Tag: ted cruz

Smegma-Faced Jason Chaffetz Literally Addicted To Hillary Clinton’s Emails, Please Send Help

Now he wants criminal charges against the IT guy who set up Hillary's server, because why not?

Which GOP Senator Said Trump Should Do Therapy Instead Of Press Conferences? Let’s Speculate Wildly!

SPOILER: It was Lindsey Graham, unless it wasn't.

Trump & Russia? NOBODY COULD HAVE SEEN THAT COMING!! Wonkagenda For Wed., Feb. 15, 2017

Trump raises a Russian red flag for the FBI, Andy Puzder is vengeful jerk, John McCain and Ted Cruz prepare to fight! Your morning news brief!

Sean Spicer Throws A Tantrum! Wonkagenda For Mon., Jan. 23, 2017

Trump spox offer an alt-truth, Ted Cruz and John McCain bend over, and your editrix looked purty on the teevee! Your morning news brief!

Hollywood Pees On Donald Trump’s Golden Rug. Wonkagenda for Monday, January 9, 2016

Senators are gearing up for confirm-a-palooza, K street is being flooded by Trumpkins, and Meryl Streep leaves Trump with butthurt. Your morning news brief!
Yep, she's worried. Look at the fear in her eyes.

GOP Senators Totally Cool With Benghazi-Style Attacks Now, We Guess

It's cool if our embassies get attacked, as long as Hillary's not around.

Congratulations, Mitch McConnell, You’re Wonkette’s Legislative Sh*tmuffin For 2016!

The award nobody wants goes to a man nobody likes.

Butthurt Americans Made Many Butthurt Election Complaints To FCC This Year!

For real, Americans' FCC complaints this year were PRETTY DUMB.

Uh Oh, Looks Like Tom Arnold Is Ready To Screw Donald Trump Sideways!

Tom Arnold spent Christmas tweeting about what he knows about Donald Trump, and BOY HOWDY.

Your Weekly Top Ten Says Happy War On Christmas Eve!

YOU COME READ YOUR TOP TEN CHRISTMAS WEEK STORIES RIGHT NOW!

Who Sucks Harder, Kellyanne Conway Or Ted Cruz? HAHA TRICK QUESTION, YOU LOSE!

In a competition over who can be the most hypocritical dick, Conway and Cruz WIN TOGETHER.

Ted Cruz Likes It When Cheese Dip Slimes Down His Nipples

TRIGGER WARNING, TED CRUZ IS BEING GROSS.

Trump Already An Old Man Yelling At His TV! Wonkagenda for Thursday, December 8, 2016

Donald Trump cancels inauguration golden shower and Ted Cruz goes limp for queso. Your morning news brief!

This Election Tried To Kill Us, But We Are Not Dead We Don’t Think

We are still standing, and Hillary is standing, and now it's time to WIN A DAMN ELECTION.

Ted Cruz Finally Sells Out. Your Wonkagenda: November 4, 2016

Trump scares U.S. intel, Obama fixed the economy, and the Old Grey Lady will do anything for money. Your Morning News Brief!