Tag: television

Gingrich Accuses Romney Campaign of Being a Campaign

Giant toddler Newt Gingrich is in full crybaby force today, effectively doing a number on himself while attempting to do a number on vague front-runner Mitt Romney. On the CBS Early Show this morning, Gingrich sort of called Mitt...

‘Hungry Child’ Sesame Street Muppet To Entertain Actual Hungry Children

Because so many millions of American children are plopped in front of the teevee to watch Sesame Street instead of getting any breakfast, what with 45 million people on food stamps and tens of millions with no jobs and...

Glenn Beck TV Is Just Video Of Him Doing His Radio Show

Professional whiner nutcase Glenn Beck announced that he will charge a monthly five-dollar subscription fee for viewers to log in to his latest online vanity project, GBTV.com. Does anyone even have five dollars anymore? Maybe some quarters in the...

Here’s a Title Card/Test Pattern For Wonkette Videos

We'll just hide this in plain sight, a few pages back from the front.

WaPo: This Terrorist Investigation Is Just Like ’24’! BUT DIFFERENT, TOO?

Your Wonkette just went to the Washington Post website to see if it had anything about a supposed Dodd-Shelby financial reform deal. Maybe it does! But this was higher-up and a "must-click": "Parallels to '24': N.Y. police commissioner measures...

Levi Johnston Might Get His Own Show, Too!

It used to be that an ambitious, semiliterate Alaskan had just one route to fame: strike it big while pannin' fer goald and be immortalized in a poem by Robert Service. But recent history shows that all you have...

Arizona Senator Makes 878,967,542-9th Teevee Appearances Of Year, Today

Judging from how hard television producers have already worked to book John McCain on their shows this year, to discuss topics he doesn't give a flying fuck about, like health care or domestic policy in general or really anything...

Tom DeLay’s Kid Begs People To Vote Eight Times For Her Dad

Something is very wrong with this Tom DeLay appearance on Dancing With The Stars, beyond the surreal fact that it's even happening, in real life. Some folks have sent us an e-mail to the "Dancing With Delay" mailing list...

IMPORTANT 9/11- AND WHOOPI GOLDBERG-RELATED INFORMATION: Next up on Rudy Giuliani's eight-year September 11th press junket: an appearance on The View, on 9/11! Never forget... to set your DVRs.

WHY DOES MICHELLE OBAMA HATE OUR NATION'S PROVIDERS OF TELEVISION ENTERTAINMENT? "She said that she had instituted what she called 'Camp Obama' at the White House, which means that the TV and computer stay off all day until after...

Famous Marijuana Actor To Work In White House

Those of you that watch the television drama House noticed last night that famous actor Kal Penn's character committed suicide. Oh yes, uh, SPOILER ALERT, a few words ago. Well guess what, he's not dead in real life, yet!...

Do Not Be Alarmed By Explosions Tomorrow

Hey, this is nifty! If you see a 20- to 30-foot fireball on the Potomac, fear not, it is just some special effects crew working on a teevee show about our exciting FBI. Filming is set for 9:30 AM...

Hollywood Fred Thompson Shall Return To TV!

Boys and girls, it's a Thanksgiving miracle -- six days early! Our beloved Fred Thompson, the languid, pedicured Southern dandy who made a very sleepy run at the Presidency for about two weeks before returning to his cognacs and...

Obama Assaults Elderly Woman In New Commercial

Barack Obama has a new ad called "Dignity," and it is all about what a candidate loses in the process of running for President. Ha ha, just kidding! But the part in the end where he strangles the old...

YouTube: A Place For Liberals