So that’s why McCain’s campaign put that puke-green screen behind him during his cringe-inducing performance in New Orleans the night Obama won the nomination. Now, Creepy McCain’s “little whining troll” act can be “mashed up” into endless comical variations — Stephen Colbert has encouraged this, on the teevee. Join us for a children’s treasury of crappy YouTube variations, possibly culminating with Yoda McCain surrounded by his brothers, the Ewoks, as they sing “Th-that’s n-not ch-change we can b-believe in.” MORE »

Here is your Michelle Obama, on the Colbert Report. And, well, jesus, she is very hot. Sure, she’s also some kind of Law School Professor, and will “help people,” and all that, but this is still an entertaining clip.

Our Liz Glover dropped by the National Portrait Gallery to ask bitter voters about Stephen Colbert’s dignified triple portrait, which enjoyed a limited engagement hanging in the restroom foyer, over the water fountain. The answers may repulse you! (Thanks to Dawne Langford for the camera work.)

Mike Huckabee sent this e-mail to an Evian PR person — seriously. Is he really so poor?

Although the Demrat party hasn’t shown much love to Stephen Colbert recently, the “Doritos Candidate” will always shill for ladiesss of the lefty persuasion when it means free magazine party cocktails! Last night, for example, Stephen Colbert was tapped to introduce an honoree at Glamour’s Women of the Year Awards, and it wasn’t Inez Tenenbaum. He introduced House Speaker Nancy Pelosi with one of those funny monologue thingies he does so well. The question lingers, however: Has Colbert turned from faux-righty to faux-righty-masquerading-as-faux-mainstream-lefty? MORE »

Those South Carolina Democrats be getting vehdy vehdy tricksey! As it happens, the state executive committee that voted 13-3 last week to keep Stephen Colbert off of its state primary ballot was taking heat from supporters of Malawian candidate Barack Obama. And who said South Carolinians hated teh Negroes? MORE »

Did you think that Stephen Colbert’s exclusion from South Carolina’s Democratic primary ballot yesterday would spell the end of his bid? Well maybe it has for Colbert, but you better believe some good-for-nothing grad students or whoever are starting the “let’s make an unofficial petition site that no one gives a shit about and will not result in any change” movement (see DraftGore.com). MORE »

“The South Carolina Democratic Party voted Thursday to keep comedian Stephen Colbert’s name off the Democratic Primary ballot, according to Executive Director Joe Werner…. Colbert, who officially filed papers to get on the ballot this morning, lost a roll call vote, 13-3.” Meh. [CNN]

A source close to Stephen Colbert tells CNN that the Colbert Report host will file papers tonight or Thursday to get on the South Carolina Democratic primary ballot — but not the Republican one. Although his initial plan had been to run in both parties’ primaries, making the Republican ballot costs $35,000, while the Democratic ballot costs $2,000. (The cost must be causing massive anxiety inside the McCain camp). To hear Colbert’s commentary on this, tune into an all-new Colbert Report tonight at 11:30/10:30 ET on Comedy Central! Well, we assume. MORE »

Presidential hopeful Stephen Colbert, who has declared that Doritos chips are supporting his campaign, was recently the target of populist John Edwards’ sole campaign tactic: That everyone except John Edwards takes donations from evil corporations. In response to South Carolina’s “Favorite Son” campaigning in Columbia Sunday, Edwards spokeswoman Teresa Wells tried to make a meta-funny:

“As the candidate of Doritos, [Colbert's] hands are stained by corporate corruption and nacho cheese. John Edwards has never taken a dime from taco chip lobbyists and America deserves a President who isn’t in the pocket of the snack food special interests.”

Don’t speak too soon, Wells. The manic investigative team at Radar is calling your bullshit. MORE »

The latest Rasmussen Reports surveyed how presidential candidate Stephen Colbert (D/R/I-SC) stacks up against other top candidates in menage-a-trois electoral scenarios. His South Carolina run has been the subject of much press speculation, and poor children still do not have health coverage. MORE »