Tag Archives: steve doocy

  Why can't they just go somewhere else?

Stupid Fox News Idiots Confused Why Sharks Always Live In The Ocean So Much

Sharks is confusing!
Making fun of “Fox & Friends” twice in one day? SOLD! Here is your video of the dumbshit couch talking about a very scary shark attack that happened in South Africa to surfer Mick Fanning, and how it’s one thing when normal swimmers get attacked by sharks, but when big important surfers get attacked by sharks, then we have a problem, because don’t the sharks even know who they’re messing with? (They are messing with humans, who, even when they are badass surfers, are smaller and not as badass as sharks.) Read more on Stupid Fox News Idiots Confused Why Sharks Always Live In The Ocean So Much…
  all of them katie

How Many Fox News Anchors Does It Take To Give Donald Trump A Rimjob?

S-M-R-T.
The answer is A LOT. Which makes sense, because Donald Trump’s butthole isn’t weak like the other candidates’ buttholes, and it’s definitely not a captured POW loser like John McCain’s butthole. Trump had a big weekend, and he probably put the nail in his own coffin by saying mean things about McCain — some of which are KINDA true, except for how Donald Trump is an asshole who doesn’t know how to string words together without coming off like a ginormous cowering pussy, and who also doesn’t really have a place to talk about others’ Vietnam War records, since the only bravery Trump exhibited during that time was in the number of bullshit deferments he managed to get. Oh wait, that wasn’t “brave,” that was “brazen,” and also “cowardly.” Read more on How Many Fox News Anchors Does It Take To Give Donald Trump A Rimjob?…
  USA Women's Soccer Victory May Cause Next Mideast War

Fox ‘Doctor’ Keith Ablow: Men Punch Ladies Because We Let Girls Do Sports

Some chicks like it rough, he hears
As you may have heard, a Florida State sportsball nickelback, De’Andre Johnson, was dropped from the sportsball team this week after surveillance video showed him punching a woman in the face in a June incident. (Johnson’s attorney says the incident was sparked when the woman called Johnson a racial epithet). But gosh, what does Fox News “Medical A-Team” member Dr. Keith Ablow think about all this? He thinks it’s just what happens when ladies want equality, which is pretty obvious if you think about it with Keith Ablow’s strangely misshapen cerebral cortex. Read more on Fox ‘Doctor’ Keith Ablow: Men Punch Ladies Because We Let Girls Do Sports…
  NO FAIR!

Fox News Race Experts So Mad Obama Allowed To Use N-Word And They Aren’t

Steve Doocy asked his black friends, so it's okay.
In the aftermath of the Charleston shootings, many people are grasping for answers and trying to have a discussion about enduring racism in the United States and what can be done about it. Wingnuts at Fox News are currently Doing Their Part, by whining about how it’s NO FAIR that President Obama gets to say “nigger” and they don’t, because that’s not racial transcendence! Obama appeared on Marc Maron’s “WTF” podcast, and attempted to have a grown-up conversation about the state of racism today: Read more on Fox News Race Experts So Mad Obama Allowed To Use N-Word And They Aren’t…
  Enraged about all of these things

Here Are 9 Wingnut Reasons For Charleston Murders That Aren’t Spelled R-A-C-I-S-M

What's left to say?
Dylann Storm Roof killed black people because he wanted to kill black people. Roof admitted this! But maybe it’s not about race. Let’s take another trip down Wingnut River to see why Roof’s nine victims — Rev. Clementa Pinckney, Tywanza Sanders, Susie Jackson, Cynthia Hurd, Sharonda Coleman-Singleton, DePayne Middleton-Doctor, Ethel Lee Lance, Myra Thompson, and Rev. Daniel Lee Simmons, Sr. REALLY died. Read more on Here Are 9 Wingnut Reasons For Charleston Murders That Aren’t Spelled R-A-C-I-S-M…
  You were expecting something else?

Fox News Condemns Vicious Hate Crime In Charleston — Against Christians

You think you're Doing Unto Others? Really, bitch?
This is something you don’t see every day. Or ever. But the dimwits at “Fox & Friends” are quite upset about an alleged hate crime committed by a white man that left nine people dead in Charleston, South Carolina. (We’d call it terrorism if the suspect were dark-skinned and Muslim, but he’s not, and we all know white men don’t do terrorism.) Read more on Fox News Condemns Vicious Hate Crime In Charleston — Against Christians…
  Won't Someone Please Think Of The HOA?

Wingnuts Outraged Teen In Bikini Forced Hero Cop To Smack Her Around Some

She probably doesn't like crosseyed pegasi in the pool either.
The National Conversation On The Pool Party Gone Awry in McKinney, Texas, took a familiar turn after the first full day of media exposure. Yr Wonkette was astonished to see that on Sunday, even the nine full-time staffers of Twitchy initially condemned the McKinney police officer, now identified as Cpl. Eric Casebolt, for manhandling a 15-year-old girl in a swimsuit. But by Monday night, they had rejoined their readers in worrying about how All The Blacks are blowing this out of proportion, with a scary story warning that the Nation of Islam and the New Black Panthers were joining the growing protests. And thus was order restored to the WingnuttoSphere. Read more on Wingnuts Outraged Teen In Bikini Forced Hero Cop To Smack Her Around Some…
  bless their dumbass hearts

Fox & Friends: Hillary Clinton Can’t Talk Southern, She Only Lived In Arkansas 18 Years!

One dipshit, two dipshit, three dipshit ...
Let’s Make A Stupid about Hillary Clinton, with the cast of teevee’s Fox & Friends. You see, Wednesday, Hillary Clinton spoke in South Carolina, and not only did she make a joke about how her hair won’t go white in the White House, because she’s been coloring it for years (it was actually pretty funny!), but she said it in a Southern accent, FAKER!!!! She also said that she ate chicken and waffles, which is an obvious lie because Hillary Clinton only eats at Chipotle, and she doesn’t tip. The Fox & Friends couch … well, let’s just say her accent confused them very much. Read more on Fox & Friends: Hillary Clinton Can’t Talk Southern, She Only Lived In Arkansas 18 Years!…
  Are There No Jerk Houses?

Fox News Has Thoughts On Obama’s ‘Leeches’ Speech. They Are Bad Thoughts!

Tell 'em about the talents again
Oh, there goes Barack Obama again, beating up on the crusading journalists of Fox News for having the guts to selectively depict poor people as terrible leeches. At a Georgetown University event Tuesday, Obama said media narratives have presented a skewed image of poor people, because outrage sells: Read more on Fox News Has Thoughts On Obama’s ‘Leeches’ Speech. They Are Bad Thoughts!…
  Satan probably did it

Mean GoFundMe Refuses To Raise Cash For Allegedly Murderous Baltimore Cops

Pppppplease!
Why does GoFundMe hate the wingnuts so much? It seems like every day, somebody is putting up a campaign, only to have it canceled, just because the beneficiaries of the sweet wingnut cash quote unquote “broke laws.” First you had them taking down the anti-gay Oregon cake bakers’ GoFundMe, because they were found to be in violation of Oregon civil rights laws. (The owners contend that Satan did it, of course.) Then the gay-hating flower lady, Barronelle Stutzman, had her GoFundMe taken down as well because, oops, she actually violated Washington state laws. And now, the nice Baltimore Fraternal Order Of Police (they are not nice) tried to raise some money for the cops who are charged with murdering Freddie Gray, and their campaign was gone within 41 MINUTES, because apparently raising money for accused murderers isn’t cool anymore, how is that EVEN fair? Read more on Mean GoFundMe Refuses To Raise Cash For Allegedly Murderous Baltimore Cops…
  it's a trap!

Men’s Rights Dude Tells Fox & Friends Why Marriage Is A Scam To Take His Man-Money

Won't someone please think of the men?
Tuesday’s Fox & Friends had a pretty darned exciting segment with “Men’s Rights” dweeb Peter Lloyd, who calls himself a “suffragent,” and has written a book called Stand By Your Manhood, all about why men should never get trapped into marriage, which is BAD. It wasn’t quite the orgy of feminist-bashing that Fox might have hoped for, but heaven knows they tried. Read more on Men’s Rights Dude Tells Fox & Friends Why Marriage Is A Scam To Take His Man-Money…
  Finally somebody is giving him the respect he deserves!

Rick Santorum: Nobody Gets Me Like ISIS Gets Me

Rick Santorum has finally found a media source that hasn’t been hijacked by the gay-loving liberals, one that quotes him accurately and nicely and conveys the true heart of his messages. WorldNetDaily? NO, not that commie rag. It is ISIS! Read more on Rick Santorum: Nobody Gets Me Like ISIS Gets Me…
  Maybe More Guns Would Help?

Fox News: Eric Holder Really Should NOT Have Shot Those Cops In Ferguson!

The other chyron for the story: 'Street Justice: Police officers shot in wake of DOJ Report'
While two police officers were still hospitalized after being shot in Ferguson, Missouri, early Thursday morning (they have since been released), and police have no suspects, Fox News and other rightwing sources have identified the true culprits: Attorney General Eric Holder and everyone who’s ever protested against police brutality. Read more on Fox News: Eric Holder Really Should NOT Have Shot Those Cops In Ferguson!…