Tag Archives: terrorism

  Accurate reporting is a liberal conspiracy!

Mean Federal Judge Won’t Let James O’Keefe Sue For Libel Just Because He Wasn’t Libeled, Unfair!

Behind that mask is a very sad face.
Rightwing dildo-lube-boat-enthusiast James O’Keefe is being oppressed again by activist judges and the mean liberal media. An obviously terrible judge has struck down his libel case arising from his infamous (failed) attempt to pretend to be a phone company worker for the purposes of sneaking into then-Louisiana Senator Mary Landrieu’s office so O’Keefe could, we don’t know … bug it? Mess with her phone lines? Kidnap the senator and take her on a dildo lube boat ride to hell? You never know with “journalists” like O’Keefe! Whatever it was, O’Keefe and his rarely sexed pals were charged with tampering with phone lines, and they pleaded out on a lesser misdemeanor charge of simply trying to get into a federal facility using the age-old tactic of lying. Read more on Mean Federal Judge Won’t Let James O’Keefe Sue For Libel Just Because He Wasn’t Libeled, Unfair!…
  grifter gotta grift

James O’Keefe Totally Pwns Catholic College For Loving ISIS And Terrorism. Obviously.

Who wants to take one for the team, ladies?
Whey-faced adult virgin James O’Keefe (or his publicist) has been spamming us to take a look at his latest video allegedly exposing another college campus for being a hotbed of ISIS-supporting terrorist love. That way, he can fundraise by saying “Liberal blog Wonkette is attacking us because they are afraid of the truth that Project Veritas reveals yarrrrgle blargle poop!” Well, us liberals love to help out losers and their lost causes, so let’s give him a boost! Read more on James O’Keefe Totally Pwns Catholic College For Loving ISIS And Terrorism. Obviously….
  Load Up On Guns And Bring Your Friends -- Again

Ted Cruz Loves Good Old Country Music Because 9/11 And Also Pandering

‘John, let’s do a shot for the warden.’ And for the junior Senator from Texas.
Now this is some carefully targeted pandering! In an interview with CBS This Morning, Ted Cruz explained that the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, completely changed his taste in music, apparently because classic rock failed to meet his anger needs: Read more on Ted Cruz Loves Good Old Country Music Because 9/11 And Also Pandering…
  Looks Like I Picked The Wrong Day To Stop Sniffing Glue

TSA Let A Known Terrorist Fly. Who Was It, Besides Obama?

Langley, are you SURE this guy had I.D.?
Today’s big Air Travel Freakout is that the Transportation Security Agency apparently allowed someone very bad to board a commercial airliner last year, and they let the very bad person board without taking his very bad shoes off, even though he (or she! feminism!) was recognized by a TSA officer, triple exclamation points!!! Read more on TSA Let A Known Terrorist Fly. Who Was It, Besides Obama?…
  He's Seen Some Things Man

Scott Walker Knows How To Beat ISIS: Slash Their Pension Benefits

ISIS is pretty much just a teacher's union with rocket propelled grenades, after all
In his speech to CPAC Thursday night, Scott Walker let America know that he’s ready to handle international relations without wasting any time on diplomacy, explaining how his experience in crushing public-employee unions makes him the perfect choice to take on international terrorism: Read more on Scott Walker Knows How To Beat ISIS: Slash Their Pension Benefits…
  "intelligence" not the operative word here

Wingnuts So Mad About Report On Right-Wing Terrorism, They Just Might Shoot Something

The threat is real.
Cue yet another wingnut shitfit. CNN reports that the Department of Homeland Security has recently circulated a new “intelligence assessment” examining the danger of domestic terrorism from the right-wing “sovereign citizen” movement. This of course means that the President Oblackblack stooges who run DHS think that all right-wingers are fanatic terrorists worse than Islamists, QED. Read more on Wingnuts So Mad About Report On Right-Wing Terrorism, They Just Might Shoot Something…
  Whine and Jesus Party

Saturday Night Live Discriminated All Over Victoria Jackson’s Free Gay-Hating Speech

Let's get both these kids in the next Wes Anderson movie
Like many Americans who now regret it, we watched the great big Saturday Night Live 40th anniversary program Sunday, and we kept looking over at our 17-year-old son and explaining that the show didn’t so much suck as that it was just trying to recreate the feel of every single sketch that ran after “Weekend Update” for 40 years. And of course, we kept an eye out for former cast members who didn’t quite make it onstage, like Sen. Al Franken, who was definitely there, and Victoria Jackson, who was nowhere to be seen. WELL! Turns out that V-Jack was there all right, but she was shunted off into the overflow room, not given a seat in the studio audience. She’s not sure why that happened, but she bets it’s maybe because she’s a Christian who stands up for Traditional Marriage! Or maybe some young’un on the production staff just confused her with another crazy blond lady from the internet and worried that she’d storm the stage, grab the mic, and shout that America would never submit to Muslim rule. Read more on Saturday Night Live Discriminated All Over Victoria Jackson’s Free Gay-Hating Speech…
  Warmed-Over Science Denial

Fox News: Science Is A Hoax That Steals Our Freedom And Driving Privileges

God, that's just so dumb. Doesn't Obama even care that Americans are DYING?
Fox News found yet another reason to declare President Barack Obama totally DUMM Wednesday, because the stupidhead president made a factual statement that is also totally outrageous and stupid. In his recent interview with Vox, Obama said that yes, terrorism is bad and serious, but the media also exaggerates the threat of terrorism to the average American because it makes for good television, while threats like climate change, which will affect everyone on the planet, don’t get as much coverage because they don’t make for exciting TV. Read more on Fox News: Science Is A Hoax That Steals Our Freedom And Driving Privileges…
  It Only Stands To Reason (But He's Sitting)

Tea Party Hero Sen. Tom Cotton Says Gitmo Doesn’t Recruit Terrorists, Because LOGIC

Teabagger Tom Cotton, an actual elected senator from Arkansas, proved this week that, contrary to media reports and the lies of actual terrorists, there is absolutely no way anyone in the Muslim world has ever been moved to take up arms (or suicide vests, or car bombs) against America because of the prison at Guantanamo Bay. Read more on Tea Party Hero Sen. Tom Cotton Says Gitmo Doesn’t Recruit Terrorists, Because LOGIC…
  pee-drinkin' patriots

Todd Starnes Has Some Thoughts On American Jesus We Mean American Sniper

I see dead people.
Here’s a true story about Todd Starnes. Recently, I was at a party and mentioned that I was writing about Todd Starnes. The person I was talking to didn’t quite know who Todd Starnes was until I said, “People make jokes about him drinking pee on Twitter. Pee jokes guy. Big hat.” Then she was like “ohh, that guy! Yeah. That’s the only reason I know who he is. The pee jokes.” So good work everyone, I guess. Read more on Todd Starnes Has Some Thoughts On American Jesus We Mean American Sniper…
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments Of The Day: You Youngsters Know Nothing Of Ronald Reagan’s Work

Scootaloo is neither a gun owner nor Jewish, as far as we know. She worships Rainbow Dash
It’s been a little while since we’ve skimmed the foam off the top of the waste lagoon that is our Comments Queue, and so let’s see what’s bubbled to the top. Please make sure you’re wearing OSHA-compliant eye and cerebral cortex protection. Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Day: You Youngsters Know Nothing Of Ronald Reagan’s Work…
  And Lawyers Are Like Pipe Bombs Or Something

California School Board Must Read Bible At Meetings Or The Terrorists Win

Don't mind me. Just sitting in. Hey, kids, want some loaves and fishes? I have extra
The school board of Chino, California, is being sued by the mean old Freedom From Religion Foundation (FFRF) just because it likes to open its meetings with a few prayers to Jesus. Plus some proselytizing during board meetings, and, OK, offering Bible classes taught with materials from a church, too. Members of the board are pretty sure they’re just doing what George Washington and Jesus want, which is to make sue that God isn’t excluded from public life. At a meeting last week, during which the board voted to seek an attorney to volunteer to defend the case, one board member compared the lawsuit to the recent terrorist attacks in France, because of course the First Amendment is a lot like an automatic rifle. Read more on California School Board Must Read Bible At Meetings Or The Terrorists Win…
  Vladimir Putin Feeling Neglected

Republicans Have Massive Freedom Boner For Egypt’s Dictator

Why can't we have a nice military dictator too?
Attention, Wonkers: We’re proud to announce that the American right has a new Strongman Boyfriend! They seem to have a real crush on Egyptian President Gen. Abdel Fattah al-Sisi, who seized power in the 2013 coup against Mohammed Morsi. Lots of wingers love him because he outlawed the Muslim Brotherhood and made the trains run on time, or at least he outlawed the Muslim Brotherhood. And even better, as Sen. Lindsey Graham noted over the weekend, al-Sisi recognizes the need for an actual religious war against radical Islam, while Barack Obama pretends that terrorists aren’t even Muslims at all, and won’t even say the words “radical Islam,” except for the times that Obama has actually said “radical Islam.” Read more on Republicans Have Massive Freedom Boner For Egypt’s Dictator…
  Your Morning Maddow

Morning Maddow: It’s Anonymous Versus ‘ISIS’ In Battle Of The Nerds (Video)

Rachel's doing her 'splainer gestures a lot tonight
Monday, somebody claiming to be affiliated with ISIS — or at least friendly to them — briefly took over social media accounts for the Pentagon’s Central Command, and posted some stupid threatening-sounding stuff about jihad, as well as a bunch of documents they claimed were classified, but were actually publicly available information. No real security breach, but weird and scary. Read more on Morning Maddow: It’s Anonymous Versus ‘ISIS’ In Battle Of The Nerds (Video)…
  Must Be A Day Ending In Y

Literally Every Sentence David Brooks Says About Paris Shootings Is Wrong (VIDEO)

David Brooks Is Wrong
Sometimes David Brooks says things that are true or correct. However, this does not occur in the above clip from Meet the Press, a popular television fiasco. Not even once! Can we divide David Brooks’ clump of TV words into complete sentences and explain why each of them is wrong? We can. Read more on Literally Every Sentence David Brooks Says About Paris Shootings Is Wrong (VIDEO)…
  Your Morning Maddow

Morning Maddow: Paris Attackers Didn’t Just Come Out of Nowhere, Imagine That (Video)

Friday’s Rachel Maddow Show led off with the kind of reporting you don’t see enough of, but that you’d think 24-hour news would be ideally suited for: a fairly in-depth look at the modern history of terror by Islamic radicals in France (which is also wrapped up with that country’s former colony, Algeria), and how it connects to the attacks in Paris last week. As it turns out, two of the terrorists in that attack were involved in a failed 2010 prison break plot to free one of the perpetrators of a 1995 train station bombing in Paris. It’s fascinating stuff, and a reminder that terrorism and terrorists don’t just come out of nowhere. And no, Fox News, knowing the history and motivations is not “making excuses” for terrorism. Read more on Morning Maddow: Paris Attackers Didn’t Just Come Out of Nowhere, Imagine That (Video)…
  Yup this should work

Republicans Demand Obama Declare Holy War, Invade France

Good plan
It used to be that Republicans wouldn’t have to hate President Obama so much if only he had the Dad Jeans to call terrorist attacks by their rightful name, which he has never done. But that was ages ago, and now that the president, ever the appeaser, has started using the T-word for the first time ever, there’s a whole new standard. Sure, the president said the slaughter at Parisian satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo’s office was a “terrorist attack” and that his administration would “help bring these terrorists to justice.” But that’s still sort of wishy-washy in today’s even more terroristical climate, don’t you think? How do we know he really, truly understands the seriousness of a terrorist attack if he’s only willing to call it a terrorist attack? Read more on Republicans Demand Obama Declare Holy War, Invade France…
  Derp Overload

How Are Wingnuts Reacting To Paris Massacre? You’d Be Surprised! (No You Wouldn’t)

And Billo was one of the more restrained ones
While Parisians took to the streets with their “Je Suis Charlie” signs yesterday to quietly express solidarity with the murdered satirists and bystanders at the offices of Charlie Hebdo, the American Wingnut-Industrial Complex was in Full Panic Mode, explaining exactly why we all need to pay attention to this horrific terrorist act by three people that all Muslims bear responsibility for. Fox News’s Bill O’Reilly actually offered one of the tamer bits of stupid on the attack, complaining that when he condemned the murders, Barack Obama was actually downplaying the Muslim threat. The president had expressed confidence that France’s commitment to freedom of speech “is something that can’t be silenced by the senseless violence of the few.” Ah, but Mr. Obama has it all wrong, said O’Reilly: Read more on How Are Wingnuts Reacting To Paris Massacre? You’d Be Surprised! (No You Wouldn’t)…