Nearly a third of Americans don’t know Dick Cheney is vice president, according to a sad new survey by the Pew Research Center. While people can certainly be forgiven for “forgetting” Cheney is actually running the USA, other poll questions revealed that Americans are just getting dumber overall.

For example, 74% could name the governor of their own state in 1989; only 64% hold such precious knowledge today.

After the jump, feel good about yourself for reading Wonkette!

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Hey, do you like surveys? Sure, we all do! So take ours, jerk-off! And hey — if you submit an email address (totes optional), you’ll be entered in a contest to win an iPod shuffle (you choose the color)!!!! (Our usual contest rules are here) MORE »

• Delayed discovery of three detainee suicides at Guantanamo Bay raises questions concerning whether regulations for supervision of prisoners were followed. Army general compares the suicides to the 9/11 attacks. [NYT; WP]

• Race between House immigration hawk J.D. Hayworth (R-AZ) and Democratic challenger Harry Mitchell is shaping up as a referendum on immigration policy. [WP]
• Immigration issue also complicates Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger’s re-election bid in California. [WSJ]
• Iran offers initial reaction to Western nuclear proposal; deems some parts acceptable, but offers no specifics. [WP]
• Democrats’ chances of scoring wins in governors’ races may be slipping. [USAT]
• Prominent Democrats schmooze with bloggers at Yearly Kos, reflecting growing clout of netroots. [Time; LAT]

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Most Americans are pretty ignorant about world affairs: MORE »

We love all the weird scientific-studies-with-political-implications that are Richard Morin’s stock-in-trade (see links collected below). In today’s Post, citing a study conducted by researchers at the University of Texas at Austin, he informs us: MORE »

Pity the poor Daily Candy! Washington DC can’t quite figure out what to do with it, and they can’t quite figure out Washington DC — as evidenced in today’s perky missive, which directs subscribers to a survey (please please please say you buy 10+ beauty products monthy, they whisper). Alas, even in their attempt to learn the very old fashioned way just who the hell their audience is, they show that, perhaps, it may be a lost cause:

C’mon, ladies. We don’t go to your house and mispronounce “Houston Street,” do we? MORE »

Churning out scientific studies connecting personality traits with political views — e.g., conservatives are happier, or secretly racist, or just plain scary — has turned into a veritable cottage industry. And the studies just keep on coming. MORE »

So the Post did this thing where they “morphed” a couple representatives’ faces with those of (MAVERICK RENEGADE LONE WOLF ETC. ETC.) John McCain and Hillary Clinton. We’re not sure why, but they seem to think it’s important. The end result: a touch of Hillary makes any anonymous pol more likable. John, though, just makes you look untrustworthy and puffy. We do think Senator McCain is perfectly likable — doesn’t everyone have an uncle who looks like him? But that doesn’t translate to electability. We would never want that particular uncle in any position of responsibility. Still, though, it’s hard not to think their methodology a little suspect. Who would you rather vote for: cute li’l Mary Bono (R-CA), or the “Paula Vaughn” the amalgam?
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The President’s approval rating has fallen to an all-time low of 34%. This puts him somewhere between chiropractors and bankers in terms of public respect. On the bright side, though, he’s still beating out HMO managers and insurance salesmen — a good politician always makes sure to poll more favorably than his donors, after all. MORE »

A survey of 2000 Playgirl readers provides the best news Washington men have had since the Senate recessed before taking their Viagra away:

— While 58% favored a slightly muscular build, 42% said they found love handles kind of sexy
– Chest hair is a turn-off according to 51 %, but 47% said just a little is fine with them
– Metrosexuals are definitely out, and rough around the edges rule the day (73%)
– Big bucks are unimportant; only 4% responded that money mattered in the long run

The real news here is that Playgirl found 2000 subscribers who aren’t men. Alternate headline: “Playgirl readers willing to settle.” MORE »