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Posts Tagged ‘switzerland’

Meet the Anti-Condi!

Monday, March 3rd, 2008

OMG!!Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomatâ„¢!

Friends, last week was totally boring in Condiland, so we’re going to ignore it! Instead, we’re going to ponder the opposite of Condi. Yes, just as there is an Antichrist (no, not Dick Cheney, Kathy Lee Gifford!) and an Anti-Elvis (Michael J. Fox), so too is there an Anti-Condi. Who is it? Join me after the jump and find out!

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Condoleezza Dream Team: McCain and Rice ‘08!

Monday, January 28th, 2008

OMG!!Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomatâ„¢!

Condi’s been a gal-on-the-go, a veritable Mary Tyler Moore of the diplotaunte circuit. She traipsed from Switzerland to Germany and then all the way to Colombia and back again. More importantly, using advanced Wonkette Shoe Identification Technology, we can reveal the shocking news that Madame Secretary has shifted her footwear allegiance from Ferragamo to Manolo. All this, Oliver North, and Robert Novak’s wistful dreams of a Condi vice presidency … after the jump!

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The Foreigns Have A ‘Magic Formula’ For You

Wednesday, December 19th, 2007

Come make sweet love to my beret mon cherieHello everyone, and welcome to this week’s edition of The Foreigns: They’re Just Like Us! Our goal as always is to prove that we Americans and those foreign Foreigns have nothing to fear from one another, and that under our variously colored skins, we’re really more alike than different. For instance, did you know that, like you, the Foreigns can’t get enough of the infectious 2002 smash hit single “In da club?” Also like you, they have ludicrously misguided ideas about AIDS, are racists, and are high as fucking kites. Join us for a guided tour of depravity, after the jump! MORE »


World War III!

Friday, March 2nd, 2007

swiss.jpgYou can all go home, kids. Nothing else today could possibly be funnier than this headline. MORE »


The State Department: More Gossipy Than a High School Cafeteria

Monday, March 6th, 2006

While Condoleezza Rice is busy doing bicep curls, her State Department underlings are doing heavy lifting in the gossip department. For some reason, lately we’ve received a fair amount of State-related scuttlebutt. Here are some highlights.

cameron hume.gifA tipster tells us: “The U.S embassy in Sudan held a private dinner at their residence. [U.S. Charge d'Affaires] Cameron Hume was dropping the usual comments about the Sudanese goverment. A couple of Sudanese businessmen — incidentally, they don’t support the GOS whatsoever — felt he was being over the top. One told the ambassador that his comments were inflammatory and did nothing to foster better relations between the two countries. This is where it gets good. Apparently the man has a temper. So he said that they were like the businessmen in Nazi Germany and they indirectly supported the regime. They told him that his tone wasn’t acceptable. This is where it gets better. He told them to ‘Run tell your goverment and your Prophet too.’”

OH NO HE DIN’T!!! And did he draw a cartoon of the Prophet too? (If you think we’re making this up, the broad outlines of the story are confirmed by this news account.)

Additional gossip — concerning Deputy Secretary of State Robert Zoellick and the infamous Pamela Willeford, Ambassador to Switzerland and Dick Cheney hunting partner — appears after the jump.

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