Tag: televangelists

God's financial analyst.

Televangelist Assholes Pretty Sure Manchester And London Asking For It, Like Common Godless Sluts

BREAKING NEWS Pat Robertson and Jim Bakker are disgusting assholes.

Trump’s Jesus Advisor Will Resurrect Your Dead Relatives For Low, Low Price of $1,144!

Paula White would like to sell you some magic beans!

Will Elite Jack-Booted Thugs Impose Martial Law To Stop Donald Trump? Jim Bakker Thinks So!

All these un-American types who hate Donald Trump and also FREEDOM and probably KITTENS and PUPPIES are going to do a false-flag attack to stop Trump from being president, oh no!

Pat Robertson Would Like To Starve All The Drug Addicts To Death, Just Like Jesus Would Have

WHOA IF TRUE, but we don't think Pat Robertson understands the Bible.

Your Aborted Baby Will Go To Heaven And Play Harps For Huggy Jesus

It must have been tough to make fun of televangelists on the regular back in the day. You could probably only watch three or four of them a weekend, tops, before you'd get blackout drunk or blow your brains...
He Declared Bankruptcy For Your Sins

Donald Trump Is Yoogest Evangelical, Also A Jew For Jesus Maybe

More big Donald Trump news today: Now that he's finally found a Bible verse he likes (even if it doesn't exist), he is doing his very best to suck up to the wackiest fringes of the evangelist movement. Not necessarily the...
God's financial analyst.

You’re Off The Hook, China. Pat Robertson Says Stock Markets Crashing Because Of Abortion

Just like all U.S. Americans, Pat Robertson woke up Monday morning to news that the stock market is kinda batshit right now. It's plunging! Then rallying, kind of! Then dipping again! By the time you read this, only Jesus...

Caption Contest: What Is TBN Loon Paul Crouch Up To In Jerusalem?

So here is what is purportedly an undoctored photo of televangelist Paul "No, My Wife Jan is a Different Person From Tammy Faye Bakker" Crouch of Trinity Broadcast Network, giving the finger for some reason to his camera crew...

Televangelist Explains How His Jebus Books Brought Down The Berlin Wall

You may have thought that the Berlin Wall was brought down by the economic and political bankruptcy of the East German government in 1989, or maybe because of the impromptu actions of enthusiastic Berliners who just kind of...

Televangelists Jan and Paul Crouch Live Like Jesus With $100,000 Motorhome For Their Dogs

Oh whoops, Trinity Broadcasting Network and superduper good Christians Jan and Paul Crouch are getting sued (again) and this time it involves a whistleblower who noticed things like their $50 million jet, the $100,000 motorhome for their dogs, and...

Weirdo God Kills Birds To Show Disapproval of DADT Repeal

We haven't spent a lot of time on this "birds dropping out of the sky" (landing?)/general death of animals thing; but it's ok, because this televangelist woman has done the work for us, and has come up with the...