Have you heard about the iPhone? It’s a wonderful new invention that lets the NSA illegally record all your phone calls, copy all your contacts, keep records of all your Web and IM activity, watch you through the camera, listen in on your household through the mic, and probably put you in a terrorist no-fly database for listening to Cynthia McKinney singing that stupid Pink song.

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We were hoping somebody would ask this question at Rumsfeld’s press conference today, but no such luck, as usual. (Wonkette doesn’t even have the Pentagon clearance for Craigslist booty calls.)

Here’s what little we know: Late Friday, a crazy six-alarm fire gutted the three-story Building 54, where the 902nd Military Intelligence Group did its special work. That work included infiltrating a group of Quaker pacifists, running allegedly-banned Total Information Awareness and TALON surveillance monstrosities that DARPA was forced to hide somewhere else, and conducting “counterintelligence activities in support of Army commanders and to protect Army forces, secrets and technologies by detecting, identifying, neutralizing and exploiting foreign intelligence services and international terrorist threats.”

We’ll see if this has anything to do with that Pentagon vs. CIA vs. NSA secret war we keep hearing about, after the jump. ECNATSNEPPAH SI ECNO …

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