Tag: ten commandments

Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore Suspended For ‘Bad At Law.’ Here Is A Sexxx Song About Him!

Judy Rogers is your new favorite contemporary Christian artist. Also, Roy Moore got suspended for telling the Supreme Court it's not the boss of him. (It is.)
Guys with beards this epic are either brilliant or fucking nuts

Arkansas Gentleman In Jail Just For Loving Bible Too Much, Threatening To Kill Seven Mayors

Guy who threatened seven mayors insisted that learning the 10 Commandments along with his ABCs made him the man he is today. Hmm.

Uh Oh, Is Hobby Lobby Going To Hell For Stealing All God’s Cool Stuff?

Hobby Lobby, the arts-n-farts store where stay-at-home mommy vloggers buy all their NO HOMO glitter and scrapbooking supplies, is the pinnacle of Christian values and American virtue, which are basically the same thing, if you squint at the First Amendment...
At least now they can explain every tornado for the next ten years

Ten Commandments Removed From Oklahoma Capitol, Governor Would Kill To Get Them Back

The day after workers yanked the big ol' Ten Commandments Monument from the Oklahoma Capitol grounds and moved it to a conservative think tank, Oklahoma Gov. Mary Fallin called on the state legislature to pass an amendment to the...
There. Much better without that nonsense

Tennessee Republican Demands Schools Delete Islam From History, Because 9/11

To mark the anniversary of the attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon, Tennessee state Rep. Andy Holt is calling on the state to revise the history of Islam out of its social studies standards, because obviously...

BREAKING: Televangelist Scamster Pat Robertson Has Never Actually Read The Bible

Gather round, kidlets, time for another edition of What Do The Voices Say In Crazy Uncle Pat's Brain Parts? On a recent episode of Pat Robertson's Jesus Hour, a viewer named "Viewer" -- no, seriously, they didn't even bother to...
The monument is 6 feet high, so that man and buggy must be HUGE

Oklahoma Gov. Mary Fallin To State Supreme Court: You Are Not The Boss Of Her!

In what has to be a huge surprise to some single-celled organisms who didn't know any better, Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin has decided to ignore last week's order by the state Supreme Court to remove the giant Ten Commandments...
Note th' Illuminati symbol over th' Eagle!!!

Oklahoma Supreme Court Murders God

In your Separation of Church and State Nice Time, the Oklahoma Supreme Court ruled Tuesday that a Ten Commandments monument at the state Capitol building has to be removed, because it violates the Oklahoma Constitution, never mind the U.S....
Jason Rapert points at homosexuals.

Arkansas Senator Dude Tired Of Homos Parading About During Sunday Church Services

Arkansas state Sen. Jason Rapert has had thoughts again! We last heard from him when he was helpfully trying to get a Ten Commandments monument constructed on the grounds of the Arkansas state capitol, for "historical reasons," because, like,...
Awwww, he's cute, doesn't look near as stupid as his Daddy.

Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore’s Offspring Arrested For Being Good Christian, Also Drugs

It's very difficult these days, managing a career devoted to mangling the lives of LGBT people you've never met, and also raising your own children. Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore knows this struggle well, as he seems...
They totally used these sets again in Star Trek, didn't they?

Shiny 10 Commandments Sure To Distract Arkansas From Godly ‘Rehoming’ Kid-Dumper Guy

Hey, how about we take a short break from the loathsome child-abandoning Arkansas state Rep. Justin Harris, so we can bring you another completely different loathsome member of the Arkansas House, state Rep. Jason Rapert? Mr. Rapert apparently worries...

Alabama’s Roy Moore Will Appeal SCOTUS Marriage Ruling Directly To God

America's most esteemed jurist, Alabama Supreme Court Justice Roy Moore, is not giving up his fight to save Alabama from the hordes of gays currently destroying the state by having equal marriage rights. Even though a terrible federal judge...
Judge DePiazza

Hero Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore Will Block Gay Courthouse Door, For Freedom

Fellow Patriots®, are you tired of the gay agenda being rammed down your throat? Are you afraid that the repeated joyous celebrations of legalized gay marriage exploding all over your face will give you gay herpes of the eye?...
Here's the story, of a crazy lady, who was talking to a devil to her right ...

In Surprising Farewell Address, Michele Bachmann Admits Liking Freedom, God

Michele Bachmann gave her farewell address to the House of Representatives Tuesday, and while we were worried that she might just stand up and announce that all her email should be forwarded to Shelly@CrazyEyes.com, she actually did deliver a...

Satanic Temple Getting The Devil All Over Florida Now

In a victory for something, we guess, our favorite Separation Of Church And State trolls at the completely serious "Satanic Temple" have succeeded in winning a place for their "Fallen Angel" diorama in the Florida State Capitol. You may...
As far as we can tell, this guy is completely serious.

Texas Gets The Moses-Wrote-The-Constitution Textbooks It Deserves

You may recall that back in September, we told you about some of the fascinating textbooks being written to conform to Texas's cool new history standards, which the conservative Fordham Institute called "a confusing, unteachable hodgepodge." The textbooks had...