Hi! Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by signing up for an Ad-Fewer Subscription, throwing us a couple bucks a month, or disabling your ad blocker.

Tag: sports

Trump Jr.: Ladies Shouldn’t Even BE In Business If They Don’t Like Sexual Harassment

Maybe they could go teach kindergarten if they don't want Donald Trump, Jr. to show them pictures of boobies?
Easy on the eyes, just saying.

Sexxxy Green Bay Packers Quarterback Tells Refugee Haters To Eat Astroturf

The past few days have been sad and disheartening. We began the weekend mourning with our friends in Paris in the aftermath of terrorist attacks meant to, well, terrorize. And then many of our own American citizens, including Republican...
So what you do is you dribble the ball, and then throw it in the basket. Got it? Dribble, then basket.

Sports Lady Will Tell Large Men How To Use Their Balls

We have a Lady Nice Time for you, and it is about sports! No, not those Women's World Cup ladies, we already wrote about that! This is about how the San Antonio Spurs, a basketball team made up largely of...
Come at me, bro.

Dudes Kiss On The Mouth On LA Dodgers Kiss Cam, And Nobody Even Gay-Bashes Them!

Awww, progress! If you have ever gone to see one of the various types of sportsball matches, you have undoubtedly seen a "kiss-cam." It's that thing where the camera is all of a sudden on you and your neighbor,...
Sad Brazil fan is sad.

Sportsball Year In Review: It Was Mostly Awful!

Sports! Oh man, sports, aren't they great? Shut up, they are too. Here now is your 2014 Wonkette Sportsball Year In Review, because why not? Off-field Hits Plague NFL Sorry to break this to you, Wonketeers, but the NFL remains the...

Ben Shapiro Just Doesn’t Get Why These Gays Have To Ruin Sports With Politics

Whey-faced anger bear Ben Shapiro has never met an issue he could not connect to the scourge of leftism and political correctness that is ruining America for whiny, snot-nosed, privileged jerks like Ben Shapiro. Today's example: This highly unintelligent...

Jay Carney Insists That The President Wasn’t Being Playfully Booed

We all know that Boston sports fans are a bunch of half-literate swamp turds who make all sorts of furious, guttural moaning sounds whenever you mention the athletic teams they're supposed to like. So were those boos last night...

Zany Washington Post Marijuana Story Contains Dangerous Levels Of Wordplay

Oh, Washington Post writer Emily Heil, we were going to make excuses for you, assuming you were some poor underpaid intern forced to churn out blog postlets for the Post's "In The Loop" blog, which is different from all...

Rick Santorum’s New Pitch To Voters: I Am Good At Some Sports

Rick Santorum has chosen a new strategy in his quest to win the Republican presidential nomination that he cannot mathematically win: Talkin' sports. You know, shootin' the shit with his buddies, the voters, about golf, baseball, bowling. Shooting guns....

Rick Perry Still in This Thing, Because Governing Texas Is So Last Summer

The night after finishing fifth place in Iowa, ahead of now-quitter Michele Bachmann, Rick Perry, one of the most subdued dudes (subdudes!) ever, was up running around a lake in serious winter running gear, his hair as unkempt and...

Michelle Obama Plays Fancy Tennis Sport For Obese Children

Our FLOTUS has decided to get back to "business," which means she is once again shoving things like fitness and exercise down the throats of America's children, in between all the nachos and gravy that are already down there....

CNN: Gays To Be Tested On Sports Trivia Knowledge

You know when you buy some something, let's say a "suit for work interviews," and then everybody is wearing the same thing, including at the very building where you're interviewing? Or, you know how you move to the Big...

Obama Calls Philadelphia Eagles To Congratulate Them On Dog-Fighter

Peter King of NBC reported during Football Night in America that President Barack Obama recently called Eagles owner Jeffrey Lurie to congratulate the team for giving quarterback Mike Vick a second chance. President Obama explained that a level playing field...

Baltimore Orioles Distance Selves From Birther Outfielder

Baltimore Orioles outfielder Luke Scott went into Major League Baseball's offseason winter meetings with a .902 OPS on the year and, it turns out, a deep distrust of that Kenyan socialist Barack Obama. "He was not born here," said...

Evil Soccer Organization Chooses Evil Russia and Qatar Over America

The United States' big dreams of hosting the 2022 World Cup were shattered by one of the planet's smallest nations. In a historic vote Thursday in Zurich, FIFA awarded the hosting rights to Qatar, a Middle Eastern country smaller than...

New Axiom: As Nancy Pelosi Votes, So Votes John Boehner

You know how Democrats are attacked in ads for "rubber-stamping" Pelosi and/or Obama? Boehner has voted with the Democratic leadership 52 percent of the time in 2010. So has Rep. Mike Pence (Ind.), chairman of the Republican conference and former...