Tag: texas

Who Texas Ag Commissioner Gonna Call? Dr. Feelgood! Feelgood Make You Feel All Right!

He also once married his 15-year-old stepdaughter.

On A Scale Of One To Sarah Huckabee Sanders: Wonkagenda For Wed., March 28, 2018

Robert Mueller wants to keep his snitches in jail, Sarah Huckabee Sanders poots some lies about the census, and Sacramento is going to see some UNREST. Your morning news brief.

Austin Bomber Blows Self Up

Somehow, the Russia investigation didn't distract the FBI from finding this guy.

Austin Bomber May Or May Not Be White Supremacist Dickhole But We’re Guessing He Is

What's a little domestic terrorism between friends?

Trump Just Yammering About Some Made-Up Shit. Wonkagenda For Thurs., March 15, 2018

Trump just making shit up, Congress pusses out for big money (again), and Nikki Haley says mean things to Russia. Your morning news brief.

March Goes Out With A Lamb! Wonkagenda For Wed., March 14, 2018

Conor Lamb wins, Dems release their MINORITY REPORT, and Antifa Space Soldiers!

Ted Cruz Being Hilarious Dick Again, Plus All Your Texas Primary Action!

Somewhere, Molly Ivins is smiling.

Storm A-Comin’. Wonkagenda For Wed., March 7, 2018

Democrats flood the Texas primaries, Gary Cohn runs from Washington, and Stormy Daniels might have some dick pics. Your morning news brief.

Texas Arrests ‘False Flag’ Jerks Harassing Pastor Whose Daughter Was Shot, For Being Stupid Idiots

'What we call reality is more of a collective hunch' -- Lily Tomlin

Make Dumpster Diving Great Again! Wonkagenda For Mon., March 5, 2018

Trump gets serious about trade war, Trump-Russia goes to the Middle East, and Philando Castile is still helping feed poor kids. Your morning news brief.

Dear Pissed-Off High School Kids: If Adults Threaten To Punish You For Protesting, FUCKING DO IT ANYWAY

A Wonkette Public Service Announcement for the teens of America!

Donald Trump Will Have To Find Another Crazy Coal Hugger For Top Environmental Job

Now she'll have to go back to denying climate change in private industry. If there's any work in that area.
It's a fair cop

Texas Judge Was On Mission FROM GOD!

If God didn't intervene in Christ's trial, why would He be so interested in a Texas court? Mysterious ways, man.

No, Trump Voter Fraud Commission Didn’t Want List Of All Texas’s Hispanicos! It Was Just A Mistake By The Guy With The Child Porn!

It's just one bad actor, nothing to see here. Or completely innocent cross-checking, that too.