television
Thad McCotter Interrupts Tragicomic Midlife Crisis To Conquer Hollywood With Terrible Teevee Pilot
Thad McCotter’s downward spiral from Congressman/vanity presidential candidate to publicly humiliated wretch of a man continues. Unable to purchase even 50 votes at the Iowa Straw Poll or collect enough (valid) petition signatures to run for re-election, McCotter has been reduced to writing a script for a faux-variety show based on Martin Mull’s 1977 “Fernwood [...]
Michelle Obama Jumps Rope To Amusement of Obese Kelly Ripa Fans
Why hello, FLOTUS fans. Have you been wondering what your First Lady Michelle Antoinette Obama has been up to the past few weeks? Anything particularly scandalous aside from hanging out on Pinterest looking at pictures of smoothies and going around, giving advice to hopelessly unemployed college graduates? Oh, here is something to freak out about: [...]
To Which Television Job Is This Latest Vapid Political Daughter Entitled?
Abby Huntsman is the 26-year-old daughter of Utah owner and 94th-place finisher in the 2012 Republican primaries, Jon Huntsman. She made a couple of wacky YouTubes with her two sisters (“hehe, look at how funny we are, we’re so crazy, aren’t we precious?”) before her father lost, in shame. And now, what’s this, she wants [...]
Gingrich Accuses Romney Campaign of Being a Campaign
Giant toddler Newt Gingrich is in full crybaby force today, effectively doing a number on himself while attempting to do a number on vague front-runner Mitt Romney. On the CBS Early Show this morning, Gingrich sort of called Mitt Romney a LIAR. This followed some other not-nice-to-Mitt comments he made on last night’s Piers Morgan [...]
‘Hungry Child’ Sesame Street Muppet To Entertain Actual Hungry Children
Because so many millions of American children are plopped in front of the teevee to watch Sesame Street instead of getting any breakfast, what with 45 million people on food stamps and tens of millions with no jobs and other economic unpleasantness, the folks at the Children’s Television Workshop will introduce a sad new muppet [...]
Glenn Beck TV Is Just Video Of Him Doing His Radio Show
Professional whiner nutcase Glenn Beck announced that he will charge a monthly five-dollar subscription fee for viewers to log in to his latest online vanity project, GBTV.com. Does anyone even have five dollars anymore? Maybe some quarters in the couch cushions. What will a Glenn Beck fan get in exchange for putting off the trip [...]
Here’s a Title Card/Test Pattern For Wonkette Videos
We’ll just hide this in plain sight, a few pages back from the front.
WaPo: This Terrorist Investigation Is Just Like ’24′! BUT DIFFERENT, TOO?
Your Wonkette just went to the Washington Post website to see if it had anything about a supposed Dodd-Shelby financial reform deal. Maybe it does! But this was higher-up and a “must-click”: “Parallels to ’24′: N.Y. police commissioner measures country’s success against Jack Bauer’s fictional heroics on FOX drama.” Ha ha, no he doesn’t though! [...]
Levi Johnston Might Get His Own Show, Too!
It used to be that an ambitious, semiliterate Alaskan had just one route to fame: strike it big while pannin’ fer goald and be immortalized in a poem by Robert Service. But recent history shows that all you have to do is be willing to depart your beloved Meth Capital of Wasilla and either 1) [...]
Arizona Senator Makes 878,967,542-9th Teevee Appearances Of Year, Today
Judging from how hard television producers have already worked to book John McCain on their shows this year, to discuss topics he doesn’t give a flying fuck about, like health care or domestic policy in general or really anything non-deathbomby, he will now probably be on most television shows at all times for the next [...]
Tom DeLay’s Kid Begs People To Vote Eight Times For Her Dad
Something is very wrong with this Tom DeLay appearance on Dancing With The Stars, beyond the surreal fact that it’s even happening, in real life. Some folks have sent us an e-mail to the “Dancing With Delay” mailing list from DeLay’s daughter, Dani DeLay Ferro, who, like her father, does not exactly have a saint’s [...]
IMPORTANT 9/11- AND WHOOPI GOLDBERG-RELATED INFORMATION: Next up on Rudy Giuliani’s eight-year September 11th press junket: an appearance on The View, on 9/11! Never forget… to set your DVRs. [Ben Smith]
Do Not Be Alarmed By Explosions Tomorrow
Hey, this is nifty! If you see a 20- to 30-foot fireball on the Potomac, fear not, it is just some special effects crew working on a teevee show about our exciting FBI. Filming is set for 9:30 AM till noon on Wednesday near the Key Bridge.
blog advertising is good for you
