south korea

Well here’s a head-scratcher, courtesy of John Prager at Americans Against the Tea Party: a photo of a textbook that asks kids what they think — did astronauts really go to the moon? Prager found this image on the interwebs and recalled it as something very similar to what he’d been taught as a child […]

Hello Americans. Today we are writing very slowly, because we know that you don’t read very fast. Or good. And we promise to stay away from complicated math, simple math, and any scientific theories more complicated than gravity, because apparently our kids isn’t learning very good. At all. According to a test administered to 15-year-olds […]

So maybe you heard this thing about how North Korea says it has nullified the 1953 cease-fire that ended the Korean War, and it has also disconnected its emergency hotline to South Korea. And maybe you are wondering, like we are, whether this is something to be maybe kind of worried about — in that […]

BUT WHO WILL FIGHT THE GREEDY CORPORATE PIGS RUNNING THE COUNTRY? Haha, you thought, “the Wall Street protesters.” WRONG. “Sarah Palin” is the correct answer, ever since the five or so seconds ago when she vaguely tuned into the fact that the withered teat of her ruthless teabagger fearmongering is drying up, so she must […]

The Egyptian People are still very angry at their trillionaire dictator, even though Dick Cheney has said repeatedly that Mubarak is “a good man” and “an extraordinary [rendition] friend.” And now labor strikes have erupted all over Egypt, including a sit-in by “about 6,000 workers at five service companies owned by the Suez Canal Authority,” […]

How do you know which side in any conflict has the technological advantage? Hint: It’s not the side sending angry faxes, in 2010. This is what North Korea is doing to South Korea, faxing pages that “blame South Korea for the November 23 artillery attack on Yeonpyeong Island.” Harsh. Also, the faxes have been sent […]

If Iraq really does wind all the way down, America will only have one war. What will we do with ourselves?! No worries. Defying North Korean threats of violent retaliation and “brutal consequences beyond imagination,” South Korea on Monday staged live-fire artillery drills on an island shelled last month by the North. Retro! [NYT]

I FEEL FREE  3:43 pm December 13, 2010

North Korea Wants Eric Clapton

by Jack Stuef

According to diplomacy nip-slip site WikiLeaks, North Korea loves Eric Clapton and wants him to perform in their country as a Clapton-American favor of “good will,” which is what North Koreans call temporarily halting their development of nuclear weapons and targeting of South Koreans to shoot in exchange for free stuff from the West. Or […]

The Metropolitan Police arrested Julian Assange this morning in London, on suspicion of not wearing a condom in Sweden. (What?) This whole debacle is very quickly developing into some sort of unfortunate James Bond Romcom Bollywood Thriller. One of Assange’s accusers has ties to the CIA, and WikiLeaks has threatened to release the key to […]

Mama Sasquatch Sarah Palin made a special appearance on Glenn Beck’s famous radio program, “George Soros Is A Jew,” this morning, and good gravy, she talked about some heavy stuff! When asked by one of Beck’s radio lackeys how she would “handle a situation like the one that just developed in North Korea” after she […]

Did you hear there’s a new “dictator in waiting” in lovely North Korea? He’s the twerp child of the current twerp, who is the child of the OG twerp, because that is how democracy works in the people’s paradise of North Korea. And this new kid, 26-year-old Kim Jong-Un, is “deliberately destabilizing the environment in […]

This week, Barack Obama went over to Asia to see what happens when a model minority owns an entire continent. He obvs already knew, because his hippie mom made him live there in some off-the-grid shack for a hot minute with a foreign non-daddy, but it was worth another look to see if anything had […]

Oh, Jimmy Carter is in North Korea right now? That’s funny, because Kim Jong-il is in China with his son. Yeah, hope you enjoy talking to a country full of Kim Jong-il’s servants, peanut man, because ol’ Jong face can’t make it in today. Too busy with his gay life partner China. JIMMY CARTER, YOU […]

As we reported earlier in the week, North Korea now has official state-run Twitter and YouTube accounts, where it posts news videos about important dogs. According to South Korea, who likes to stalk its ex North Korea online, DPRK now has joined your parents and grandparents on Facebook. It does not have a fan page, […]

Hillary Clinton visited the DMZ today to point and say, “That thing over there? That thing is going to pay for what it is doing.” The hot new 2010 edition of U.S. sanctions against North Korea were announced and took a turn on the runway. What’s in fashion this year? “She said the measures would […]