Tag: teabaggers

House Wingnuts Will Let Paul Ryan Be Speaker, But Only If He Wears ‘Kick Me’ Sign

Previously, on "As The House GOP Burns": Wonky Wisconsin Wunderkind Rep. Paul Ryan (R-Stairway To Heaven) had reluctantly agreed to swoop in and save the damsels in distress. The damsels in distress being, of course, the Republicans who have eated...
lying liar who lies

Paul Ryan Agrees To Be Next GOP Speaker To Resign In Disgrace

T'was mere weeks ago that we said Wisconsin Rep. Paul Ryan was not quite idiot enough to agree to be the next speaker of the House. Well, fool us twice and can't get fooled again. After weeks of pathetic...

Arizona Tea Party Hero Rep. Thinks All This Congressional Chaos Is A Blast!

With the Republican Party in COMPLETE DISARRAY, it's nice to know that at least one guy is having himself a ball! Arizona Rep. David Schweikert sponsored that whackadoodle Secret Science Reform Act of 2014, to allow tinfoil hat-wearing internet trolls their constitutional...

Ted Cruz Has No Friends And Everybody Hates Him, LOL

Awwww, are all the other Republicans being mean to Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Canada) again and pulling his pigtails and telling him he cannot eat his PB&J at their table in the cafeteria, because what a loser, YOU SUCK, TED? Why...
Team Shirley 4-Evar

Dead Breitbart’s Ghost Forced To Pay Up For Murdering Shirley Sherrod’s Career

Remember about a million years ago in 2010 when Barack Obama was still just getting started on his project of turning all Americans against each other by being a huge racist who forced teabaggers to bring racist signs to...
Oh, no, Ms. Gamrat, you couldn't quietly fade away. You had to keep us searching for more pulp novel covers, didn't you?

Horny Teabagger Lady Pretty Sure Michigan Legislature Only Kicked Her Out By Mistake

For your "gluttons for punishment" files, we present the latest dispatch concerning former Michigan state Rep. Cindy Gamrat, who was expelled from the state House less than a week ago and has now filed to run in the special...
Something something tongue-punch your fartbox

Horny Family Values Teabaggers Tossed From Michigan Legislature, Oh How Sad

Our long national nightmare/jokefest is at last over. Michigan state Reps. Todd Courser and Cindy Gamrat have lost their jobs. Courser resigned, and Gamrat was expelled by her peers in the state House. The two family-values conservatives, both of whom were...
No, I believe *I* have the floor!

Sex-Crazed Michigan Reps Beg For Light Spanking, Ooh Yeah, Just Like That

The sleazy, exceedingly stupid scandal involving Michigan state Reps. Todd Courser and Cindy Gamrat, the family-values right-wingers who concocted a fake gay scandal to cover up their real hetero affair, is grinding toward its embarrassing shame-soaked close, with both...
We don't really think Rep. Gamrat is a 1940s Messican lady

Teabagger Fornicator Writes Million Words About Jesus, No Words About Resigning

Hey, guys, just in case you spent your whole weekend worrying whether Michigan state Rep. Todd Courser -- the teabagger who had an affair with fellow teabagging legislator Cindy Gamrat and then plotted to cover it up with a fake smear...
Classic pulp covers just don't account for women as equal participants in legislative diddling

Christian Teabagger Lady Rep. Only Banged Her Crazy Colleague, Never Broke Any Laws

Michigan state Rep. Cindy Gamrat, who did adulterous sex things with certifiable loon and fellow state House member Todd Courser, made her first public statement on the scandal Friday, apologizing for her conduct but insisting that she didn't break...
Those blackmailers have some pretty hot stuff!

Michigan Teabagging Fornicator Still Making Up Super Amazing Sh*t

The incredibly stupid saga of Michigan state Rep. Todd Courser continues to unfold, with former allies in the Tea Party urging him to resign, and Courser stating even more adamantly that he's not going to knuckle under to the...

Michigan Teabagger Fornicator Also Accused Himself Of Child Molestation, For Jesus

As you might have expected, the twisted stupid saga of Todd Courser, the Michigan state representative who faked a gay-hooker scandal to cover up his genuine heterosex affair with another legislator, state Rep. Cindy Gamrat, and then claimed that he...
We are through the rabbit's looking glass, people!

Nice Christian Fornicator ‘Blackmailed’ Into Spreading Fake Gay Sex Scandal

You HAD to know, given that the two state legislators in this stupid Michigan sex scandal are rightwing teabagger Christians, that things would get even weirder and dumber. Friday, we told you how state Rep. Todd Courser came up...
Not so secret anymore

Christian Teabagger Reps Have Terrific Plan To Hide Real Affair, With Pretend Gay Hooker Scandal

It's a well-known fact that Republican sex scandals are the very best kind. For normal people who want to engage in consensual no-no sex, that's their own private no-no sex bidness, to work out with the marriage counselors and...
Obama's magazine cover JUST KIDDING LOL

Wingnuts: Sure, Josh Duggar Molested Kids, But Barack Obama Molested America Way Worse

Pollsters are hilarious sometimes. Talking Points Memo has the results of a new poll from Public Policy Polling, asking people which do they like better:  The Duggar family, kid-touching and all, or Barack Obama? You will be so shocked...
How can she lose when she's so patriotic?

Wingnut Rep. Cussin’ Folks Out For Mocking Her Bill To Kick Feds Out Of Nevada

    Well, heck, liberty-lovers, guess it's time to pour one out for Freedom in America, as the last best hope for state sovereignty went down to a big defeat in the Nevada legislature, despite the efforts of our new favorite...