Tag Archives: teh gay

  nothing certain except death and taxes and having to suck up to justice kennedy

Whiny Gays Finally Get Day in Court, Keep Whining Anyway

Hey gay homosexuals! Be happy! The Supreme Court is going to hear your gay cases about all the sick things you gays do, like get married and serve in the military. Wait, what? You’re NOT uniformly happy that the Supreme Court will hear your gay cases because there’s some complex different issues blah blah blah? WHAT DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM US? Read more on Whiny Gays Finally Get Day in Court, Keep Whining Anyway…
  how come the devil gets all the good companies

Anti-Gay Groups Declare Victory In War On Starbucks

If you’re anything like us, and we know you are (yeah, we tried to make that sound better too, but there’s no help for it thanks to the royal “we”), you’ve been wondering how you can best hoard your hard-earned dollars to ensure that companies are punished for liking, or even just tolerating, teh ghey. You have to hate General Mills and give up delicious Cheerios and instead eat those weird Cheerio knockoffs that come in a bag. You can’t use the Google and instead have to use Bing just like the olds do. You have to stop using T-Mobile…OK, that’s actually not so bad. Make sure to reserve your super-duper-wuper-extra hate for JC Penney, though, as they hired AN ACTUAL LESBIAN to do some things: Read more on Anti-Gay Groups Declare Victory In War On Starbucks…
  bow-chicka-wow-wow

New York Public Advocate Stone Cold Changing All The Lesbians, One Wife At A Time

Today we learned that in NYC, there is something called a “Public Advocate.” This is not a description of a thing, but an actual job, like “truck driver” or “pole dancer.” The public advocate is kind of awesome and we wish we had one: Read more on New York Public Advocate Stone Cold Changing All The Lesbians, One Wife At A Time…
  bachmann/despair 2012

Michele Bachmann’s Marriage Vow Will Destroy Porn & Sharia Forever

Put away your filthy magazines and Glee soundtrack! Because “culture war news” never gets old, America’s future Screaming Banshee-in Chief signed another one of those dumb pledge things, this one called “The Marriage Vow,” where she promises never to sex her husband and hate Islam and farm babies, and uh, what’s that old favorite? Oh yeah, she’ll ban porn, because the meth lab fun house that is her brain is having a seizure about the naked movies again. Wasn’t this one of those 2010 things that Christine O’Donnell invented, about how she wanted to kill all the porn? Maybe you were lucky enough to have almost forgotten her, and now you have buried your face into your hands and begun to wail, because we have reminded you of her existence. Read more on Michele Bachmann’s Marriage Vow Will Destroy Porn & Sharia Forever…
 

Gut Feelings

* It’s only going to take a million months but maybe by sometime next year there might be some people coming home from Iraq or something. [Capitol Hill Blue] * On account of being a hypocrite selective about who he asks to resign for what reason, Mitch McConnell won’t make Larry Craig quit if he gets cleared of having teh gay. [Election Central] * Rudy is the most respected candidate on a list where everyone has like almost the exact same score. [Political Wire] * Bush believed there were weapons and stuff in Iraq all the way until April ’06 because the guy is sort of dumb. [Think Progress] * Democrats hate your children and they want your children to be stupid, as demonstrated by some statistics. [Redstate] * Fred Thompson likes to woo operatives away from other jobs and then fire them, which, so far, is the thing we like most about him. [Radar Online] Read more on Gut Feelings…