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Tag: teleprompter

Actual wall will be built even more bigly

Donald Trump’s Big Immigration Speech Probably Sounded A Lot Better In The Original German

Donald Trump's immigration speech in Phoenix definitely attracted people who already planned to vote for Donald Trump.
All the lies, none of the energy.

Donald Trump Gives Low-Energy Teleprompter Speech And Nobody Cares. Sad!

Donald Trump gave a speech about Hillary Clinton, and thanks to the miracle of Twitter, it was fact-checked to pieces while in progress.
It's like he's a genius, only the opposite of that.

Donald Trump Will Lead ‘Smart Movement’. That’s It. That’s The Joke.

Now that Donald Trump has proven his ability to read a speech from a teleprompter, thus making him the master of all foreign policy, he figures it's time to give his socio-political movement a name. A name that will...
Gaul is supposed to be a big deal, but it's very disappointing. Terrible golf. Sad!

Donald Trump Gives Serious Foreign Policy Speech Like A Big Boy

Now that Donald Trump has declared himself the Republican Nominee, High Pooh-Bah, and All-Father of the World (Dilute! Dilute!), it's time for him to start Acting Presidential, so he gave a Very Serious Foreign Policy Address today. How serious...
Obama needs to watch more Fox News, obviously

Dumb Obama Needs Mike Huckabee To Explain Racism To Him Again

Last week, President Obama committed the impeachable high crime of saying some historically accurate things at the National Prayer Breakfast about how Christians have also done some terrorism and violence and bad things in the name of spreading their...

Wonkette Infiltrates CPAC As Sarah Palin Reads Joke About Obama’s Teleprompter From Teleprompter

Wonkette Special Correspondent Prommie Promzerelli attended the Conservative Political Action Conference on a whim this weekend – and oh what fun was had! – as our dear Prommie soon found himself VIP-credentialed and fully immersed in CPAC’s unique and...

Rick Santorum Gives Mitt Romney the Oscar For Reading Teleprompter

It's America's big night for urban elitists who have seen whatever otherwise unknown movies are nominated for Academy Awards tonight -- consider it the Super Bowl for people who only drink box wine ironically, or the big NASCAR race/crash...

Hilarious Congressman Trying To Take Away Obama Teleprompter Funding

More than 400 amendments were filed Monday night. Among them were a proposal from Rep. Steve Womack, R-Ark., to eliminate funding for the president's Teleprompter And then the founding fathers and the people who died for this country over the...

Let the Great Crapping-On of Obama Begin

Voters across the nation are going to the polls today to vote "Yes" or "No-Good Elitist Bastard" on Barack Obama, our nation's president and only member of our government, and most people think most people in most places will...

Oily, Sticky Cartoon Sex

By the Comics CurmudgeonHas the long, oily nightmare of oil spewing out of the Earth's crust in the Gulf of Mexico finally ended? Maybe! BP seems to think so, and they sure haven't been wrong on this...

RNC Pulls Comical Web Ad About ACORN And Bill Ayers And TeLePrOMpTerz

Call it the Road to Recovery, you queer fink motherfuckers: a web ad from the RNC, to commemorate Obama's 100 days of Famine, posted yesterday and immediately pulled for being terrible. Watch what appears to be a Southern white...

AP Wingnut Also Concerned About Teleprompter Usage

The Washington press corps has come full circle, everyone! Famous Karl Rove-loving wingnut Ron Fournier, who is somehow the Washington Bureau Chief for the AP, has written crucial News Analysis of the Obama press conference last night. We know...

RedState Warns: Obama To Seize Internet

A smart person at the RedState blog has discovered an article on the secret website "CNET" about how Barack Obama plans to capture the Internet and run it, more or less. "Total control is their only goal," warns the...