this fine gentleman who is the chair of a housing authority in North Carolina, that you are lazy and the goodly folk who fought to keep you enslaved were “godly gentlemen”? Well, at least they never tried to enslave you with universal health care. #Outreach. Read more on Racist Official Is Oh Holy Sweet Jesus That’s So F***ing Racist…
  the white man's derpin'

Arizona Schools Chief Only Hates Your Bad Spanishes, Not Your Good Assimilated Spanishes

Hey, remember John Huppenthal, Arizona’s state schools superintendent, who trolled a bunch of blogs from his work computer, mostly talking about what a great job John Huppenthal was doing as state schools superintendent, but also explaining that the poor are “lazy pigs” and Margaret Sanger did the Holocaust? Turns out that more of his commenting history is being uncovered, like the time he explained that controlling immigration needs to be done, but that we also need to make sure that those dumb immigrants straighten up and fly right, in English. Read more on Arizona Schools Chief Only Hates Your Bad Spanishes, Not Your Good Assimilated Spanishes…
  perfect hero of the day

Race-Conscious Four-Year-Old Saves Unjustly Accused Black Man From Racist Jerk Babysitter Robber

Are you a babysitter? Are you the kind of asshole who lets her boyfriend in to rob and plunder the Wilsons or whoever while you’re eating all the shrimp cocktail? (No judgment on the shrimp cocktail, dude, just the ROBBING AND RACSIMING.) Maybe do not blame the robbery on the black next door neighbor, DICK, if your small charge was awake and spyin’ the whole time like Cindy Lou Who. Read more on Race-Conscious Four-Year-Old Saves Unjustly Accused Black Man From Racist Jerk Babysitter Robber…
  Mississippi Derping

Mississippi Teabaggers Will Be On Lookout For Scary Negro Voters In Primary Runoff

Tomorrow is the runoff election for the Great Mississippi Ratfuck — aka the Republican Senate Primary — between Terrible Old Clueless Thad Cochran and up-and-coming neoconfederate grifterweasel Chris McDaniel. Needless to say, it’s managing to remain horrible right up to the very end! In an effort to get someone, anyone to vote for him, Cochran has been reaching out to black voters, and so McDaniel supporters are getting ready to march to the polls to protect them from interfering Democrats who shouldn’t be messing with a Republican primary — even though it’s an open primary, and the only people disqualified from voting in it would be those who already voted in the Democratic primary. Mind you, it’s not about race, because it is never about race. Read more on Mississippi Teabaggers Will Be On Lookout For Scary Negro Voters In Primary Runoff…