surveys
Let’s Make Fun Of Rep. Daniel Webster, For Being Bad At Congress
Last week we wrote about the latest program that House Republicans drew from their box of Valuable Programs That Benefit Any Number Of People And Aren’t That Expensive But Should Be Destroyed Solely Because A Democrat Likes Them, the American Community Survey — a form of several dozens questions sent to random households each month, [...]
70% of America ‘Dreading’ 2012 Presidential Campaign
Ha ha, here is a fun new study that proves everybody would basically like to trade the 2012 presidential election for, say, a massive asteroid strike: Gallup asked voters how jazzed they were for the Obama-Not Romney campaign year, and people basically started weeping and vomiting, simultaneously, into their phones. “Given a choice, 70% of [...]
62% of Americans Morally Unfit For Amoral U.S. Politics
America’s elected officials range from rat-eyed sheriff bullies who mercilessly persecute the various racial minorities to the president, who constantly murders people all over the world and shovels billions of dollars to Wall Street. And yet, a new survey proves that 62% of Americans “say their past would preclude them from running for public office.” [...]
Most Americans Hate Government, Democracy Itself
Important cable teevee station CNN has commissioned two (2) polls of the Americans, and the results are bad for the Tea Baggers’ beloved “U.S. Constitution” and “Democracy,” so it’s a good thing those people don’t actually like either of those things, when it leads to a common slave becoming the so-called “People’s President” who puts [...]
The Best Phone Survey In Massachusetts Right Now
Where do the Teabaggers in Texas who are phone-banking Massachusetts households come up with this shit? “I just got a polling call about Martha Coakley. I also had to answer questions about gay marriage, Israel, and malaria, including this one: ‘In World War II, 6 million Jews were killed by the Nazis. Now 6 million [...]
RNC Health Care Survey, WOW
Intrepid Washington Independent blog reporter Dave Weigel has earned himself another steak ‘n’ baked dinner tonight by obtaining this, the RNC’s “2009 Future of American Health Survey.” YES. THAT IS LITERALLY QUESTION FOUR. Republicans, man! C’mon! Some of us just want to have a functioning polity here, okay? [Washington Independent]
Steele’s RNC Survey Collects Helpful Data About How Democrats Are Dumb
RNC Chairman Michael Steele is VERY SERIOUS about bringing the Republican party back to its glory days of him not being allowed in it. He has sent supporters an e-mail with an objective survey of questions, knowing full well that the results will humble GOP leaders into making some tough acknowledgments. For example, the question [...]
Republicans Firmly Committed To Losing More Elections
Republicans have made the only conclusion possible about their party following the electoral repudiation of an ancient war hero who ran on the “not a Negro” platform and chose as his running mate a proud religious nutjob ignoramus with a bubble of methane where her brain should be: they have decided their party keeps losing [...]
HOW SCREWED IS MICHELE BACHMANN? DETAILS AT 11: SurveyUSA will release a tasty new poll for Minnesota’s District 6 at 11pm Eastern tonight. Prediction: Bachmann is winning by 50 points, at least. [SurveyUSA]
Is Your ‘National Mood’ As Crappy As 75% Of America’s?
Are You As Dumb As America’s Smartest College Kids?
GOP Voters Having More Sex … But Sex With What?
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