Wonkette

DC’s two “shadow” senators, Michael Brown and Paul Strauss, have given their very worthless, non-voting, figurehead endorsements to Barack Obama, the corrupt Chicago hustler currently running for president. Actually, that’s a lie — these two are each superdelegates, so they can vote at the convention and not just pretend to vote from the peanut gallery. What kind of democracy is that, when we are now letting fake senators pick the president? Why doesn’t Barack Obama denounce or reject this? [DCist]

Chelsea Clinton recently went on a much-publicized breakfast date with Jason Rae, the 21-year-old Democratic superdelegate college student, in an attempt to sway him towards Camp Hillary. Something went wrong — too much teeth, perhaps? — and he’s decided to endorse Barack Obama. According to Rae, “It is a difficult choice for anyone, but in the end, the choice for me has become clear. I am proudly supporting Senator Barack Obama.” Aww poor Chels! Practice on a banana, sweetheart, and forget Jason Rae ever existed. [CNN]

Just as Ron Paul will harness confusion at the Republican National Convention to convert supposedly “pledged” delegates to his uplifting cause, Hillary Clinton will do the same on the Democratic side. A senior Clinton adviser told Politico’s Roger Simon, the guy who looks a bit like Henry Waxman except without the insane nose, that if forced the Clinton campaign would pursue the votes of pledged delegates–those assigned based on the results of primaries and caucuses. MORE »

Democratic Senators Chuck Schumer (NY) and Dick Durbin (IL)–a Clinton and an Obama supporter, respectively–are what D.C. insiders call “roommates.” They sparred like Montagues and Capulets on Meet the Press yesterday, and in the end they admitted that Dick was the one who makes the bed back at home. At least the Republicans have the decency to conduct this sort of behavior in the privacy of their own public bathroom stalls. [Meet the Press]

John McCain was a mere 90 years old when Democratic superdelegate Jason Rae was born. The now 21-year-old rose to stardom at the age of 17, when he defeated the president of the Wisconsin state firefighter’s union and was elected to the DNC at the state party convention. Now Chelsea Clinton, her dad and every other Democrat you have ever heard of is calling him up and trying to lock down his superdelegate vote. What are they promising him? Bong rips? [ABC News]

Howard Dean never became president, but now he might be able to pick one! He said yesterday that the DNC would like to have a nominee by mid-March or April. But he will NOT have him some kind of brokered convention if that doesn’t work. Oh yes, he went there: an “arrangement” might be in order. MORE »

*THAT CHELSEA IS GOING PLACES:* Mute mercenary-child Chelsea Clinton “has been calling uncommitted superdelegates to seek their support,” according to Politico’s Ben Smith. But is it for her mom’s campaign or her own planned run in 2024? I bet she’ll have all sorts of new tax credit micro-reform ideas by then! It’s the Clinton Way(TM). [Ben Smith]