December 10, 2013
Earlier this year, a court ruled that Roland Burris could not run in a special election to finish out the final weeks of his term, from the November election until the new Congress meets. The court said that was only for candidates who were also running in the election for a full term in Burris’ [...]
We assume that guest editor Josh Fruhlinger knew all along, ever since he wrote this post about some mean and very very naked state senator three years ago, that this same asshole would sooner or later win Ted Kennedy’s (and John F. Kennedy’s before him) Massachusetts Senate seat after the legend’s death, severely endangering the [...]
Aww, Michael Steele and his minions weren’t allowed to do stuff in Massachusetts. So Michael Steele is just pretending that he is a secret agent pulling the strings behind closed doors. This should keep him distracted for another few hours. [Politico] HEY, HARVARD COMMIES: If you go to vote for the robot lady, but Scott [...]
YES. Real-life voters making crass, childish comments about their polling locations and others’ political beliefs! This completely re-justifies the Globe‘s existence. And the best part is…
SEND SEXY ELECTION DAY PICS TO YOUR WONKETTE, YOU “MASSHOLES”: Considering how gay and Maoist you people are, a sizable chunk of you probably live in Massachusetts, the site of today’s exciting political election between a poorly programmed Democratic robot and the naked person. What a great opportunity to help your Wonkette! If you are [...]
John Kerry, who polls suggest is one of only a handful of Democrats remaining in Massachusetts, is furious over the Naked Republican’s insurgent campaign, calling his supporters “tea baggers” and all. He’s already rolled up one sleeve, don’t make him roll up the second! Because then… well then he might have to write a principled [...]
Where do the Teabaggers in Texas who are phone-banking Massachusetts households come up with this shit? “I just got a polling call about Martha Coakley. I also had to answer questions about gay marriage, Israel, and malaria, including this one: ‘In World War II, 6 million Jews were killed by the Nazis. Now 6 million [...]
Ha ha… whoops.
OBAMA TO CAMPAIGN FOR MISS ROBOT THIS WEEKEND: Hooray! Barack Obama has listened exclusively to Wonkette’s advice and will campaign for Martha Coakley & Thugs in Massachusetts this Sunday. Marc Ambinder has listed 10,000 specific political expert reasons for him to do this. SHORT VERSION: because c’mon, gotta win it, right? [Marc Ambinder]
Naked Massachusetts person Scott Brown is flyin’ high, and is almost certain to defeat Martha Coakley in the state’s special Senate election next Tuesday, since he is only losing by five or eight percentage points. Were he to pull off a victory, he would almost certainly switch to the Democratic party within seventeen seconds, because [...]
Barack Obama needs your help, sheeple! The broad up there in Massachusetts, Martha Coakley, just has zero fucking clue what she’s doing or what’s going on at all, so maybe volunteer and pass some leaflets around for a few days, jesus… [The Plum Line]
Oh man, this would piss the wingnuts off so much, and we wouldn’t blame them. Michael Steele, the animated .gif in charge of the Republican party, sees that his moderate conservative (communist) Republican candidate in the NY-23 special election, Scuzzlebutt, is losing by billions of percentage points to both the Democratic candidate and the “Conservative [...]
Have we even posted about the comical NY-23 special congressional election yet? Don’t think so! Fortunately lazy Hollywood dandy Fred “Dipshit McGoo” Thompson, who pretended to run for president once, for about two months, before losing miserably everywhere, has provided us with the perfect on-ramp here.
It has only been a week — one week — since Ted Kennedy died, and already some gal has exploited this by declaring her candidacy for the special election happening like 2 minutes from now. Her name is Martha Coakley and she has been the state’s Attorney General since 2006. We checked out her Wikipedia [...]
Now that the question of what to do about Ted Kennedy’s Senate seat is no longer an academic one, folks in Boston seem to be giving the issue a little re-think. Remember Kennedy wrote to the governor recently asking him if he couldn’t perhaps do something about that terrible law Democrats passed in 2004, the [...]