ANNOUNCEMENT OF INTENT TO LIVEBLOG: Join us at 8:30 p.m. Eastern Time as we begin a long evening of liveblogging Barack Obama’s special money speech to Congress, and Little Bobby Jindal’s special response (Jindal is a minority, too!), and all the usual jabbering dildos on the cable news. REMEMBER TO STOP AT THE LIQUOR STORE AND SPEND ALL YOU HAVE, ON THE LIQUOR. [Tonight's Drinking Game]

KEN LAYNE REMEMBERS OBAMA’S NOMINATION SPEECH: “For two long, ridiculous years, I had covered this campaign — if by ‘covered’ you mean ‘wrote stupid jokes about these terrible people, every day, for a Web site.’ Now was not the time to give up and watch history on a cheap wall monitor over a concession booth.” [New York Times Sunday Magazine]

Walnuts is re-launching his campaign for the millionth time, hurrah! Today he unveils a new speech, full of humor and zest and “my friends” and transparent falsehoods like, “we’ve got them just where we want them,” because yes, six months ago if you had asked John McCain where he wanted to be 21 days from the election, he would have said, “Down 10 points nationally and fighting to keep Virginia and North Carolina in the red column.” MORE »

We have seen this service before, this thingy that counts how many times a person said this word or that word, and it is interesting how John McCain says “love” more than Barack Obama, and Obama says “war” more than McCain. But the real story, as tipster Whitney notes, is that neither of them have ever let the words “truck nutz” escape their lips. They are running for president of America, you know! [Speech Wars]

Here it is, if you missed some, or all of it, or maybe the Secret Service took your laptop when you were getting a lemonade. Not quite as crazy as watching it with 80,000+ cheering Obama nuts in an outdoor football stadium at nightfall, but it is pretty great and filled with good lines. [YouTube]

McCain is giving a speech! Let’s talk about it. He is going to give us a thousand-year war in Iraq. He is a lunatic. “We had just one strategy, to you what I believe.” The funny thing is he believes absolutely nothing. Nothing! A mailbox believes more things. MORE »

Hey, it’s Barry! And now he’s a bigshot winner. Let’s see what he says.

“They said, they said, they said ….” This is going to be a “They said” speech. MORE »

In the great tradition of ginning up Americans with ‘American Dream’ speeches, Sen. Barack Obama channeled his inner Reagan and MLK in his ‘Reclaiming the American Dream’ speech delivered today in –where else? — Bettendorf, Iowa! Before Obama even took stage, his campaign staff informed us that they’ve assembled various experts to comment on his speech (Who knew we had American Dream experts?). After the jump, the experts pucker up. But what we really want to know is what YOU think of his speech. Let’s talk about our feelings.

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Can you feel the electricity? We’re just minutes away from the president’s major speech on terrorism. Wonkette HQ will alas be multitasking over the course of the address, but hey, that’s why Scott McClellan has a job, right? MORE »