Tag Archives: teleprompter

  He'll be here all week and try the veal

Dumb Obama Needs Mike Huckabee To Explain Racism To Him Again

Obama needs to watch more Fox News, obviously
Last week, President Obama committed the impeachable high crime of saying some historically accurate things at the National Prayer Breakfast about how Christians have also done some terrorism and violence and bad things in the name of spreading their faith, and they have not been perfect all the time since the first year of anno domini. Read more on Dumb Obama Needs Mike Huckabee To Explain Racism To Him Again…
  it's aliiiiiiive

Wonkette Infiltrates CPAC As Sarah Palin Reads Joke About Obama’s Teleprompter From Teleprompter

Wonkette Special Correspondent Prommie Promzerelli attended the Conservative Political Action Conference on a whim this weekend – and oh what fun was had! – as our dear Prommie soon found himself VIP-credentialed and fully immersed in CPAC’s unique and heterogeneous mix of the Libertarians, Angry Old People, Batshit Insane Colonial Re-enactors, College Republicans, and Prom-Queen Wannabees who had all flooded the halls of Maryland’s Gaylord Hotel. (Huh-huh… “Gaylord!”) Read more on Wonkette Infiltrates CPAC As Sarah Palin Reads Joke About Obama’s Teleprompter From Teleprompter…
  academy awards in hell

Rick Santorum Gives Mitt Romney the Oscar For Reading Teleprompter

It’s America’s big night for urban elitists who have seen whatever otherwise unknown movies are nominated for Academy Awards tonight — consider it the Super Bowl for people who only drink box wine ironically, or the big NASCAR race/crash for people who still have most of their own teeth. Oscar (TM) Night is here! If, like us, you don’t really care but still “have people coming over” to “get high” and “eat some bogus recipe made of things we heard about in the New York Times Sunday Styles section, then by all means let’s change the subject to real (terrible) acting. We are talking about Mitt Romney, of course, and Rick Santorum’s blistering new charge that Mittens is reading off a teleprompter when he woodenly reads his prepared remarks that were written months ago by some high-priced communications expert who should really be fired. You know who else reads off a teleprompter? Read more on Rick Santorum Gives Mitt Romney the Oscar For Reading Teleprompter…
  we all need a vacation from this crap

Hilarious Congressman Trying To Take Away Obama Teleprompter Funding

More than 400 amendments were filed Monday night. Among them were a proposal from Rep. Steve Womack, R-Ark., to eliminate funding for the president’s Teleprompter And then the founding fathers and the people who died for this country over the centuries all rose up from their graves to come shake Womack’s hand, because he reached the pinnacle of American democracy, the embodiment of their most cherished dreams of what the United States could become. [Fox Nation] Read more on Hilarious Congressman Trying To Take Away Obama Teleprompter Funding…
  he ruined congress

Let the Great Crapping-On of Obama Begin

Voters across the nation are going to the polls today to vote “Yes” or “No-Good Elitist Bastard” on Barack Obama, our nation’s president and only member of our government, and most people think most people in most places will choose that latter option. And since this is vote is not actually a complex array of hundreds of individual elections, and nothing a “Congress” has done the past two years will affect it in any way, we can totally say this is a direct referendum on the president. And that guy sucks, doesn’t he? Read more on Let the Great Crapping-On of Obama Begin…
  cartoon violence

Oily, Sticky Cartoon Sex

By the Comics CurmudgeonHas the long, oily nightmare of oil spewing out of the Earth’s crust in the Gulf of Mexico finally ended? Maybe! BP seems to think so, and they sure haven’t been wrong on this point yet. But even if the actual petroleum-puking is at an end, we need to assess and clean up the long-term damage all this crude has done. There’s the all the birds who are covered with oil and everything and blah blah blah — but, more important, what has the oil spill done to America’s sexytime sex activities? Terrible things, it turns out. Read more on Oily, Sticky Cartoon Sex…
  censorship

RNC Pulls Comical Web Ad About ACORN And Bill Ayers And TeLePrOMpTerz

Call it the Road to Recovery, you queer fink motherfuckers: a web ad from the RNC, to commemorate Obama’s 100 days of Famine, posted yesterday and immediately pulled for being terrible. Watch what appears to be a Southern white man doing his “blacky voice” over video of Obama’s inauguration speech. Read more on RNC Pulls Comical Web Ad About ACORN And Bill Ayers And TeLePrOMpTerz…
  memes that are still alive

AP Wingnut Also Concerned About Teleprompter Usage

The Washington press corps has come full circle, everyone! Famous Karl Rove-loving wingnut Ron Fournier, who is somehow the Washington Bureau Chief for the AP, has written crucial News Analysis of the Obama press conference last night. We know it’s “analysis,” you see, because that word is in the headline: “Analysis: Teleprompter telegraphs Obama caution.” Read more on AP Wingnut Also Concerned About Teleprompter Usage…
  latest swedish model news

RedState Warns: Obama To Seize Internet

A smart person at the RedState blog has discovered an article on the secret website “CNET” about how Barack Obama plans to capture the Internet and run it, more or less. “Total control is their only goal,” warns the intrepid Kenny Solomon. “The uber-geek-lib-techies under the spell of President TelePrompTer will do anything asked of them, legal or not and probably are already anyway. This will just make it all nice and legal-like.” Obama knows nothing about the “law” anyway, unless it comes from his teleprompter, haw haw haw. (Fortunately Mr. Solomon also provides two bits of comic relief to soften this terrifying piece of news. “Snarky note number one” is the funniest fucking thing ever.) [RedState] Read more on RedState Warns: Obama To Seize Internet…