Wonkette

HILLARY WINS CALIFORNIA! She’s got 55% right now, with a grand 15% of precincts reporting. Obama’s got 33%. John McCain has won, too! He beat Romney by 20%! Sorry, Obama babies: MSNBC has just projected it for Hitlery!

*PROHJECKSHINSSS:* It is at least 7:44 a.m., in the morning, right now, and we’re still typing about politics. Why, Mormon Jesus? Why??!? WONKETTE ANGRRRY. Oh yes, the point of this post: Hillary wins Missouri! That was a close one between her and Barry, because… fuck them both. [The Page]

*PROJECTIONS:* MSNBC calls Connecticut for Obama. That’s big! It was one of those states that could have gone anywhere for anyone. But now it will never go to Hillary Clinton. Cry baby! Go cry somewhere, baby!

*PROJECTIONS:* Obama — Utah; Huckabee — Albama; Various Candidates — Other states we missed

*PROJECTIONS:* Clinton — New Jersey (haha, Barack’s a loser!); Obama — Alabama (BLACK)