Tag: texas

Genius Texas Hunters Shoot Each Other, Blame Invisible Mexicans, As One Does. Your Open Thread!

Somebody needs to build a wall in Texas. Around idiot paranoid gun-humpers.

When Texas Senator Tells Little Lady To Shut Her Mouth, She’ll Shut Her Fucking Mouth, Ya Hear?

When the gavel goes UP, the mouth goes SHUT.

Whom Are We Deporting Today?

The World Is Terrible!!! Let us distract you from this Deportationpalooza with Cat Porn!

How Are ‘Pro-Life’ Republicans Screwing Disabled Kids Now? A VERY MAD STORY

You may want to take steps to keep from hurling your computer or mobile device across the room before you read this one.

‘She Was Warned.’ Wonkagenda For Wed., Feb. 8, 2017

Elizabeth Warren won't sit down, Jake Tapper gets snippy with Kellyanne Conway, and Betsy DeVos will shove your kids full of Jesus. Your morning news brief!

War With Mexico? Ai Yi Yi! Wonkagenda For Thurs., Feb. 2, 2017

Trump insults Australia, Betsy DeVos might fail, and oh, we're going to war with Mexico? Caliente! Your morning news brief!
Early draft obtained by Wonkette

Texas State Rep. Just Wants To Poll Muslims On How Terroristy They Are. Is That Wrong?

No wonder Texas loons weren't going insane about this last year. It's a biennial event.

Rick Perry Sorry For Being Idiot, Will Definitely Not Try Harder Next Time

Remember that time Rick Perry enjoyed playing on the couch with Al Franken? Rick Perry remembers.

Hollywood Pees On Donald Trump’s Golden Rug. Wonkagenda for Monday, January 9, 2016

Senators are gearing up for confirm-a-palooza, K street is being flooded by Trumpkins, and Meryl Streep leaves Trump with butthurt. Your morning news brief!

New Year’s Eve ‘Celebratory Gunfire’ Ends Poorly Across The Nation, Shockingly Enough

What if there were a way to celebrate the New Year without doing something that could kill or maim someone?

Obama Saves Alaska! Wonkagenda For Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Obama saves Alaska, Trump's spawn tried steal some cash, and Chris Christie just got screwed! Your Daily News Brief

Good Thing This Boy Wasn’t Racist

A young man who raped a black, mentally disabled teammate with a coat hanger will not receive jail time, because none of the following was a hate crime: As previously reported by The Root, the suit claims Howard...

Electoral College Officially As Dumb As Typical Trump Supporter

Late Monday afternoon, Texas electors pushed Trump over 270 votes, because of course it was Texas.
Ground Control To Governor Moonbeam...

California Gov. Jerry Brown Is Having None Of Trump’s Climate Crap

Governor Moonbeam is back, and he rocks.

Trump Idiot At Chili’s Makes America Great Again All Over Black Veteran

A new problem to worry about: Trump-inspired restaurant vigilantes.