• May 27, 2012

tea party

Over the weekend in Wheeling, Illinois, to a raucous crowd of eight to nine undecided voters, Representative Joe Walsh, avid Tea Partier, said a very cordial thing about the President: he’s only in the position that he’s in so that we, America, could finally say that we aren’t racist (“One of my presidents is black”). [...]

Cuddly southern man, Fox News employee and likely Tea Party embed Todd Starnes recently decided to move to — of all places — Park Slope, Brooklyn! His employer has this amusing online feature called “City Rant!,” in which members of the public are supposed to write in or videotape themselves ranting about New York, which [...]

Were you guys aware that deadbeat Tea Party Congressman Joe Walsh, running against Iraq veteran, former Blackhawk helicopter pilot, double-amputee, and assistant secretary for Veterans Affairs Tammy Duckworth, is the real fighter? You are now! “In many ways, I’m the challenger. I’m the guy who sleeps in my office, I’m the guy who goes at [...]

The Tea Party freshman who wormed his way into all our hearts when he held up some lame sign reading “Drilling = Jobs” at Obama’s fancy Jobs speech* like some sort of fainting Claymaniac at an American Idol “concert,” has been spotted taking in a doubtlessly cuss- and reefer-filled show by “urban” “entertainers” Snoop Dogg [...]

Do you remember the surreal “Susan B. Anthony and Frederick Douglass Prenatal Nondiscrimination Act of 2011,” the bill written in high-pitched banshee shrieks and designed to stem a fictional tide of sex- and race-based abortions? Remember how no one in real life — NO ONE — could figure out how the hell, exactly, this law [...]

We were skimming the FoxNews.com website looking for some of those “free Medicare scooter” ads, but got distracted by the important news of terrible writer/awful person Ayn Rand’s 107th birthday. She doesn’t look a day over 106 … objectively. Objectively-ist. Anyway, we hope she’s enjoying being tortured for Eternity in Hell, for not believing in [...]

Herman Cain had the honor of delivering the Tea Party’s official rebuttal to Obama’s State of the Union address, and praise Jesus, the thing is only 13 minutes long. Oddly, it does not mention 9-9-9. It also was only streamed on the Tea Party Express website, owing to the fact that part of the Tea [...]

Used condom George “Macaca” Allen has given humanity so many reasons to find him revolting that he is of course currently leading the pack of Republican primary candidates for the Virginia Senate race. But just to be extra sure to maintain his overall lead in tireless lifelong buffoonery, the Richmond Times-Dispatch reports that he has [...]

A group of Tennessee conservatives say they were easily bilked out of $19 million because some guy said, “Hey give me all your money and I will make a Tea Party TeeVee Network, all about your favorite subject: yourselves.” And then the guy allegedly took the money and ran, and now the Tennessee teabaggers are [...]

Joe Walsh has a new Fox News pundit audition tape out! See, Joe has been carefully studying Roger Ailes’ stable of shrieky little porcupines over there during his constant talking head appearances on the channel. So here he is trying out a “full Bill O’Reilly” during a constituent meet-up, by screaming his bloody head off [...]

Here’s a pre-tangled mess of shitty intestines to unravel: Michael Bloomberg’s pollster arranged a survey of the Occupy Wall Street campers and published his paranoid/fearmongering results in the Wall Street Journal. The pollster/WSJ columnist, Douglas Schoen, then objectively described the #OWS protesters as “dangerously out of touch with the broad mass of the American people” [...]

As infamous walking cue-ball “Joe the Plumber” proved in 2008, America is top-loaded with dubiously employed gasbag wingnuts who believe they are the economic equals of the Koch Brothers. Each near-bankrupt sole proprietor of a drywall-hanging home-based business that hasn’t had any work since 2007 is now threatening to “stop job creation” because of the [...]

Human feces clump media whore Congressman Joe Walsh lurvs the attentionz! Except when it is about how he is a terrible loser with regard to the actual people who depend on him, his children. Therefore, we will provide this Important Update on the ONGOING SAGA of “why is Joe Walsh such a deadbeat dad?” because [...]

Like everyone else in the nation, we have grown used to the stream of wingnut “gubmint gon’ steal ur gunz” Second Amendment action-alert emails always emanating en masse from the AOL accounts of America’s loony cousins and neighbors, OR, apparently now, from a U.S. Senator! Mother Jones spotted pantsless prick Rand Paul sticking his name on [...]